Mistake
by FandomObsessedGirl1
Summary: Jane and Lisbon have a bit too much to drink at the Christmas work dinner, and Lisbon unexpectedly invites Jane back to her apartment. A few months later, Lisbon discovers something about that night which will change their lives (and relationship) forever... Lots of Jane/Lisbon fluff, a few M rated scenes, and eventual romance...
1. Chapter 1

**I know I shouldn't be starting another story when I haven't finished my current one…but here I go anyway! (Feel free to check out my other story if you want) This is just an idea that popped into my head; I hope you like it**

 **There are M rated scenes from Chapter 1, just to warn you…**

It was 2 days before Christmas, and the serious crimes floor of the CBI office was covered in tinsel and baubles (all Jane's doing, of course). Lisbon was sat in her office, trying to get some last minute paperwork done. The rest of the team were seated around the table in the bullpen, with Jane trying to determine what each of his colleagues would receive that Christmas. He was currently working on Van Pelt, who was noting down each of his predictions and laughing at his reasoning behind them.

"And…" Jane paused dramatically, closing his eyes "yoga pants, from a friend who has no idea what else to get you"

"Oh god I hope not, I've got so many already" Van Pelt muttered, adding the final item to the list.

"Tick them off as you open them Grace, I await my ten bucks" he told her confidently.

"I wouldn't put it past you to go out and buy all these things so that they mysteriously appeared under my tree" she pointed out, tucking the list in her pocket "Will Lisbon be done soon? It's nearly 6; the table's booked for half past"

The team were planning on going out for dinner together that evening. Since Christmas fell on a Sunday this year, they could go out on the Friday night and still have the Saturday off to do any last minute shopping. Most of the floor had given up the notion of doing any work at around half past 4, but Lisbon was diligently working away until the last possible moment.

"It's only five minutes away, she'll be out at 6:25 on the dot" Rigsby joked, quickly looking over his shoulder to check that his boss hadn't heard.

"In the meantime, Cho, your turn" Jane said, turning to his next victim.

"Alright"

Cho picked up a pen and grabbed his scrap of paper, the edges of his mouth turning up ever so slightly, as he waited to see what Jane would come up with.

Lisbon ended up joining them at quarter past six. The new boss, Agent Gable, had passed her office and popped his head round the door to tell her that he was ordering her to stop working right that minute. After a few minutes of futile protest, Lisbon relented and packed up her things before leaving her office to join her team.

"Shall we go then? I know it's a bit early, but I'm sure they won't mind"

"Lisbon I'm going with you" Jane told her, as the rest of the team got to their feet and set about collecting their things.

"That's fine, is your car still not fixed?" 

"Nope, they said the 27th"

"If you didn't have such a ridiculous car" she muttered under her breath, but still loud enough for Jane to catch.

"You love it really, now let's go, the others can meet us there"

"Are you ready to order?"

A young waiter approached the table. From his attitude and the crisp newness of his uniform, Jane determined that this must be his second shift.

"Um yes, I'll have the steak please" Lisbon said, after Jane nudged her to order first.

"Plaice fillet" Jane nodded "also there's no need to worry about losing your job yet, your boss clearly likes you"

The waiter flushed bright red and muttered a thank you, his eyes at the floor. The rest of the table ordered quickly, with Van Pelt shooting Rigsby a look as he ordered an extra side of chips.

"Oh, and can we have 5 glasses of your best white wine please?" Jane added, as the waiter was just about to leave.

"Jane!" Lisbon complained "some of us have to drive"

"Oh relax for once Lisbon; you can share my cab"

"And what about my car?" she pointed out.

"You can collect it tomorrow as part of your morning run"

She rolled her eyes at him, inwardly cursing him for always managing to know such random details about her life. The word _relax_ did remain in her thoughts for a few minutes though. He was right; she did need to relax more. Having an extra drink or two and getting a taxi home instead of driving would definitely constitute 'relaxing'. It was meant to be a celebration of another successful year of hard work – the most successful yet, some could argue – and maybe it would be better for all of them if she let go of her sensible cop side for one evening and just enjoyed her friends' company.

So Lisbon gave in and sipped happily at her wine when it arrived. She laughed with the others at Rigsby's light hearted impressions of their new boss, and sided with Van Pelt in her attempts to persuade Jane that psychics were real. She even went so far as to order the table another glass of wine each, enjoying the look of shock on her consultant's face.

"It's a celebration" she reasoned to her team "we did really well this year, and I want to thank you all for your hard work"

They all knew exactly what she was referring to. The discovery and capture of Red John had been something they had all been working towards for years. Despite the fact that things hadn't gone entirely to plan and she had ended up shooting him instead of bringing him in, Lisbon had never felt more relief than when that particular case was closed, and she knew that she would have made it without the help of her team.

"I actually wanted to say something, if that's ok?" Jane began, his face lacking its charming grin for once.

Their silence acted as a cue for him to continue.

"I know I haven't always been the easiest person to work with"

Lisbon snorted loudly, and he glared at her.

"Ok maybe that's an understatement…but you all stayed with me despite that, and when it mattered most – when we worked out how we could catch Red John - you trusted me" he paused and took a breath "so thank you all. As much as I would have liked to have had him all to myself, I know in reality that I couldn't have done it without you, and I'll never be able to repay you for finally freeing my life of him"

The whole team sat in silence following Jane's heartfelt thanks. Rigsby looked down at the table and started fiddling with his napkin.

"We couldn't have done it without you, Jane" Van Pelt responded softly.

"No, nobody else could come up with such a crazy plan" Cho added, almost smiling.

The moment was broken by the arrival of their food and second lot of wine, and they soon returned to their normal jokey atmosphere. Lisbon remained quiet for a little longer than the others. It was the first time Jane had actually talked about what had happened 2 months ago, and she was relieved that he finally seemed at peace with it. She had assumed for a while that he was angry at her, because she had been the one to shoot him, not him. From what he had just said, it seemed that that wasn't the case. That he was genuinely grateful for what they had done, and nothing more.

Lisbon took a large sip of wine and pushed all thought of Red John to the back of her mind. They were here to celebrate, she reminded herself, and that's what she was going to continue to do.

Van Pelt decided that it was time to go home at half ten. She apologised for leaving, saying that she had to be up early to drive to her parents the next day. Although Lisbon couldn't help but notice the small smile Rigsby and Van Pelt had shared as she left, she decided not to say anything about it. It was Christmas after all. Unsurprisingly, Rigsby said he had to head off 5 minutes later. He thanked them for the nice evening, and then paused as if he was going to say something in response to Jane's mini speech earlier. Clearly unable to find the words, he settled on a smile and a 'Merry Christmas' before walking away. It only took one of Jane's card tricks before Cho left as well, leaving Lisbon seated at the table with her consultant.

"That was nice, to relax for a change" Lisbon told him, hoping that he picked up on it as an implicit thanks for his earlier comment.

She was feeling sleepy, most likely a result of the beer and 3 glasses of wine she had consumed throughout the evening. As a result of her upbringing, she rarely drank, so she had forgotten how easily alcohol affected her.

"I'm just going to the restroom, have you booked a cab already?"

"No, I'll do it now"

Lisbon stood up, holding onto her chair as she realised the full effects of her alcohol consumption. She made her way slowly to the restroom, focussing on moving her feet in a natural manner and trying to hide the fact that her vision was slightly fuzzy. When she returned a few minutes later, Jane was chatting away to the waiter who had taken their orders. She sat back down next to him, and listened as Jane told the young boy that he shouldn't worry so much about failing, and that in doing so he was actually increasingly the likelihood of failure. He continued to tell him that his parents were proud of him regardless of the fact that he had dropped out of college to start his own business, and that perseverance would get him there. The boy thanked him profusely, so in awe of his ability to read him that he plucked up the courage to ask his boss if he could give them two glasses of wine on the house, which arrived a few minutes later.

"Oh come on Lisbon, one more won't hurt" Jane said, picking up immediately on her reluctance to touch the wine "the cab won't be here for another 5 minutes"

Even without his persuasion she would have drunk it anyway. The pleasant fuzzy effect of alcohol was already spreading through her body; she wasn't quite ready to let it go yet. They sipped at their glasses of wine, joking about some of the cases they had encountered that year, and trying to work out which plan had been Jane's most outrageous. Lisbon was fairly certain that Jane was a little tipsy from the way he kept touching her arm – not as tipsy as her, of that she was sure, but still a little bit. She knew that she should stop him - it was unprofessional, if nothing else - but she couldn't bring herself to tell him to stop because, to be perfectly honest, she was enjoying the fact that he felt comfortable enough to be doing so, even after what had happened with Red John.

The cab arrived a few minutes later, and they left. They were just like two normal friends going home from a Christmas dinner. Not two close colleagues who had spent the last 7 years hunting down a horrific murderer. It was so nice to feel _normal_ for once, Lisbon decided. To relax like normal people, and to share a cab home with a friend. She was almost dreading arriving back at her apartment by this point, it was cold and heartless in comparison with the atmosphere around her friends. It was a nice enough place, but she'd never felt like it was _home_. She still hadn't ever unpacked properly, just the things she needed on a day to day basis were accessible, but all her memories from childhood and college remained in their cardboard boxes. She spent the majority of her time working, and the little spare time she did have was devoted to exercise, not sitting around in her apartment. So when the cab arrived in her neighbourhood, fuelled by wine and the highs of a lovely evening out, she made a very rash decision.

"Do you want to come in for a bit? Have some tea or…or something?"

She regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth. What was she thinking? Asking Jane in seemed so personal, too personal. It wasn't like he hadn't been to her apartment before, but in the past he had come round to discuss a plan on how to save her job. And it had been in the daytime as well.

"Sure, why not?" he shot her his normal charming smile.

Maybe it wasn't so weird, and she was just over thinking it. Maybe it was just another perfectly normal thing that friends did that she had forgotten about in all that time she had spent wrapped in her job, hunting down murderers. Lisbon calmed down almost immediately and sighed happily. She should listen to alcohol more often; she was looking forward to re-entering her apartment much more now, knowing that her and Jane could carry on their normal jokey conversations and insult swapping.

"Lisbon, you don't have a Christmas tree!" Jane exclaimed upon entering her living room.

In fact there were near to no signs that the festive season was upon them, just a small pile of presents from her brothers in the corner.

"Well noticed genius" she said, rolling her eyes at him.

"Are you going away so you won't need one?"

"Nope, I'll be right here" she pointed at the couch.

"Wait, you're spending Christmas day sitting around here by yourself? Are you even having Christmas dinner?" he appeared genuinely upset at this realisation.

"Of course" she lied, grinning a little too much at him. Technically whatever she consumed on Christmas day would be Christmas dinner, even if it wasn't the traditional version.

A very small part of her wanted to ask if he wanted to join her on Christmas, knowing full well that he too would be spending it alone. Even the alcohol told her that this was a bad idea, so she refrained, and settled with sitting down on the couch as gracefully as she could manage after 4 glasses of wine.

"Oh, your tea!"

Lisbon jumped up, suddenly remembering why she had invited him back in the first place. Unfortunately the combination of the alcohol in her system and the sudden movement did not go together well, and she ended up clinging onto the back of the couch as the room swayed around her.

"I'll come and help" Jane said, getting up from the couch, much better at hiding the fact that the room had become a little hazy even for him.

He couldn't help but laugh at the sight of her walking in a zig-zaggy line from the couch to the kitchen. She was normally so in control of herself (and others, if she could manage it), but at the moment it was taking all her concentration not to actually fall over in her own living room.

"Drunk Lisbon is something I have always wanted to see" he admitted, holding his hand out to guide her.

"Oh shut up" she said, swatting his hand away "I'm not drunk, you're drunk"

"Yes, of course" he agreed quietly.

"What tea does Jane want?" she muttered to herself, opening the cupboard door.

She took out the only box of tea she actually owned (which she had actually bought specifically for when Jane had come round in the past) and handed it to him.

"Um Lisbon?" Jane said, chuckling gently "This…this is empty"

"Oh…oops"

She giggled. It was very unlike Lisbon to giggle at anything, especially not an empty box of tea, and Jane wasn't entirely sure how to react to it.

"I'm sorry" she said, taking deep breaths to try and stop her laughter.

"Ok, so apparently I don't have tea" she stated, finally regaining control of herself and going very quiet and still.

"What is it?" Jane asked her "You've gone all…quiet. You're never quiet"

"It's a silly thing" she said slowly "but my brother gave me some wine as a present last Christmas, and I said to myself that I would drink it on a special occasion sometime in the year"

"Right, presents are good" Jane nodded sincerely.

"But I never got round to drinking it" she explained, looking very sad "and now it's nearly the next Christmas and I should have drunk it by now"

This behaviour was even less like Lisbon than the giggling. She suddenly seemed very vulnerable, enough to become emotional over the thought of not having used a gift in time. This wasn't the badass cop he knew, who would take down men twice her size and shoot people without thinking twice. Jane wasn't really sure how to react; he wasn't used to dealing with a drunk Lisbon, much less a drunk emotional Lisbon.

"We can have it now" he exclaimed with much more enthusiasm than he had intended "we never really celebrated finishing the whole Red John shebang" he told her, waving his hand vaguely to try and help his argument.

"That's true" she responded, nodding slowly "and its better than me drinking the whole bottle by myself on Christmas day"

"Definitely" he smiled widely at her.

Half an hour, and nearly the whole bottle of wine later, Jane arrived at a conclusion. He was drunk. He was really and properly drunk. In his attempts to save Lisbon from an awful hangover he had selflessly had twice as much of the wine as her, arguing that he weighed more than her and was particularly good at mentally counteracting the effects of alcohol. So much for that idea. He was now trying to do card tricks on her but was somehow failing miserably, causing both of them to collapse in laughter each time he pulled out the wrong card.

"Look at us" Lisbon began, taking a sip of wine straight from the bottle "we're really just normal, fun people"

"Who ever said we weren't fun?" Jane pointed out, slurring slightly and taking the bottle from her hand "and don't you dare accuse me of being normal. You…you…"

He poked her in the arm, trying to come up with a noun to complete his sentence but failing and letting his arm fall to his side.

"Yes…me" Lisbon grinned at him happily.

"I like you Lisbon; you're a nice person" Jane declared suddenly.

"I'm glad, I like me too"

"No no no" he shook his head wildly "you're meant to say that you like me too, we're friends"

"But I don't want to lie to you" she complained, winking very obviously in his direction "you always know when I'm lying"

"Oh…that hurts Lisbon, that hurts" he threw a hand dramatically over his heart, before taking another sip of the wine.

"I'll tell you what" she paused and hiccupped "you can have a very rare and special Lisbon hug as an apology"

"Oh, if I must" he grumbled, shuffling himself along the sofa to sit beside her.

"I don't think you understand quite how special these are" she warned him.

Lisbon turned her body towards him and he leant forward and wrapped his arms around her, tucking his head into the crook of her neck. He let out a contented sigh, and squeezed her body tightly, breathing in the subtle floral scent of her hair. This was another nice, friendly thing to do, Lisbon told herself. Friends hugged all the time, didn't they? Despite her thoughts, Lisbon couldn't help but notice what an intimate position they were in. Jane's hair was tickling her nose and his soft breath was causing the hairs on her neck to stand on end. Finally, he seemed to have realised quite how much time had passed and relaxed his grip, allowing her to extract herself gently.

The position they found themselves in was in some ways, even more intimate than their hug. Jane's face was inches from her own, and she was almost scared to breathe in case it disturbed the frozen intensity of the moment. Before her alcohol addled brain could catch up with what was going on, Jane had moved forward and met her lips with his own. Lisbon knew that she should stop it, she knew that this was an awful idea, spurred on almost entirely but the large quantity of wine they had consumed that evening, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it. So she let Jane press his lips against hers with more pressure, and started to kiss him back, twisting her fingers into his soft hair. Taking this as a signal that it was ok to continue, he let his body take over from his brain and ran his hands over her back, letting them come to rest at her waist as he kissed her more passionately. Their kiss became more urgent, more desperate. Lisbon hadn't kissed anyone like this for years. Hell, she didn't think she'd ever kissed anyone like this before, not with this feeling of raw need and intense passion. She slid her hands down from his hair and onto his chest, grabbing at the front of his shirt to pull him closer to her. He was devouring her mouth, nibbling at her bottom lip before sucking on it. Jane slid his hands to the small of his back, gently rubbing the skin that was exposed beneath her shirt.

"Jane…" she whispered, pulling away for a second "We shouldn't…"

Jane attacked her mouth again, pushing her backwards into the couch so that he was leaning over her. He slid his hands round to her stomach beneath her shirt, and she moaned quietly into his mouth, pulling him down closer to her. She'd given up on the idea of stopping him now. She knew that she would regret this as soon as the alcohol had worn off, but for now she was simply enjoying it too much. Jane's hands slid further up her body, his fingers brushing lightly at her breasts through her bra. Lisbon felt a tingle of excitement run through her, spurring her on to undo the first of his shirt buttons. And then the rest of them. She had secretly been a little disappointed when he had turned up at work that morning with no vest on (claiming that he couldn't find the matching one); now she was relieved – two layers of buttons would have been too much for her to handle.

Before they realised what was happening, both their shirts had been taken off and discarded on the floor. Jane leant on his side for a minute, taking the opportunity to slide Lisbon's trousers off and throw them down to join their shirts. He was thrown for a minute, by the sight of her lying in nothing but her underwear beside him. Even in his drunken state, he recognised quite how perfect she was. His eyes roamed over her body, counting the freckles which were scattered across her pale skin. Her underwear wasn't showy, but plain black and practical; exactly what he expected from her, but the sight of it was enough to ignite a deep need for her. He devoured her mouth once again, as she tugged at his pants and he slid his hand down her stomach.

He was inside her within minutes. Satisfied moans emanated from the couch as Lisbon ran her hands over his back in delight. She had forgotten about everything else in the world; that this was her colleague and close friend, that they were both very drunk, that she would regret this for months… All her worries had drained away the moment he entered her. It felt right – the desperation and desire between them as he thrust relentlessly into her. She ran her nails over his back, digging them into his skin as she kissed him hungrily. His hands, which had paused temporarily tangled up in her hair, started to move all over her body again. He squeezed one of her breasts and she moaned into his mouth into response. He almost lost control and came at that point, but he managed to hold himself together. Just. He pulled away from his kiss for a moment, only to push her legs up and hook them over his shoulders. At this angle Lisbon could feel him pushing deeper inside her, as she felt herself moving closer and closer to the edge. It didn't take long for her to come, and she shouted out in ecstasy as the waves of pleasure rolled over her. This was too much for Jane to take, and his release hit him as Lisbon's ended.

He flopped down on top of her, too exhausted to move. They lay panting together on the couch for a few moments, their skin damp and hot from the exertion. Then Jane managed to find the energy to move off her and shuffled over to lie beside her, grateful that her couch was wider than his brown one in the CBI office. Lisbon suddenly became aware and slightly embarrassed of the fact that she was stark naked, so she tugged down a blanket that was thrown over the back of the couch and threw it over them. She turned on her side, facing her living room with her back to him. She was starting to realise quite how tired she was, and felt her eyes slowly dropping shut as her breathing evened. The last thing she remembered before she dropped off completely, was Jane turning onto his side and curling around her, laying an arm protectively over her body.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for all the lovely reviews! I'm glad you liked the first chapter! I'm afraid there won't be much M rated Jane/Lisbon action for a few chapters, but rest assured I won't frustrate you for too long ;)**

It was Christmas Eve, and Teresa Lisbon was just waking up. The first thing which became apparent in her semi conscious state was her thumping headache, followed closely by her dry mouth. She couldn't bring herself to open her eyes, and pulled the blanket around her, groaning and snuggling into the back of the couch. Waking up and finding herself on the couch didn't surprise her much, it often happened when she stayed up late to work on case files (she kept the blanket there for that reason). What she was surprised to find, was the fact that there was no barrier of pyjamas between her and the blanket. She was completely naked. She forced her eyes open a little. She could just about see her living room, looking a little messier than usual with yesterday's attire scattered across it. She opened her eyes wider, and rubbed them as the room slowly came into focus. Hearing the gentle humming from the kitchen, she suddenly became very aware that there was another person in her apartment. She thought back to the night before, her memories fuzzy and muddled together. _There was definitely wine_ , she thought to herself, _and the team_ , but beyond that she could recall very little. Who was this mystery man in her kitchen (she assumed it was a man from the low tone of the humming)? _Please tell me I didn't call Mashburn_ , Lisbon begged herself. She liked Walter Mashburn, but the idea of her drunk calling him and inviting him over to spend the night was too humiliating to even think about.

"Morning sleepyhead" the man greeted her, stepping through into her living room with a fresh cup of tea in his hand.

 _Jane._

Suddenly the rest of her evening hit her like a bus. Sharing a cab back, inviting him in, opening a bottle of wine and….a lot more. For a few moments Lisbon lay frozen, unable to even process her realisation. Then she forced herself back to reality and jumped up from the couch, hastily wrapping the blanket around her.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded, ignoring the fact that the room was swaying a little around her.

"You invited me in, if I remember rightly" he responded, a little smugly.

"Jane, this was a horrible mistake, you need to leave" she said firmly.

"What…but Lisbon I-"

"Please Jane"

"Lisbon I didn't want to-"

"Jane" she said, her voice louder and more authoritative "I'm sorry but you need to go. And never, ever bring this up again. Please"

"I…ok, fine"

He nodded slowly, and then picked his jacket up from the chair beside him.

"I've um, made you some breakfast. It's in the kitchen" he told her, opening the door and turning to face her for a moment.

When she didn't respond, he simply nodded again and walked out, shutting the door gently behind him. Lisbon sunk down to the floor by the door the moment he left. How could she have been so stupid? He was her consultant, and more importantly, her best friend. And now she'd ruined all of that; not just by sleeping with him, but by throwing him out without even an explanation.

After a few minutes of sitting on the floor and wallowing in despair, Lisbon forced to herself to her feet. She rearranged the blanket into a temporary dress, and made her way into the kitchen. Never had her need for coffee been more pronounced. Once in the kitchen, a wave of guilt hit her, finding the plate of jam on toast and fresh cup of coffee Jane had left her. Lisbon sunk into the chair and tucked into it, tasting little. She now felt even worse about kicking him out. Granted, this was partially his fault. If she remembered rightly – which given the circumstances, could not be the case – _he_ had been the one to kiss her. But she had been the one to invite him in and offer him more wine. And she hadn't exactly tried to stop him kissing her. Or stop herself undressing him…

Lisbon groaned in despair. What had she done? How on earth was she meant to turn up at work in two days time and act like everything was normal between them? As if they hadn't had sex, he hadn't seen her naked… Oh god, Patrick Jane had seen her naked. She groaned again at this realisation.

Having finished the toast, she picked up the coffee and sipped at it, enjoying the sensation of the hot liquid running down her throat and into her stomach. It was surprisingly good coffee from a tea aficionado, she noted.

Once she finished the coffee, Lisbon allowed herself to view the situation with some clarity. Yes, it was a huge and embarrassing mistake, but it wasn't completely the end of the world was it? She would go into work first thing on Monday morning, call Jane into her office and apologise. And then make him promise never to mention it again. Pushing away the thoughts of him being able to imaging her naked as she spoke to him, Lisbon sat back in her seat, feeling a lot calmer with her plan. A tiny niggling thought asked her why she couldn't have just done that this morning, but she pushed it away. The past was the past; she couldn't go back and change it so she would just have to deal with it.

Lisbon got up and headed to her bathroom. She opened the cabinet and took out two packets of pills; painkillers and contraceptive. She mentally thanked God for the fact that she was on the pill; she would be feeling a whole lot worse if there was any chance of her being pregnant with Patrick Jane's child. Dropping her blanket dress to the floor, she stepped into the shower. She let the hot water run over her body, washing away any evidence of the previous night.

After a long, cleansing shower, Lisbon changed into her running kit. She normally turned to exercise when she found things difficult, and this would be no different.

Patrick Jane arrived back at his apartment after driving around aimlessly for an hour. He had no idea what he had been thinking the night before. He should have talked to her instead of kissing her, but he had been too drunk to think logically. When he had woken the next morning and extracted himself carefully from behind her, he had decided to tell her the truth. He'd dressed and made her breakfast, knowing that he would get nowhere until she had had her coffee. And then she'd woken up and kicked him out. She probably hated him, he thought sadly. Not that he blamed her for that. From her point of view, it had probably looked like all he wanted was sex and she had been available and willing. If only he'd told her the truth before sticking his tongue down her throat. He doubted she would even talk to him for a good few weeks, and trying to explain to her the real reason behind his actions would look a little…false now. As if he'd slept with her and felt bad about it and told her he had feelings for her to make up for it. _Feelings_ , he laughed internally, these had been feelings about 5 years ago. It was a lot more than just feelings now.

He knew that there was nothing he could do to fix this right now, she needed time and space before he'd even have a chance to explain and redeem himself. He wondered what Angela would have had to say about this. He'd moved past the point where he had felt guilty for liking Lisbon because of his wife, and she had now become and internal source of advice. She'd tell him that he was an idiot, he thought, smiling to herself as he imagined her berating him. And then point out that Lisbon was also the most important person in his life. His partner and best friend. And she'd probably mention that Lisbon knew that too, and that he did just need to give her space. Charlotte would probably roll her eyes at her father's stupidity, and ask if he was really the sort of person to give up on something, even after a (rather momentous) mistake. They were right, he knew. He had spent 7 years hunting down the person who had taken them from him, and he'd made mistakes along the way, but that had never stopped him. And he wasn't going to give up on Lisbon, not until she truly knew how he felt about her.

 _What if she doesn't want me?_ That was the nub of the problem. Without that little bubble of doubt he would have had no issue walking into her CBI office and proclaiming his love for her. He'd have done it in front of his team, his boss, the whole of the CBI even. The idea of embarrassing himself like that didn't really bother him. Her reaction to it was what scared him the most, and was precisely why he had ended up having sex with her instead of sharing his feelings.

Jane sat down on his apartment couch. There was nothing he could do to resolve this until they got back to work (and she was willing to talk to him). He flicked through the channels on the telly until he found a nice nature documentary. He settled down and started watching it, lasting half an hour before he dozed off.

Lisbon had never dreading going into work as much as she did that Boxing Day. She was relieved that her team hadn't been on call over Christmas, or she would have faced the danger of unexpectedly seeing Jane before she had time to mentally prepare herself. Nonetheless, she somehow managed to dress herself and have something to eat (despite the nausea pooling in her stomach) before driving into work. She walked into her office with purpose, trying not to check the couch to see if he was already there. He wasn't thankfully. She sat down at her desk, flicking aimlessly through her emails in case she had missed anything important the past two days, when someone knocked on the door. For some reason, Jane had decided to knock and wait instead of wandering in like he normally did. She nodded at him to enter, trying to breathe normally despite the fact that her heart was now hammering in her chest.

"Teresa, can I talk to you for a moment?" he asked, letting himself in and coming to stand in front of her desk.

She was thrown by his use of her first name, but tried not to let it distract her.

"Yes, I wanted to talk to you too actually" she told him "I'm sorry about…about what happened. I wasn't thinking; I was drunk; I shouldn't have let that happen. And I'm sorry for being so rude to you the next morning"

"I'm sorry too, I should have-"

"Look, we made a mistake" she cut him off "we'll just forget about it and move on, ok?"

"Yeah, ok" he shrugged. She had never before seen him look so uncomfortable and so _quiet_.

"And never mention it again" she added with a glare.

He nodded slowly and turned away from her, making his way to the door. With his hand on the handle, he turned back to her and addressed her again.

"I really am sorry"

"It wasn't completely your fault" she told him, allowing herself a tiny smile "now go, I have work to do"

He left and went straight to lie down on his couch. Lisbon found herself feeling a lot calmer. Maybe that hadn't gone exactly as she had planned, but he seemed genuinely sorry and actually willing to forget about it. Maybe their partnership wouldn't be as badly affected as she had thought. She went back through her emails, managing to actually read the information this time.

Jane meanwhile, had not found the same level of inner peace as her. He had gone in there intending to put his fears behind him and finally tell her how he felt. And instead he had agreed that it was a mistake and to forget all about it. His useless responses had reinforced that night as nothing but meaningless sex to her. Perhaps that was all it had been, and he was stupid to try and persuade himself otherwise.

His brain started working on a new plan almost immediately. It was apparent that simply talking to her wasn't going to accomplish his goal. He was incapable of actually sitting down and telling her the whole truth, so he decided to try a different tactic to show her how much she meant to him. Causing jealousy wasn't the way forward; he had seen how she had reacted when Lorelei was involved and it had just caused a rift between them. Besides, he didn't actually know if she liked him back at the moment. Being a jerk by rubbing a new relationship in her face would just piss her off, not make her realise that he was in love with her. He needed to be nice to her, to be honest and show her that she could trust him. And once he'd somehow managed to redeem himself in her eyes and show that he was actually a good person underneath, then he could try and move forward with this. He wasn't entirely sure how he was going to accomplish that right now, but at least he had something to work with. The rest would fall into place, it normally did.

Now feeling a little more content he smiled at the Elvis stain on the ceiling. All was most definitely not lost. It was a minor setback, but given the fact that she was talking to him and still wanted him as her friend, not the end of hope. He lay there for a while, thinking about all the nice things he could do for her: solve cases without getting them into trouble, tell her his plans before carrying them out, make her spontaneous coffees…Yes, this was definitely the best way forward.

"We're up" Lisbon told her team a few hours later, stepping out of her office as she tucked her gun in its holster.

"What's the case?"

"Two men found shot dead in a barn" she explained, as her team got ready to go around her "Rigsby, you stay here"

Rigsby looked grateful to be able to stay at the office and out of the field for once. He looked pale and exhausted, and Lisbon suspected he was coming down with something. Lisbon drove to the crime scene with Van Pelt whilst Jane decided to go with Cho.

"Did much happen after I left on Friday?" Van Pelt asked her boss a short way into he journey.

"What? Oh no, not much" Lisbon replied, her tone high and slightly defensive.

Van Pelt didn't respond and they fell into silence. Lisbon mentally berated herself. She was overreacting; nobody else had any idea what happened and her acting weird would only raise suspicions.

"Nice Christmas?" Lisbon asked, eager to talk about anything other than that evening.

"Um yeah, lovely" Van Pelt replied, frowning slightly. It was very unlike her boss to make small talk "how about yours?"

"Yeah, ok I guess"

They resumed the silence. Apparently small talk didn't work for Lisbon; she decided that the silence was much more comfortable.

They arrived at the crime scene not long after. Cho and Jane had already been there for a few minutes, so Cho came to brief his boss on the case.

"Both shot once in the head, no casings found. We don't have names yet or a clear time of death, but forensics think sometime in the last 24 hours"

"Only one shot each? Sounds like a pro" Lisbon commented, following Cho over to the bodies.

The scene did look very neat and professional. The shooter had clearly killed them in quick succession, since their positions suggested that the second victim hadn't even had time to turn around or register what was happening before he was shot. Both men were dressed in suits, with no signs as to what they were doing in a barn in the middle of nowhere.

"Jane? Any thoughts?" Lisbon asked him, purposefully avoiding eye contact.

"Who kills someone on Christmas? Most likely a pro, as you said"

"Do we know how they got here?" Lisbon asked Cho.

"Local PD found a car just down the road, but it was reported missing two months ago. No wallets or ID in there, either the killer took them or they weren't carrying them at the time"

"Ok, do you have the details of the car's owner?"

Cho wordlessly handed her a piece of paper with a name and address on it.

"Me and Ja…me and Van Pelt will go and check it out. You head back to the office and see if the location is of any relevance. Find out who owns it, how often it's used"

Lisbon walked back to her car, followed by Van Pelt. She ignored the hurt look on Jane's face at what she had just said.

"So you haven't seen or heard anything about the car since it was stolen?"

Lisbon and Van Pelt were in the sitting room of an old lady with frizzy grey hair. She took a seat in the armchair opposite them, placing a large plate of biscuits on the table in front of them.

"Help yourselves" she smiled widely at them "and no I haven't, why? Have you found it?"

"Yes"

"Oh brilliant, I have missed my old car"

The woman looked delighted, clapping her hands together and rocking slightly in her seat.

"Please, do have a biscuit" she urged "they're ginger nuts; I make them for my grandchildren"

"Thanks" Lisbon said, feeling inclined to take one of the small biscuits "Unfortunately we believe it's connected to a double homicide. It was found a short way from where the victims were discovered"

"Oh that's awful…who was killed?"

"We haven't yet identified the victims, two men in their late thirties"

"I don't know any men in their late thirties" the woman responded slowly.

"Thanks for your help, we'll be in touch if we need anything else"

Lisbon and Van Pelt stood up, Lisbon with her half eaten biscuit still in her hand.

"Do you know when I'll get my car back?" the woman asked suddenly.

"We'll get hold of you as soon as forensics is finished with you. It shouldn't be more than a few days"

"Ok, thank you" she showed them to the door, trying to hand them more biscuits which they politely declined.

"Good luck with your investigation!" she called down the path after them.

"Wow, she was…enthusiastic" Van Pelt muttered.

"You don't say" Lisbon responded "but most likely completely uninvolved"

"Nice biscuits though"

"We've got IDs on both the victims" Rigsby told Lisbon the following morning, putting the phone down.

"Great, you and Van Pelt check them out. Have the families been informed?"

"Family" Rigsby corrected him, coughing "they're brothers. Local PD are on their way to the parents now"

"Poor parents, losing two sons in one go" Lisbon commented quietly "I'll take Cho and talk to them this afternoon. Are you sure you should be at work?" she added as Rigsby coughed again, gasping slightly for breath.

"I'm sure, I'm fine" he choked.

"Sure…if you get any worse then I'm ordering you to go home" she warned "have you seen Jane today?"

"Not yet"

"Ok, thanks Rigs"

She marched back into her office and collapsed into her chair. It had taken them a whole day to even get IDs on the victims, and in the meantime they had had no leads to go on. The fact that it was highly likely a pro job didn't help much; pros were very careful and difficult to catch. This case was already starting to frustrate her from the lack of information.

She caught sight of Jane walking out of the kitchen with his favourite blue tea cup in hand. He was probably working on some crazy theory, but she couldn't bring herself to go and ask him about it. She was too busy trying to avoid being alone with him, or even make eye contact for that matter.

By the time it reached 7pm, Lisbon had had enough of the case. She and Cho had talked to the family, who (as she predicted) were still in complete shock after having found out that both their sons had just been murdered. They had had a sister, but she was currently living in France with her husband and wouldn't be there until the next morning. The parents had been expecting one or both sons to come over for a bit on Christmas, but hadn't been overly worried when they never arrived. They had assumed that they were busy with girlfriends or whatnot.

They had visited both victims' places of work – an estate agents and a small legal firm – but hadn't come across anyone who stood out. It was impossible to tell which victim had been killed first, so they were unable to determine whether one or both had been the real target. Nobody even knew what they had been doing at the barn in the first place. The barn itself didn't offer much information. The owner told them that it wasn't used any more, and that he only went into it every few months or so. In fact, had he not been out looking for a sheep that had disappeared then the bodies would probably not have been discovered for a month or two.

Lisbon knew that there must be something going on beneath all of this. Two men didn't turn up at a barn on Christmas day dressed for a business meeting for no reason, there _had_ to be an explanation behind it. She just had no idea where to even begin to look for such an answer. Deciding that there was little more she could do on the case that evening (and given that the rest of her team had long gone home), she grabbed her bag and jacket and left her office. She hadn't been expecting Jane to still be out there, lying awake on his couch.

"Hey Lisbon" he called to her.

"Oh, hi Jane"

Somehow he was managing to act like nothing had happened between them. She had no idea how he did it; she had turned to doing all she could to avoid him as her coping mechanism.

"How long are you going to keep ignoring me?" he asked casually.

"Ignoring you? I'm not ignoring you"

Lisbon had her back to him as she locked her office door. She chose to take a little longer than normal to do so, hoping it would be long enough for her face to lose its red tinge before she turned to face him.

"Yes you are; you've been choosing other team members to check stuff out with you the past two days. I thought we were meant to be normal?"

Damn, so he had noticed her not so subtle team arrangements.

"Must be a coincidence" she shrugged "I have no problems working with you, regardless of what may have happened"

"Nothing did happen Lisbon, you said so yourself"

He grinned and winked at her. Lisbon dug around in her bag looking for her keys, hoping that her face hadn't betrayed her and blushed again. She was not ready for them to return to the occasionally flirtatious banter just yet.

"Whatever, night Jane"

"Night Lisbon"


	3. Chapter 3

**Hi! I watched 'Red John' and 'My Blue Heaven' last night after a few glasses of wine…Jane and Lisbon are so clearly in love then, it's so frustrating that they didn't just get together then**

 **Also I realise I haven't made it clear but I've slightly changed the Red John plot in this story, Jane got him just after the 6 months away in Vegas and the Lorelei stuff so this takes place about 8 years after Angela and Charlotte are killed and 7 years after he joined the CBI** **Plus the Blake Association isn't a big thing, more of a small circle of disciples (it's kind of irrelevant for the story, just in case anyone was unclear)**

"I called the parents this morning. The sister's flight got in about 5; she's at their house now. Do you want me and Van Pelt to go and speak to them?" Rigsby said to his boss the following morning.

"No, I'll go" Lisbon told him, sighing.

She was purposely trying to keep Rigsby and Van Pelt working separately. It was blatantly obvious to all that they were involved again and she didn't want her new boss finding that out. Lisbon wondered for a moment if anyone had any inkling of what had happened between her and Jane. She desperately hoped not.

"Jane" she called to him, trying to control her suddenly raised heart rate "you're coming with me to talk to the sister. I want to know what they were doing at that barn, maybe they told her something"

Lisbon secretly congratulated herself on managing to take him with her whilst Jane stood up from his couch and stretched. Now she just had to endure the half hour car journey.

"Do you want a coffee for the journey?" Jane asked her as they stepped into the elevator "there's a really nice café on the way, I could run in and get you one"

"I've just had one actually, but…thanks"

"Maybe on the way back then"

Lisbon frowned slightly. This was unlike Jane; he'd often made her stop for snacks and tea but never offered to go to a specific place just to get her a coffee. Maybe he had some scheme to solve the case and he was pre-emptively being nice to her.

Their car journey was spent in silence, aside from her warning him not to upset any of the family with murder accusations. It was a surprisingly comfortable silence she realised. Neither of them felt the need to talk about the weather or the case, they were content just to sit there and think individually. Talking to the sister didn't go quite so smoothly. To begin with everything had gone fine, and they were sat in the living room talking to a brown haired woman with puffy red eyes. And then Jane had leant over to Lisbon and warned her that he was about to rile her up. Lisbon was shocked; not just that he had actually pre-warned her about annoying someone, but at the sudden intimacy of feeling his breath on her neck as he whispered in her ear. She tried to stay put and not let the shivers of excitement at his proximity run through her. Before she could do anything to stop him, the woman was on her feet and shouting at him, whilst her parents rushed through from the other room to see what was going on. She and Jane left very swiftly after that, whilst she apologised profusely for his actions and tried to persuade the family not to complain to her superiors.

"You can't accuse a grieving woman of sleeping with her own brother Jane!" she told him, her hands tightly gripping the steering wheel as they drove away.

"She was clearly hiding something from her parents about the brothers, something which made her feel guilty and ashamed. I took a gamble"

"And were you right?"

"No, thankfully I wasn't. That would have been weird" he said, smiling slightly and earning himself a glare.

"She's still hiding something though" he maintained "I just don't know what yet"

"In the meantime, maybe you could learn that people don't react well to being accused of incest"

"It was a toss up between incest and murder. She doesn't strike me as the murderous type, plus her plane only came in this morning"

Lisbon couldn't even bring herself to reply to that. Somewhere, hidden beneath the depths of her irritation, was a small sentiment of relief. This felt just like normal times between them, with Jane pissing off suspects and her reprimanding him for it. Content in the realisation that things could, and would go back to normal between them, Lisbon pulled into the nearest parking space and secured the car. After that morning, she decided that she did need that coffee Jane had talked about earlier.

Three weeks had now passed since that incident with the grieving sister. The case had been solved, and it had turned out that what the she had been hiding was the fact that her brothers were secretly starting up a business together, and she had leant them the money. She had hidden it because she had inklings that there was something illegal about the business, and didn't want to upset her parents over it. The business had backfired when a powerful client had been unimpressed, leading to an arranged meeting at the barn and a hired assassin.

In the weeks following the case, Jane had managed to restrain himself from annoying too many suspects. Even more surprisingly, the plans which he was coming up with seemed legal, and actually fairly reasonable. Lisbon had no idea what had brought on this new, reformed Jane, but she was definitely a fan. She also felt as if their relationship was back to normal. Well almost normal; he was being a lot nicer to her than he used to be. He had started letting her in on his plans _before_ he carried them out, and surprising her with coffees and bearclaws on the days that she needed them. She still couldn't help but jump whenever he brushed past her though, or took her arm or touched the small of her back to direct her. She hoped that would go over time, it was getting difficult to explain why she was so jumpy to the rest of the team. She blamed it on high quantities of caffeine.

"Yes boss, I understand" Lisbon said into her phone, rolling her eyes.

It was 5am on a drizzly Tuesday morning. She had been awoken and called to a crime scene in the centre of Sacramento. She had been the first to arrive, and was currently trying to deal with Gable telling her that the death of an important businessman would surely attract the eyes of the media, and to do whatever she had to do to stop Jane going anywhere near them. The officer who had received the emergency call was waiting to fill her in. After hanging up, she took a deep breath and counted down from 20 before stepping towards him and indicating that he could start speaking.

"I got the call around 3, from a drunk man who was on his way home when he noticed the body. He thought he might have collapsed to start with, so he tried to shake him awake before he noticed the blood and called me"

"Brilliant, so he's moved the body round a bit" Lisbon muttered, sighing. Disrupted crime scenes could be a big inconvenience, especially if this man was a suspect.

"I got here as soon as I could. He has a single gunshot wound to the head, although there are some scratches on his hands that could suggest a struggle, along with the bruise on his left eye"

"That bruise is days old" Lisbon pointed out "as are the scratches"

The police officer looked unimpressed that his detective work had been so quickly discarded, but continued to relay what had happened. Cho was the next to arrive at the scene, followed closely by Jane. Jane took one look at the body and determined that he had been having an affair with a co-worker, a deduction which earned him a bemused look from the officer who had clearly not previously encountered him.

"How did you ID him?" Lisbon asked, trying to distract his attention away from Jane.

"CSIs found his wallet. I guess he was high profile enough for you to get involved instead of leaving it to us"

He sounded bitter but Lisbon let it pass. She knew how it felt when one of their cases was handed over to the FBI.

"Ok, thanks. Cho, Jane, lets head to the office. I'm freezing here"

They obliged, happy to be able to get out of the increasingly heavy drizzle and into their warm cars. Lisbon called Rigsby and Van Pelt on her way to the office, telling them not to bother with the crime scene and to go straight to the CBI. She was fairly certain they had been together when she had called them to alert them of the case, but she still said nothing. They had shown almost no signs of intimacy in the office, and it wasn't affecting their work. Plus, it would be a little hypocritical of her to say anything after having slept with Jane.

She arrived at the office to find that Jane had somehow beaten her there and stopped to buy her a muffin on the way, which he had left on her desk. She smiled to herself and took a small bite, before walking to the bull pen to get her team going on the case.

"Right, Jane and I'll go to his work. Jane seems to think that the victim was having an affair with a co-worker, I'm sure it won't take long to work out which one" Lisbon told her team. They were seated around the table in the bullpen, all the information about their victim laid out in front of them.

"Four minutes and…twelve seconds?" Jane guessed "Loser buys lunch? Come on Lisbon"

"Cho, take Rigsby to see the brother. Be careful, he has a history of violence" Lisbon continued, ignoring Jane.

Cho nodded, Rigsby looked a little disappointed to be separated from Van Pelt once again.

"Van Pelt, you stay here and look into his finances, property, anything. We'll meet back here and go over what we find after lunch"

They all got up and went their separate ways. Van Pelt went back to her desk and the others to collect their things before going out to question people. She wasn't enjoying spending more time sitting behind a desk than out in the field. She knew exactly why Lisbon was doing it, and she was grateful that her boss was being lenient and not mentioning the rule about not fraternising. But still, she didn't like feeling like the rookie on the team again, always at the top of the list for desk duty.

"Hi, I'm Agent Lisbon and Patrick Jane. We're here about James McCorley"

Lisbon introduced herself to the receptionist, who led them through to the victim's boss, talking about how sad it was.

"Agent Lisbon, Mr Jane, how nice to meet you"

The man they met was well put together and charming. He was dressed in a suit, but without a tie and the top two buttons of his shirt weren't done up. He looked like a typical high flying boss: casual enough to be welcoming and not overly imposing, but smart enough for people to take him seriously.

"I assume you're here about James. What can I do for you?"

"Was he having any problems at work? Any office disputes?" Lisbon asked, shaking the hand he held out.

"Not as far as I'm aware. Everyone liked him, he was good with people"

"He'd have to be in a business like this" Jane commented "You haven't given your condolences, did you not like him? Or simply not care that he's dead?"

"He was one of my best employees. He's been with the firm since the start, it wouldn't be the way it was today without him"

"Yet you didn't like him?" Jane pushed, watching his face carefully.

"We have had a few…disagreements over the years. But I've always liked him. He was hardworking and dedicated" the man affirmed.

Jane narrowed his eyes at him, holding his eye contact. Suddenly he caught a glimpse of the receptionist, who was stood by the door.

"Aha, you were sleeping with him"

He pointed at the receptionist, who crossed her arms and denied it coolly.

"Yes you were. But he broke it off quite recently, which would explain why you were angry at him"

The receptionist rolled her eyes but didn't deny it.

"That's what, 47 seconds?" Jane added to Lisbon, who rolled her eyes at him, but allowed him to continue.

"Linda? Is this true?"

She remained silent, but looked down at the floor as her hand came to hold the necklace around her neck.

"Ok" she said after a few moments "we were sleeping together but that was it. He broke it off two weeks ago, said he wanted to fix his marriage. I was annoyed, but I guess I should have known all along I was nothing special to him. It was clear that it wasn't the first affair he had had"

"Did anyone know about this?" Lisbon pressed.

"No, nobody"

"Right. Get in touch if you think of anything that might be of use" she handed the receptionist her card "thanks for your time"

"That was fast" Lisbon told Jane as they climbed into her car "how did you know it was her?"

"She hung around to listen when she could have left, plus she had a guilty vibe to her"

"Could she have killed him?"

"I doubt it. She was angry at him, yes, but she was still in love with him. She wanted him back with her, not dead"

"She's still a suspect though; I'll have Van Pelt look into her"

"But for now, what do you want for lunch? I fancy Italian"

"I never agreed to your bet!" Lisbon protested.

"Ah I'll pay, but I am hungry. Take the next left, I know a great little Italian down that street"

Lisbon rolled her eyes at him but turned off anyway. She was kind of hungry.

The Italian restaurant they went to was small and a little cramped, but Lisbon decided immediately that she liked the friendly atmosphere there. Jane greeted the owner in Italian, and she couldn't help but laugh when he immediately responded in English.

"So Lisbon" Jane began, tucking into his enormous pizza "What are you going to do about Van Pelt and Rigsby?"

"What about them?"

Lisbon attempted to feign ignorance, concentrated on her own bowl of pasta to avoid Jane's reading of her.

"Don't try and deny it, the whole building knows they're a couple"

"I don't know what you're talking about"

"Yes you do, but I'm glad you're leaving them to it. Hopefully Gable won't say anything about it until I can get the rules changed"

"Why would you want the rules changed?" she pointed out "unless you want to ask Cho out?"

"Ha ha very funny, but it's not for me. They shouldn't have to break up again because of the job"

"Well fair enough, I wish you luck. I thought you would have enjoyed watching them try and hide it too much"

"Ah I've had my fill of that the past four months; I'll be kind to them now"

"Wait four months?" Lisbon paused, a forkful of spaghetti halfway to her mouth "I thought they got together just before Christmas, not months ago!"

"Maybe you need to work on your detective skills a little Lisbon"

She chose to ignore his jibe, they were having a fairly pleasant lunch and she didn't want to ruin it.

"How are you going to get the rules changed anyway?"

"I'm not quite sure yet, I have a few ideas" he said vaguely.

"Are these the sort of ideas that get me in trouble on a daily basis?" she said, glaring at him.

"Have I done anything to get you in trouble the past few weeks?"

She paused and thought about it for a moment, desperately racking her brain for an example. There was nothing. In fact they hadn't been hauled in front of Gable since before Christmas.

"Exactly" he said smugly, watching as she arrived at her conclusion.

"That's what makes me suspicious, it's like you're lying low whilst you come up with some plan that will lose me my job"

"I promise you, no big plan. I've just mellowed a bit. Must have been the Christmas spirit"

He looked her right in the eye as he spoke and she had to look down at her bowl to avoid his intense gaze. She was fairly certain he was referring to their night together, but she wasn't sure why.

"What about this case then? Any ideas?" she said nervously, keen to change the subject.

"Ah a couple" he shrugged "could be the boss, he's clearly a sociopath but I don't yet see his motive"

"Maybe Grace will unearth something in his finances. We should get back to the office soon"

She put her fork down and took a sip of water, whilst Jane continued to eat his way through the enormous pizza. How he managed to eat so much and never get fat was a mystery to her. Especially considering that the most exercise he did was running away from suspects he had annoyed.

"Me scusi" he said to the waiter passing by "Posso avere il resto della mia pizza per andare? E il conto per favora?"

"Si, of course sir"

Lisbon bit back a smile. At least he was trying with his Italian, it had actually sounded quite impressive to her. The bill arrived and the waiter deposited the rest of Jane's pizza into a box. Lisbon let Jane pay; if she had learnt one thing the past seven years, it was that Jane would do what he wanted.

"Boss, I think I've got something" Van Pelt called out, clicking something up on her computer. Lisbon walked over to her desk and looked at the screen over her shoulder.

"The head of the company – Victor Amsted – had been periodically paying in large sums of cash to his personal account each month. It's a different amount each week, but they're normally between 5,000 and 20,000 dollars"

"That's weird"

"Yes, and with those amounts of money why not just switch to bank transfers?"

"Unless you're trying to hide where the money is coming from" Lisbon pointed out "Good work Grace, keep digging. I'll send Cho over to ask him about that"

Lisbon frowned and glanced down at the Tupperware box Van Pelt was eating from as she worked.

"What is that?"

"Tuna salad"

Lisbon wrinkled her nose up, moving swiftly away from the desk whilst Van Pelt looked confusedly at her lunch.

"How did the wife seem?" Jane asked Rigsby suddenly.

"Sad, shocked. You know, normal grieving widow" Rigsby shrugged "she has an alibi though"

"Did she know her husband was having an affair?"

"We didn't tell her. We'd left before we got your call"

"Lisbon, we need to go and talk to the wife" Jane decided.

"But she has an alibi; she was at an opera with a friend all evening. Time of death was 12pm, the opera didn't finish until half 12" Lisbon pointed out.

"What opera was it?"

"Don Giovanni I think"

"Oh of course" Jane muttered under his breath with a smile "come on"

Lisbon relented and followed him out of the bullpen. She didn't trust him to go and see the wife by himself, he had a bad track record of coming back from such occasions with a nosebleed and she didn't quite trust his reformed self yet.


	4. Chapter 4

"CBI, put your hands in the air" Lisbon shouted as the team raced into the victim's bedroom.

The woman jumped sitting on the bed jumped up in shock, standing on Jane's foot by accident.

"I'm arresting you for the murder of James McCorley. Anything you say can be used against you in court…" Lisbon reeled off, cuffing the shocked woman as Jane rubbed his foot, wincing.

"You ok?" Van Pelt asked Jane.

"I'll think I'll live" he joked "we got her though"

"Yup, didn't you say she was innocent?" Van Pelt pointed out, smirking slightly at him.

"I just risked my life to catch your killer and this is the thanks I get?"

"We were waiting outside the door all along" Van Pelt reminded him, rolling her eyes "come on, I'll drive you back. I'm sure there's an ice pack somewhere at the office"

An hour later Lisbon returned to the CBI to find Jane lying on the couch in her office, with an ice pack resting on his right foot.

"The case is all wrapped up, I was just about to order pizza" she told him "how's your foot?"

"I have a nice stiletto shaped bruise on it. But hey, a dangerous killer is no longer out on the loose" he shrugged.

"Will you be able to drive home with that?"

"I'll just stay here; I forget how comfortable your couch is sometimes" he mused "Not quite the same as mine, but it'll do for the night"

He grinned at her, a smile that was ever so slightly cheeky and mysterious. Lisbon felt her cheeks colouring a little as she remembered the time he had spent the night on her couch in her apartment, and hoping that his smile didn't mean that he was thinking about the same thing. The continued intensity of his gaze only made her blush more, leaving her with little doubt about what was on his mind.

"Did you want pizza?" she blurted out suddenly, forcing them both back to the present.

"When have I ever refused case closed pizza? I thought you knew me Lisbon"

Jane's grin widened, and the blush which had been slowly receding from Lisbon's cheeks returned with ferocity. There was something about the way he was smiling at her that made her feel like he was looking right into her soul. She was used to feeling like he was reading her mind (he did it on a daily basis, after all), but she hadn't felt so…vulnerable for a while. Well, not since that fated Christmas dinner in fact. Despite the quantities of alcohol consumed, she could still remember what had happened that evening in quite a lot of detail. In particular, she knew that the cheeky grin on his face right that moment was exactly the same one that he had worn as he had undone her bra. And…well, she knew where that had gone.

"Ok, I'll…order an extra one then" she turned and left her office quickly.

She stood outside her office for a few moments, contemplating what had just happened. She wasn't sure why this sudden sexual tension had appeared between them after weeks of increased normalness, but she definitely knew that was a bad thing. Aside from the potential damage to their friendship, it was completely unprofessional to be thinking about such things at work. She was a homicide detective; she should be out catching killers, not fantasizing about her consultant. And his hands…and the look on his face as he entered her…and the feeling of him moving deep inside her…

 _Stop it Teresa!_ She chastised herself. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and called the local pizza company, determined to take her mind off Jane. Anyway, she had no proof that he had even known what she was thinking about. He'd just been smiling, like he did from time to time. She'd just gone and assumed that his mind was on the same track as hers, maybe he was genuinely just thinking about how comfortable her couch was, and how much he enjoyed pizza.

Jane however, was most definitely thinking about more than couches and pizza. He was frustrated at himself. He had been trying so hard to move on from that night, so that she could see how much he loved her as a person, and then he'd gone and done that. He would be kidding himself if he pretended that she had thought nothing of it. He had seen how red her face had gone, and he had enjoyed the knowledge that she was thinking about him _like that_. But he'd also watched how she had become flustered and rushed away. That had hurt. It reminded him of their talk where she had called the night a 'mistake' and wanted to forget all about it. After agreeing with her by accident then, he had been determined to be more honest in his actions and to show her that it was never a 'mistake' to him. Making her feel uncomfortable by reminding her of it only reiterated her thoughts of it meaning nothing to him. Jane knew how Lisbon thought; he knew she would have taken his flirty smile as a means of embarrassment rather than a flirtatious gesture. Not that he blamed her for that; that was exactly how it had looked. Ignoring the shooting pain in his foot as he placed it on the floor, Jane stood up from the couch and stretched, before making his way to the bullpen. They had closed a case after all, he should go and celebrate with the team and put all inappropriate thoughts of Lisbon behind for a bit. If he could, anyway.

Two weeks later, and thankfully Lisbon had not had any more embarrassing encounters with Jane. Their banter was still its slightly flirty self, but without the suggestiveness that had appeared that evening in her office. That didn't mean to say that Lisbon had stopped thinking about it by any means. In fact, it seemed to have got worse. He had started appearing in her dreams at night, something which was making her feel particularly uncomfortable. It was one thing to drift off into a reverie of happy memories out of choice, but to have them appear in her subconscious made her feel very out of control. She blamed it on the fact that he had been the first man she had slept with for about 3 years, and therefore it was entirely natural for her mind to cling onto that encounter as the only sexual contact it could properly remember. But deep down she knew that this wasn't the truth. Why else could she remember little things about him in such detail? Like the way he had looked into her eyes as he had slid himself inside her, with such burning intensity she had been unable to move for a moment. Then the sensation and the realisation that she was actually having sex with Patrick Jane had overwhelmed her and she had broken their eye contact and turned to kissing him instead. Or maybe he had just zoned out because of the alcohol and had caught her eye whilst trying to concentrate on _other things_. Maybe she was attaching too much meaning to it. He had made it clear that he was happy to forget about it, she was just getting her hopes up by imagining that it had actually meant something to him.

A frustrated groan escaped her mouth and she let her head flop onto the paperwork. It was so distracting, the way he crept into her thoughts all the time when she was trying to work.

"Boss?"

Cho stuck his head around the door, hiding any surprise at finding that Lisbon had face-planted her paperwork.

"We caught a case"

"Ok, brief me on the way" she responded wearily, forcing herself to her feet.

"Rigsby and Van Pelt are already heading over there, they happened to be in the neighbourhood over lunch"

 _Of course they did_ Lisbon thought to herself. It was no secret that every time Rigsby and Van Pelt went out to buy lunch that they just so happened to end up in the same place. Lisbon had been unlucky enough to walk into a random café for a sandwich to spot the two of them bumping into one another by accident. Tongues and all.

"Jane, we have a case" she told him as her and Cho passed through the bullpen.

He was sitting on his couch, sipping tea from his favourite blue cup and staring thoughtfully into the middle distance.

"Oh right. Can I finish my tea first?"

"Can't you just pour it into a travel mug?"

"Tea from a travel mug Lisbon" he shook his head at her "what an abomination"

She rolled her eyes at him as he admitted defeat and stood up, gulping down as much tea as he could.

They arrived at the crime scene not long after, and Lisbon spotted a small smile creeping onto Jane's lips at the setting - a psychic's office.

"Please try to contain yourself, Jane" she warned him as they walked up to the front door.

"When have I ever had any trouble containing myself?" he shot back.

Lisbon bit back a highly inappropriate retort, and settled with a small glare.

They were greeted by a tall, middle aged woman with greying hair at the door. She was draped in scarves and fabrics of all different colours, and Lisbon avoided looking at Jane, knowing exactly what he was thinking.

"Welcome"

Her voice was surprisingly deep and quite breathy.

"I'm Rhonda, John's spiritual advisor" she explained, pulling a hanky out of her sleeve and dabbing her eyes theatrically "please, come in"

"When did you discover the victim?" Lisbon asked as they followed her through to the crime scene.

"This morning, I had just come back from my sun salutations. I do them every morning in the park"

"What time was that?"

"Oh, I try to avoid measuring time in minutes. It's so very confining"

 _And convenient for if you don't have a solid alibi,_ Lisbon couldn't help but think. They met the local PD officer in the room where the victim had been found. He briefed them on what they knew so far, whilst Rhona started muttering things to the corpse and spraying a perfume around the room.

"Would you mind not spraying that? It might disturb the crime scene" Lisbon asked politely after receiving a face full of lavender mist.

"Oh of course. I'm so sorry. I didn't want any of your souls to be tainted by the negative energy" she gave a sad look to the body on the floor, sniffing slightly.

Lisbon forced herself not to roll her eyes, whilst Jane decided it was time to take action.

"Is this where you meet clients?" Jane asked.

"Yes, I find the barrier between our world and others is at its lowest here"

"I could feel that when I walked in, it has such a…freeing atmosphere"

Jane closed his eyes and took a deep breath through his nose.

"Yes, it does" she agreed slowly. She stared at him in wonder for a few moments, as he remained standing peacefully with his eyes shut.

"You have a very strong aura" she told him "if you just opened yourself up, you could let your gift free"

"I did used to" he admitted, looking at the ground as if it was a very difficult topic for him "But I learnt that my gift is better…contained"

He shot Lisbon a look as he echoed her earlier words.

"Yes, I can see now…I'm so very sorry. But that doesn't mean you have to lock it up" she muttered, placing a hand on his arm.

"Jane, any insights?" Lisbon asked "You know, on the case?"

"Well he wasn't killed here, judging by the lack of blood. Carried in by two or more people, given that there are no drag marks"

"Anything that forensics won't be able to pick up on?" she pushed.

"He was happily married, couldn't have children but they had a dog instead…a Labrador if I'm not mistaken?"

He pointed to the dark hairs that were caught on the knee of the victim's trousers.

"You're right" Rhonda said, nodding "he first started seeing me when they couldn't conceive. Mr Jane, your gift is there, whether you want to accept it not"

"Ok, Jane we're done here. Let's go"

Lisbon was eager to get Jane away before Rhonda had any more chance to mention his 'gift'. Jane took both of Rhonda's hands in his and looked into her eyes for a moment.

"Do you think John will make contact with you?"

"I…I don't know, it can take a while for spirits to pass through. But I will keep trying, and I'll contact you if I do"

"Thank you" he said, bowing his head respectfully.

"Ok, what was that all about?" Lisbon asked Jane as she pulled away from the drive.

"All what?"

"You! Not making fun of her, pretending to feel the 'energy' in the room" she explained.

"I was trying to see if she was bluffing"

"And?"

"Completely crazy. And completely innocent. She genuinely believes everything she's saying"

"She's still a suspect; the body was found in her house, and sun salutations don't exactly count as an alibi"

"Yes, someone is obviously trying to put this on her, but she didn't do it" he affirmed.

"How can you be so sure?"

"I just am; I know what physics are like. Invite her to join the investigation if you want to be certain" he shrugged.

"Yeah right, like we did with Kristina?"

Jane didn't say anything in response, and Lisbon immediately felt guilty for reminding him.

"Sorry…I shouldn't have mentioned that" she said quietly.

"It's ok. It could be quite fun to have her on the investigation though, don't you want a free snapshot of your future?" he joked.

"I'm quite happy not knowing right now"

"Really Lisbon? You don't want to know who your handsome future husband is?"

"Or wife" she pointed out "you never know"

"Oh, I do" he muttered under his breath, just loud enough for Lisbon to hear.

"But really, if there's any chance she could be the killer – although she's definitely not – would it not be better to have her under our noses?" he continued quickly, determined not to head down the same path as he had done a few weeks ago.

"I'll consider it. You just like being told how special you are with your 'gift'"

"Well, I am very special"

"Here, chamomile tea" Jane told Rhonda, placing a cup in front of where she sat at the desk in Lisbon's office "has he tried to contact you again yet?"

"No, not yet" Rhonda said, sighing deeply.

Lisbon looked across the office and rolled her eyes at Jane, who shrugged and offered her a small smile. The three remained in silence for a few minutes, save for Rhonda's occasional sips of tea.

"Jane, we've got a _solid_ lead on the case" Lisbon told him, having just received an email from Van Pelt about the victim's bank account "Rhonda, do you mind if we leave?"

"No, of course not. I have a client to see anyway, her brother is trying to get through to her" she sighed deeply. Clearly contacting the dead was a very tiring pastime.

"Of course, thanks for your help"

"It's the least I can do" she stood up and rearranged her many scarves.

"Bye Rhonda" Jane said as she left "please, call me if you have any contact or insights"

"Of course"

"Seriously Jane, why are you still going along with her?" Lisbon asked the moment Rhonda had left.

"Why not? She's happy in her little world"

"Because normally you love telling people that they're wrong" she pointed out, grabbing her bag and keys.

"Not when they really believe in something"

"But-"

"Have I ever tried to tell you that your religion is wrong?"

"Well no, but-"

"Exactly, because I know that you believe in it and I respect that, regardless of my own beliefs"

Lisbon had nothing to say back to that, realising that not once had he ever tried to disprove her religion. She also felt slightly guilty for being so disparaging of Rhonda, who (if Jane was right – as he was the vast majority of the time) genuinely believed that she could contact dead people and wasn't putting it on to con people.

"What makes her psychic beliefs different to others we've come across then?" she asked as they crossed the bullpen, heading towards the lift.

"I saw how much she charges people. It would be a fairly pointless con if she was only earning as much as a waitress"

"Still, doesn't it seem a bit odd for her to be charging people at all?"

"Look at it this way: she's charging enough to get by so that she can bring peace to as many people's lives as possible. She would probably rather not charge at all, but she has little choice if she wants to have enough to live off and still be able to help people. She's even got a scarf business going along the side to bring in income"

Again, Lisbon was lost for words. It was so unlike Jane; normally he was convinced that all psychics were frauds and spent all of his time with them trying to pull them up on it. This time he had decided in a matter of seconds that this woman actually believed what she was saying (even if he was still convinced it was rubbish), and was perfectly content just to leave her to it, even going along with her to a degree. Maybe he'd had a change of heart, as if he'd mellowed a bit since the whole Red John business was over and he was no longer controlled by guilt and revenge. Whatever it was, her job was a whole lot easier when she wasn't constantly trying to stop him offending people, or filling in paperwork for the times she had failed.

To Lisbon's relief, they managed to solve the case fairly quickly. She didn't think she could take much more of Jane's passivity towards Rhonda and her beliefs. As much as she knew he had good intentions, it was too _weird_ to watch when she was so used to his attempts to prove all psychics were frauds. They hadn't been assigned a new case yet, so Lisbon had spent most of the past few days going through paperwork and looking into cold cases with the team. Although she didn't want wish death onto someone, she wouldn't have minded catching a new case sometime soon, but for now all Lisbon wanted to do was go home and get an early night for a change.

"Bye Grace" Lisbon called as she left. Rigsby and Cho appeared to have already gone home, and Jane seemed to be fast asleep on his couch "see you tomorrow"

"Bye boss. Isn't it Saturday tomorrow? Are we working then?"

"Is it?" Lisbon frowned in confusion, convinced it was a Wednesday.

"Yes, definitely" Van Pelt said, checking her computer to be sure.

"Well see you on Monday then"

Once in her car, Lisbon pondered her confusion, deciding that the lack of a case was having a detrimental effect on her concentration.

 _Shit._

If it was Friday today, then it had been a whole 5 days since she had finished her last contraceptive pill pack. It hadn't worried her that her period hadn't come after 3 days, since it normally took a few pill free days for it to arrive, but knowing it had actually been 5 days was a different story. Maybe it was taking longer because she had run two packs together, meaning that she hadn't had a break in pills for six weeks instead of the three which her body was used to. Lisbon decided to console herself with this thought, determined not to even think of the alternatives. In fact, there couldn't even be any alternatives, since she took her pill at 8am every day which made them 99+% effective. Her period would probably come tomorrow, right in the middle of her morning run or at some other inconvenient time, she told herself. There was nothing to worry about. She was sure she could remember the doctor telling her that occasionally people just didn't get periods between packs. Maybe that was what was happening, and as per usual her mind jumped to the worst conclusion.

Still, all weekend she couldn't shake the worry that that wasn't the case. She also couldn't bring herself to get a pregnancy test to prove it wrong, just in case that tiny niggling worry was right. So she tried to push her worry away through exercise, running twice the distance she normally did on Saturday morning and even getting up early to run before church on Sunday. She spent the rest of her time catching up on errands, finally getting round to ringing her brothers, and going shopping (something she normally dreaded) for a couple of new work shirts.

On Monday morning she had woken up suddenly at 5am and rushed to the bathroom desperately hoping to find that her period had appeared overnight. It hadn't. Now worried that a whole week had passed and unable to get back to sleep, Lisbon left for work early and stopped at her favourite café on the way for a leisurely breakfast of coffee and a muffin. As soon as she arrived at work she realised a potential problem; she would have to see Jane, who would almost definitely work out something was up right away. Still, at least she could bury herself in paperwork and pretend to be coming down with something until they had a new case to take her mind off it. Or until she did a pregnancy test which would come out negative, and then she'd be certain that everything was fine.

From the safety of her office she watched Jane saunter in, looking slightly too cheerful for 8am on a Monday morning. She was glad that he had finally got rid of that motel room and bought himself a proper apartment, even if she kind of missed coming in to find him asleep on his couch, as she used to most mornings. Over the next half hour the rest of her team filtered in, Rigsby and Van Pelt sharing smiles which strongly suggested that they'd spent the weekend together. Lisbon suppressed a sigh; she really needed to talk to Jane and work out what his plan was for changing the fraternising rule. She was even willing to help him with it, so long as it didn't result in her losing her job. She watched with a small smile on her face as he made himself a cup of tea, concentrating carefully as he dunked the teabag in to make sure it was the perfect strength. Then he looked over and spotted that her watching him and grinned, before grabbing a mug to make her a coffee.

"Morning Lisbon" Jane greeted her as he entered her office. He'd had to use his back to push the door open whilst trying not to spill either of the drinks he carried.

"Why are you in such a good mood this morning?" she asked, taking her coffee and relishing in the rich scent that emanated from it.

"Why not?" he shrugged.

"Because it's a drizzly Monday morning and I'd rather be in my bed"

"Ah…so you didn't sleep well?"

Jane had noticed the slightly dark circles under her eyes and her fatigued posture. She chose not to respond to his question, sipping at her coffee instead whilst he settled himself on her couch.

"Jane" she began cautiously "did you ever come up with a plan to get rid of that fraternising rule?"

"Do you want to ask Cho out now?" he joked.

"No" she rolled her eyes at him "Rigsby and Van Pelt. I don't know why Gable hasn't mentioned it to me yet, it's so obvious"

"As a matter of fact, I have already started putting my plan into action"

"Why don't I like the sound of this?"

"Really, it's nothing bad. I just slipped a couple of things into conversation with him. Phase 2 is coming up soon, which you can help with"

"What's 'Phase 2'?" She narrowed her eyes at him.

"Calm down, it won't get you fired. We just need to send in a few of those anonymous request forms, nothing risky"

Lisbon spent a moment struggling to pick a hole in his plan. She found none. It was almost _conventional_.

"Fine, I'll help you with that"

"Brilliant" he grinned widely "Now what is it that's bothering you? There's clearly something up"

"Nothing, I'm just tired" she shrugged, followed by a timely yawn.

"If you say so"

Jane looked less than convinced but decided to let it go. Part of his new plan regarding Lisbon involved leaving of things that she didn't want to talk about, instead of forcing them out of her. As much as he wanted to know what was worrying her, he would have to let it go for now. What he did know, was that it wasn't a lack of sleep. When Lisbon was tired, she became snappy and grumpy, not slightly lost looking like she was now.

They finally caught a case around mid-morning, by which point Lisbon was on the edge of running down the shop across the road to buy a pregnancy test and dispel her fears. Instead of that, she ended up driving with Jane to the edge of town, where they found the body of a woman who should have been in witness protection. Five minutes on the scene convinced Jane that this was a consequence of the case for which she was testifying, but that it wasn't the defendant who had killed her. They headed back to the office not long after, and after an internal battle which lasted the duration of the journey, Lisbon had decided to bite the bullet and go for it.

"I'm just going to go and get some aspirin from the shop" Lisbon told Jane as they left the car.

"Don't they have that in the first aid box in the kitchen?"

"I need more anyway, I might as well get it now" she lied "see you in a minute"

She felt slightly embarrassed going to the counter to buy her pregnancy test, so she grabbed a couple of bars of chocolate with it, hoping that maybe the cashier wouldn't even register what it was. Thankfully the young girl on duty seemed too busy texting between transactions to notice much. Just as she approached the desk, she suddenly remembered her pretence for being there and picked up a couple of boxes of aspirin. It wouldn't do for her not to have any on the off chance that anyone needed to borrow some, and Jane was bound to notice.

As soon as she got back to the CBI building, she went straight into the toilets on the ground floor. Since most of the offices were on higher floors, she knew that the chances of finding herself alone there were much better. Plus, she couldn't face the idea of bumping into Van Pelt in this situation.

The wait for the result was excruciating. Lisbon tried to reason with herself; this was nothing compared to some of the situations she'd found herself in before. She'd been taken hostage by that crazy woman who had kidnapped Jane and tried to set fire to them; she'd had guns pointed at her, or even held against her head. But none of that seemed as tense as these three minutes. In those situations, she could have very easily just been killed, but she wouldn't have had to deal with the consequences. This was different; the result of this test would determine the consequences, and therefore the rest of her life.

She tried to tell herself that the result would be positive. Although it would be scary and new and very different, she knew deep down that she had always wanted children at some point, and even if this wasn't her ideal situation, at least she would end up with something that would inevitably outweigh all of the difficulties it brought with it. The image of a newborn baby lying asleep in Jane's arms suddenly popped into her head, along with an involuntary smile.

She fought back the urge to look at the result, and turned her mind to the other possibility; negative. Her life would be able to carry on like normal, with her career and her friendship with Jane. Sure, now she'd had the possibility of a child it wouldn't seem quite the same, but this way she would be able to find someone to marry and have her child with, so that her child of the future could grow up in a loving and secure environment, not with an overworked single mother.

She decided that this conundrum was God's way of punishing her for sleeping with Jane, and she couldn't entirely blame him (or her). It had brought home quite what a stupid thing she'd done, and she knew for sure that she would never get herself in that situation again. She'd learnt her lesson – not just from the awkwardness and tension that followed, but now from the worry that she may have left that night with more than just emotional baggage.

With a sigh she glanced at her watch. Five minutes had now passed, and the packet had only said two or three. It was time. She reached out a shaking hand and picked up the plastic stick. It took two deep breaths before she managed to turn it towards her and look at the result. Unfortunately, in her panic and stress before taking it she hadn't bothered to work out what the result would mean. This was only the second pregnancy test she'd ever taken (the previous when she was in college, where it had very clearly stated 'not pregnant'), and therefore the small thin lines meant nothing to her. She picked up the box from her lap and tried to read it, finding it very difficult for her eyes to focus on the words. Then she found it, and her eyes flickered between the test and the box for a few moments, comprehending what she now saw.

"No" she muttered, feeling the tears prickling behind her eyelids.

The test dropped to the floor and she stared at it in confusion for a bit, before grabbing it and shoving it in the bin alongside the box. She looked at the ceiling and fanned her face with her hand, rapidly blinking away the moisture from her eyes. When she felt like she had control of herself again, she left the cubicle and washed her hands, before taking the lift up to the Serious Crimes floor, her mind still replaying the past few minutes.


	5. Chapter 5

Lisbon didn't remember any of the walk from the ground floor toilets to her office. She had taken the stairs, so as to avoid having to awkwardly chat to any colleagues in the elevator. Once in the safety of her office, she sunk down into her chair and contemplated the magnitude of what she had just discovered.

 _Pregnant. She was pregnant._

It didn't seem real. If she hadn't reread that same section of the instructions several times, she would have been certain that she had made a mistake. In fact, there was still a very large part of her that was convinced that the test had malfunctioned, but she couldn't face returning to the shop and going through the whole stressful process all over again. She was so lost in her panicked thoughts that she didn't notice Jane push her office door open and step in.

"I've made you some tea" he said, holding out a cup "you shouldn't have coffee"

 _He knew? How did he know_? She knew he was good – very good – but she had only known for about 5 minutes, could he really have worked it out that quickly?

"Because of your headache" he explained, noticing her confused expression.

 _Oh that, thank god._ Her relief was short-lived however, because she very quickly realised a whole new problem; she _would_ have to tell him. Aside from the fact that he was her friend and colleague, it was also his child, and therefore he deserved to know before anyone else. That meant that she couldn't leave him to find out through other people, or when it became obvious. She would have to sit him down and tell him properly.

But not yet.

Would he even want anything to do with it? Would the prospect of bringing up any child be too painful after what had happened to Charlotte? Her fear increased, as her brain leapt ahead and contemplated the fact that this could create an enormous and unfixable rift between them. What if he found it too painful to even spend time with her? She couldn't cope with the thought of having to bring up a child alone and losing her best friend at the same time.

"You ok Lisbon? You're not saying much"

Jane's voice cut through her thoughts and forced her back to the present.

"Uh yeah, I think I'm coming down with something" she shrugged, taking a sip of the tea but tasting nothing.

Normally Lisbon wasn't one to admit defeat to illness, but for once she was grateful for it to act as a distraction from what was actually happening.

"Right, I'll stay far away from you then" he joked.

Lisbon smiled half-heartedly, knowing the irony in the fact that she would never have found herself in this situation had he done that in the first place.

"Um boss" Rigsby stuck his head through the open door "we've been looking into the man the victim was testifying against. Apparently he hasn't had contact with anyone outside of the prison for 2 weeks. Do you want me and Cho to go and check him out?"

"No" she sighed "I'll go. You talk to the family"

She needed to work. Spending the day worrying in her office was going to get her nowhere.

"I'll come too. Nothing like a nice trip to the local high security prison" Jane said, grinning.

Lisbon wasn't sure whether to be grateful or worried about Jane coming with her. He could be a great source of distraction if he worked out that she needed to take her mind off something, just as long as he didn't manage to work out what that _something_ was.

It was definitely grateful. Jane had turned out to be a brilliant companion for the trip to the prison. Not only had he managed to work out that the man had absolutely nothing to do with the murder (in fact he hadn't even known, his shock when they told him of it was genuine), but he had chatted away for the whole journey about the most random pieces of information, managing to take her mind off her worries for a bit. She could tell he knew something was up from the way he glanced at her in the few moments of silence, but thankfully he didn't say anything about it. Maybe he was scared about her getting angry at him for trying to read her mind, or maybe he had already worked out what was wrong. She desperately hoped it was the former.

In those few moments of silence, Lisbon had managed to decide on two things. Firstly, that she needed a doctor's appointment as soon as possible (she wouldn't be truly convinced until she heard the truth from a medical professional, not just a couple of lines on a plastic stick), and secondly, that she would mention nothing to Jane until after having seen the doctor. Having had a bit of time to think about it, and knowing that she had a plan of action, she was feeling a lot calmer. She would put aside both her worries and excitement until she had been to the doctor, and focus on solving this case.

As soon as she got back to her office, Lisbon closed the door and called her doctors. The earliest appointment they could give her was Friday. Today was Monday, which meant four whole days of not being able to act on a pregnancy confirmation. Still, there was nothing she could do about that but throw herself into her work (and somehow survive without caffeinated coffee).

She then made herself leave the safety of her office and head to the bullpen, determined to act as the Serious Crime Special Agent she was.

"Cho; did you get anything from the family?"

"We're looking into them for any possible motives, but they didn't seem to be hiding anything" Cho reported, stoic as ever.

"The mother did mention something about a boyfriend though, Van Pelt is on it" Rigsby added.

"Ok, also have a look into anyone who might not want Watkins going to prison. Jane is sure that he wasn't involved, but see if you can find anyone else who might benefit from his freedom. Without the victim's testimony, the case is very thin"

"Find out if Watkins has a girlfriend" Jane added, coming to stand beside Lisbon.

Lisbon tried not to let his proximity affect her, but couldn't help the involuntary shiver that occurred as his arm brushed hers.

"Boss, I've found the boyfriend" Van Pelt called over from her desk, and the whole team crowded round her "He's been arrested twice for attempted burglary, and once for indecent exposure, but was never charged"

"Indecent exposure, lovely" Jane muttered.

"Why wasn't he charged?" Lisbon asked, ignoring Jane.

"Insufficient evidence"

"Ok, take Jane and go and talk to him"

"Ok, thanks Boss"

Van Pelt shot Lisbon a grateful look for sending her out into the field, whilst the rest team dispersed to carry on with their work. After a moment of thought, Lisbon called after Van Pelt.

"Actually I'm coming too. But you can take the lead"

She couldn't face the idea of sitting alone in her office all afternoon, even if she probably did have work that needed doing. Van Pelt looked a little disappointed for a moment, but quickly hid it.

They arrived at the boyfriend's house and Van Pelt knocked on the door. Nobody answered, but Jane noticed a sudden movement from a window. This was quickly followed by muffled bang from around the back of the house, causing Lisbon and Van Pelt to race around the side, guns drawn, whilst Jane hid behind the hedge. Lisbon peered around the corner, her eyes searching the overgrown greenery for any sign of movement. She caught sight of something dark tucked behind a small bush.

"Cover me" she whispered to Van Pelt, who nodded, before running to stand behind the shed beside the bush.

The dark something turned out to be a navy jacket that had been thrown over the bush. Signalling to Van Pelt that it was safe to come out, Lisbon relaxed her gun arm and inspected the jacket.

"He could have gone in any direction" Van Pelt said, looking around at all the possible escape routes.

"Jane" Lisbon called "it's safe to come out now. He's gone"

Jane's blond head appeared cautiously around the corner, checking if it really was safe. Lisbon smiled and shook her head at him, beckoning him over to where she and Van Pelt stood.

"Oh" Jane said, spotting the jacket.

"Yes, oh" Lisbon agreed.

"Well he wasn't the killer anyway; he's obviously run because he thought you'd discovered something else. Probably credit card fraud this time"

"Could you not have told us that before we came after him?"

"You would still have come"

Lisbon didn't answer. They both knew it was true.

"What was the noise?" Jane asked.

"The back door shutting? I don't see any reason for gunshots; they would only draw attention to him" Van Pelt suggested.

"Unless he wanted to draw our attention away from the front"

As if in response to Jane's statement, they heard a car reversing rapidly and driving off from the front of the house. The three of them raced back round to the front, just to glimpse the car disappear around the corner.

"Great, so we've just lost a suspect" Lisbon muttered. Her day could not get much worse.

"He's not a suspect" Jane reminded her.

"He could still know something"

"And we haven't lost him" Jane continued "I remember his plate, I'm sure you can use your computer skills to find him, Grace"

"I'll ring Rigsby and get him to put a BOLO out on him" Van Pelt said, pulling her phone out of her pocket. Lisbon caught sight of her background picture, a photo of her and Rigsby smiling with their arms around each other, but said nothing.

Watching Van Pelt and Rigsby, even with their covert relationship, made her feel alone and slightly nostalgic. Greg had been her only 'real' relationship, and she had ended that over 15 years ago. Since then she'd been on a few dates, but nothing that had ever lasted more than 3 or 4 rendezvous, in which time she tended to find something particularly irritating about them anyway. She was so busy with her job most of the time that she didn't have the energy to keep a proper relationship going, so settled for the occasional dinner and maybe a one night stand. She'd come to accept that she may never get married, or even have another long term relationship, and had always assumed that she would just buy a dog to keep her company in her old age. At least you could train the annoying habits out of them fairly easily. Still, it would have been nice to have someone for moral support right now.

"…and then we'll call ET and see if he wants to meet us for dinner on the Death Star…"

Lisbon frowned, the realisation that Jane was talking to her distracting her from her thoughts.

"What?"

"Aha" a grin filled Jane's face "I knew you weren't listening"

"Sorry. What were you saying?"

"Ah nothing, I was just solving the case. And planning an intergalactic meet-up"

"You know who the killer is?" Lisbon frowned at him.

"Nearly, I'll tell you tomorrow though"

"Why can't I know now?"

"Because there's something I need to check out first. And you need to go home and get some sleep"

"I don't need sleep, I'm fine" she tried to convince him "and I have a suspect to find; he's not getting away from me a second time"

The rest of the team had gone home, leaving Jane alone on his couch in deep thought. Something was most definitely up with Lisbon. He hadn't seen her looking so lost and worried since being framed for murder by her shrink, and at least then she had confided in him. Her attempts to pass this off as 'going down with something' didn't fool anyone and Jane knew perfectly well that there was something going on, but he was struggling put his finger on what exactly it was.

He assumed that it was nothing to do to work since he'd heard no rumours, nor had she complained about anything work related to him recently (well, other than the never ending paperwork). He was fairly certain too, that she had no romantic relationship at the moment either, and Lisbon definitely wasn't the type of person to get herself in a state over a man.

So he was left with what? Family, friends, health…

It could be something to do with her brothers. He knew she worried about them; it was entirely plausible that one of them was having trouble with something and she had found out. Or it could be something to do with one of her few friends outside of work, but he doubted that Lisbon would let herself become _this_ distracted over it. Jane also discounted health quite quickly, since the only signs she showed of being ill were the slight paleness and headache that day, both side effects of being stressed.

Family it was then. One of her brothers could have got into some sort of trouble with the law and asked his cop sister to help him out. That would definitely cause her a lot of distress, forcing her to choose between two very important things: justice and family. It was also something that she wouldn't mention to him.

He hoped that it would all sort itself out soon; he didn't like it when Lisbon wasn't happy, but at least now he had a fairly good idea of what was wrong. Months ago he would have been tempted to force it out of her and then work out a way to fix it, but he knew that that wasn't fair to her. If she wanted to tell him and ask for help then she would, and if not, she was perfectly at liberty to keep her family affairs private, even from her best friend. He would just carry on finding ways to distract her and cheer her up in the meantime. There was little he liked more than managing to turn Lisbon's concerned and tense expression into a genuine smile, as he'd managed to do earlier on the way back from the prison.

Jane felt more content now he had had a chance to think things through and work out what was going on, and decided that he might as well go home and get some sleep. He had a plan to catch their killer to implement the next day, and if anything went wrong then he may need the energy to run away from a potentially dangerous situation.

Lisbon did not arrive home feeling quite so content. It was one of those days where she could really have done with a large glass of wine and a feel-good film to take her mind off everything. Obviously the wine wasn't an option (not that she had been able to bring herself to drink any after that fated night anyway), but she stopped on the way home to pick up a large tub of 'cookies 'n cream' ice cream and a ready made lasagne for dinner, and then a large bar of chocolate for good measure.

After the initial shock and panic of finding out that she was pregnant wore off, she was feeling sort of numb. Even explaining it to the doctor over the phone had felt like she was talking about someone else; her life consisted of looking at dead bodies and chasing killers, not bringing up a child and changing diapers and driving to and from day-care. And although she had always liked children (and that was after having to bring up three younger brothers), she had assumed that actually having her own was something she wouldn't think about until she was married. But apparently it wasn't going to work out quite how she had planned.

She tried to be angry at Jane for finding herself in this situation, but she couldn't quite bring herself to do so. She knew that it wasn't his fault; they had both been there that night, and it was just extraordinary bad luck that this was the outcome. S _he_ had been the one to initiate the whole debacle by inviting him in (and a tiny part of her had been hoping for something to happen), not him.

With a loud sigh she sunk down into her sofa to wait for her lasagne to cook. She didn't feel particularly hungry, but all she'd had to eat that day was a sandwich and a lack of food probably wasn't helping her mood. She picked up the remote and flicked on the TV, scrolling through the channels to try and find something mindless to watch. She settled on quiz show, trying to hold back the thought that Jane probably knew the answers to all the questions. She was tempted to ring him as a distraction, but she knew that he would come over to try and cheer her up, and having him back in her apartment when she was feeling so not herself was most definitely not a good idea. Plus, he would try to work out what was wrong, and in this emotionally exhausted state she was worried she might tell him. Thankfully the oven timer sounded from the kitchen, and Lisbon was able to busy herself with plating up her food and finding a handful of salad in the fridge to go with it.

After a small helping of lasagne, Lisbon found that she was feeling a bit better. She dug some ice cream into a bowl and snuggled on the sofa with a blanket wrapped around her, knowing that the distraction of the TV would most likely lull her to sleep soon enough. She didn't mind spending the night on her sofa; the idea of the silence in her room with nothing to distract her from her worrisome thoughts wasn't entirely appealing. She managed to doze off into an uneasy sleep half an hour later, with half a bowl of melting ice cream left on the coffee table in front of her, and a soap opera playing on the TV.

The next three days passed in a flash, and before Lisbon knew it Friday morning had arrived and she found herself sitting nervously in the Doctors' waiting room. They were running behind, and her nerves increased with every minute that passed. The elderly woman next to her was coughing loudly every few seconds, and Lisbon shot her a sympathetic smile before hiding behind a magazine she found on the seat beside her. She really didn't want to be ill as well as pregnant. Finally, her name appeared on the board with a loud beep and she stood up, trying her hardest to remember the breathing exercises that Jane had tried to teach her.

Thankfully the doctor turned out to be a smiley middle aged woman, who explained everything in a calm, gentle voice. She confirmed that she was 7 weeks pregnant, and talked her through some of the symptoms that might arise shortly. Lisbon felt gradually calmer as the consultation continued; people had babies every day, many of which were not planned, and they survived just fine. Then the doctor mentioned something about her partner, and Lisbon froze.

"We're not…well we're not together" she explained awkwardly.

"Oh that's quite alright; we're quite familiar with that sort of situation" she smiled widely at Lisbon, who tried to push away the feeling that she was judging her "Will he be involved at all?"

"I haven't told him yet, it's a…a difficult situation. We're colleagues" she tried to explain.

"Will you be telling him before the next appointment? We try to encourage the father to be involved as much as possible, right from the start"

"I…yes. Well I hope so. It's just…" Lisbon paused and took a breath "he lost a child -before - I don't know if…"

"Ah I see" the doctor smiled yet again, a little sympathetically "well aside from encouraging you to bring him, that's all for now. Do you have any questions?"

"Um, how did it happen? Me being pregnant I mean" Lisbon asked nervously.

"How-"

"I took the pill at the same time every day, I had sex once…"

"As unlikely as it is, these things happen" she shrugged "it's rare, but you're not the first. Were you sick at all around the time of conception? Or took any antibiotics?"

Lisbon thought back to the week leading up to Christmas. She definitely hadn't had antibiotics, and she hadn't been ill, but…she had thrown a couple of times after eating some off chicken by accident. Two days before the team dinner. _Oh._ How had she forgotten that? She'd read the information booklet the pills came with back to back, how did she manage to forget that slightly vital piece of information?

The doctor seemed to notice Lisbon's realisation and didn't push her for answers. Instead, she handed her a leaflet filled with information and photos of happy parents with their children, before wishing her a good day and showing her out.

Lisbon left her office in a daze, and somehow managed to make her way back to her car whilst trying to flick through the leaflet. It still didn't seem real. She had assumed that sitting in a room with a subtle scent of disinfectant and listening to someone with a serious expression and a stethoscope would make it real, but it just didn't. She touched her stomach absentmindedly. It felt flat and empty, not at all like there was a baby (well foetus so far) growing inside her. She looked down at the leaflet in her hand again. She couldn't imagine herself as one of those happy mothers, which was weird because her mind had had no problem coming up with an image of Jane as smiling father. She tried looking at a photo of a baby. Again, nothing. She sighed and shoved the leaflet in the bottom of her bag, before starting her car and driving to CBI office.

On the way back, she thought about Jane. Even though she now had no doubt that she was pregnant, she didn't feel anywhere near ready to tell him about it. She had absolutely no idea how he would take it; whether he would be happy and excited, or if he would want nothing to do with it or her. She was also scared about what sort of effect it would have on him, given his past. He'd never shown any inkling of wanting to date or marry anyone else, it was reasonable to assume that having children came under this as well. Bringing up another child could be so painful and fraught with memories of Charlotte for him, it was perfectly understandable if he simply hadn't wanted to go through that.

Lisbon desperately hoped that that wouldn't be the case though. Not only did she think that having a child could actually be very beneficial in helping Jane confront his demons, she wasn't sure she could do this all by herself. For the first time since her mother's death, Lisbon reflected on how much she actually needed someone to help her. The whole thing was new, unexpected, and quite frankly, petrifying, and she hated the thought of going through the whole thing alone. She would be able to cope even if Jane wanted to be there just as her friend, and not as the child's father. But if he freaked out and ran off? She tried not to even think about that.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi! I keep forgetting to say a huge THANK YOU for all the lovely reviews! I'm so glad people are actually reading this story let alone bothering to review, it really motivates me to update sooner (when I really should be revising…oops…). Please, keep reviewing!**

 **PS I have done some research and discovered that you are allowed one coffee a day during pregnancy…just in case anyone thought I was being accidently inaccurate here**

It was Monday morning, over a week after her first doctor's appointment, and Lisbon had said nothing to Jane. She had tried to a couple of times, but she'd never got beyond 'Jane' before quickly changing the subject to something completely different. It didn't feel right to bring up something like that when they were driving to and from a crime scene, or a mourning relative, or a potential murderer…And the few times where they had been alone in her office (mostly in the evenings), the image of Jane telling her that he wanted nothing to do with it or her had flashed before her eyes, and she'd changed track. She knew that she absolutely had to tell him before her next doctor's appointment (which was in 3 weeks), even if it meant turning up to his apartment the night before, blurting it out and running.

Lisbon sighed and glanced out into the bullpen from her desk. Jane didn't seem to be there, which was strange. Lisbon frowned, craning her neck to see if he was hidden in the corner of the kitchen. Suddenly the man in question stepped around the corner from where the elevator was, a polystyrene cup and a paper bag in his hands. Lisbon quickly turned her eyes back to the stack of papers she was working her way through, hoping that he hadn't noticed her staring at him.

"I bought you coffee and a bearclaw"

Jane had pushed open her office door and stepped in.

"Oh thank you" she smiled widely at him, suddenly feeling ever so slightly tearful at the sweetness of his gesture. _Stupid hormones_.

"It's a Monday morning, I guessed you'd need one" he shrugged.

"I do" she sighed "As much as I like our new Boss; he tends to be a little overzealous when it comes to reports"

"He has however, just updated the rules to allow relationships between colleagues" Jane told her.

"It worked? I guess Cho is all yours now" she joked.

"I've left copies of the updated document on both Rigsby and Grace's desks, in about 1 minute Grace will finish reading hers and smile at Rigsby"

Lisbon followed his gaze into the bullpen, where two members of her team were busy scanning through pages of Bureau Policy. As predicted, Van Pelt's face suddenly lit up with a grin and she stared over at Rigsby, waiting for him to reach the same section. Lisbon felt like she was spying on a private and intimate moment between the two Agents, as they caught each others' eyes and grinned happily. She looked at Jane for a moment, who was watching with a bemused smile.

"Jane" she began slowly, her heart pounding in her chest "I need to tell you something, I-"

She was cut off by her cell phone ringing. With Jane's worried eyes on her, she picked it up and answered the call.

"Lisbon"

"Ok, we'll be right there"

"Yes sir"

"Ok"

She hung up and dropped her phone into her pocket.

"We've got a case" she explained, standing up and stretching slightly.

"Lisbon, that thing you were about to say?"

"It's nothing. I'll tell you another time"

She grabbed her bag and walked out of the office before he could stop her. Now was not the time to be having that conversation, not when there was a corpse waiting for them and a murderer to catch.

The crime scene wasn't far from the CBI office, a small apartment in a pleasant neighbourhood.

"Is this where the victim lives?" Jane asked, frowning.

"If you allowed me to bring you up to date before asking questions, Mr Jane, you'd know that no, this was not his apartment" the local PD officer replied cattily. He'd clearly come across Jane before, and not left with the best attitude towards the consultant.

"As I was about to say" the officer glared at Jane "our victim is Charles McCain, single gunshot to the chest but with signs of a struggle. This apartment belongs to his friend, Victoria, who returned home to find him here"

"What was he doing in her apartment without her?" Lisbon asked, hoping that Jane wouldn't further provoke the officer.

"She'd given him a key"

The officer watched suspiciously as Jane leant over the corpse. He appeared to be about thirty, with thick brown hair and a pleasant face.

"Sad" Jane muttered "he seems like a nice man"

Lisbon didn't bother to ask how he'd managed to come up with that and continued to ask the officer questions, noting down his responses on a small pad.

"Where's the girl who found him?" Jane asked suddenly, interrupting the officer.

"In the kitchen" the officer said, crossing his arms and glaring.

Lisbon narrowed her eyes at Jane, willing him to leave the room. Thankfully, he seemed to have received her telepathic message and disappeared through the door to the left of him. Lisbon finished up talking to the officer, and then followed Jane into the kitchen. He was sitting close to a pretty woman with dark brown hair, who was sniffing as Jane rubbed her arm comfortingly and talking to her in a low voice.

"Hi, I'm Agent Lisbon. Could I ask you a few questions?"

The girl looked up, and Jane let his hand fall away from her arm.

"Yeah, go ahead…sorry, I'm a bit of a mess"

Jane smiled encouragingly and then got up and walked away, letting Lisbon take his seat.

"The officer already has your statement, these are just general questions" she explained "How long had you known the victim?"

"Since I was about 7, he moved in down the street from me"

"And you'd given him a key to your apartment, correct?"

She nodded.

"What was he doing here without you?"

"I'd invited him over for coffee but he must have arrived before I got back from the shop. He often lets himself in…let himself in, if I wasn't there" she sniffed loudly and blinked a few times "sorry, this is just such a shock"

"Don't worry about it" Lisbon smiled warmly at her "was your relationship…romantic in any way?"

"Romantic? God no" the girl looked shocked "he's married, and besides…"

"Why no wedding ring?" Jane interrupted.

"He was so scared of losing it that he rarely wore it out" she couldn't help but smile, clearly in amusement "but he loved Madeleine to pieces, I have no doubt"

"I think that's all for now, we'll be in touch if we need anything else" Lisbon told her, instinctively knowing that this girl had had nothing to do with the murder.

"Do you have any friends that live nearby?" Jane asked her as the two women stood up.

Victoria nodded, blinking to try and hold back a fresh wave of tears.

"Go and stay with one of them, tell them what's happened" he told her gently.

"Ok" she whispered.

Lisbon and Jane left the apartment after making sure that one of the local PD officers would give Victoria a lift to a friend's.

"You ok?" Lisbon asked as she started to drive away "you seem…quiet"

Jane chuckled slightly; the past week or so he had been the concerned friend and she had been the quiet one.

"Yes, I'm just trying to put my finger on what I spotted at the crime scene"

"Oh? What did you spot?"

"I don't quite know, but I'll work it out soon enough"

"Well we're heading over to see the wife now; that might jog something"

"Maybe"

The victim's house was only a short car ride from the crime scene, for which Lisbon was grateful. For the past few days she had started to notice that car journeys were making her increasingly queasy, although thankfully she hadn't actually been sick yet. Even without any sudden runs to the restroom, she was fairly sure that Jane had noticed her pale face and reduced caffeine intake – it was only a mater of time before he put two and two together and worked it out himself. That was assuming that he didn't already know, anyway. She sighed as they pulled up onto the grand driveway. She had to tell him soon, maybe she could catch him after work tonight.

"Mrs McCain?" Lisbon asked as the door swung open, revealing a tall, beautiful woman with long blond hair and red rimmed eyes.

"Madeleine" she sniffed "I assume you're the police?"

"CBI" Lisbon held up her badge for inspection "Agent Lisbon, Patrick Jane"

"Please, come in"

They followed her through to the spacious living room, noting the modern yet tasteful décor of the house.

"Can I get you a drink?" she offered.

"Oh no, I'll go and make some tea" Jane insisted her, already stepping towards the door.

Madeleine looked hopelessly after him, but seemed to accept it and sank into an armchair, whilst Lisbon perched on the edge of a luscious sofa.

"How long had you known Charles?" Lisbon asked her gently. She didn't want to call him 'the victim' to his own wife.

"Nearly ten years now, we met in college but we only got together three years ago"

"And had he been acting differently at all recently?"

"No, he was the same as ever"

Her eyes glistened slightly, but she blinked away the tears before they had a chance to fall.

"I'm sorry, we can come back another time if this is too much" Lisbon said after a moment.

"No…no don't worry, I want to get it done. So you can catch the bastard who did this"

"What about his job?"

"He loved it; he was such a creative person"

"Did he ever have any problems at work? With colleagues…clients…?"

"There was one man he didn't get on with…" Madeleine frowned, trying to remember "Michael something I think, but it was just a work disagreement, nothing personal"

Lisbon noted down the name; she'd get Van Pelt to look into it as soon as they left.

"What about outside of work?"

"No" she said sadly "everyone loved him"

They were interrupted by Jane returning, somehow managing to hold three cups which he placed on the coffee table.

"Did you know that Charles was going to see Victoria this morning?" he asked.

"Yes, he goes over quite often"

"And you never suspected any sort of romantic relationship between her and Charles?" Jane pressed.

They were both surprised when Madeleine laughed in response.

"Victoria? No definitely not"

"Oh" Jane muttered in realisation "Victoria's a lesbian, that's it"

"Yes, she had quite a bit of trouble coming out to her family. Charles helped her with that"

They were interrupted by a wail from somewhere in the house. Lisbon jumped slightly, her hand automatically going to the gun at her waist.

"Sorry" Madeleine muttered, standing up and heading towards the door "I'll just go and get him"

She returned a few moments later, carrying a baby. He was babbling happily to her, and Lisbon felt her heart warm as she watched the baby giggle and grab at his mothers hair with tiny hands. Jane's eyes lit up at the sight of the child, and Lisbon couldn't help but notice the smile that crept onto his face.

"May I?" he asked, holding his arms out slightly.

"Sure"

Madeleine passed him carefully to Jane, who turned him round to sit on his lap.

"Hello little one, you're very cheery aren't you?"

He bounced him up and down a few times, and the child giggled infectiously.

"Do you think that this could be at all related to Victoria?" Lisbon asked, keen to get back to the questions and to distract herself from the sight of Jane away chatting to the baby.

"I don't think so" Madeleine frowned in thought again "nothing that comes to mind"

"What's he called?" Jane interrupted.

"William" she smiled lovingly at the happy child on Jane's lap.

"He's lovely"

"Thanks" she smiled gratefully at him, and then looked down at the floor "I just keep thinking about how he's going to grow up without a father, how he'll never even…even remember his face"

She broke off in tears, and the smile disappeared from Jane's face. Lisbon sat frozen; she knew she should do something to comfort her, but saying 'it'll be ok' seemed so pointless when they both knew it wouldn't be. Thankfully Jane sprung into action.

"Here, take him" he muttered to Lisbon, depositing the child on her lap and stepping across the room to sit beside the crying woman and tell her to breathe.

Lisbon meanwhile, was wondering if he would be better off over here comforting her. Since she had felt William's warm weight on her lap, she had been able to do nothing but stare at him in shock. The child on her lap didn't seem to notice her distress, and reached up to grab a handful of the hair that hung down over her shoulders. Lisbon's expression turned to surprise, and she barely noticed the pain of him tugging a clump of hair.

"Mama!" he shouted excitedly, pulling forcefully on her hair.

"No, I'm not your mama" she corrected him softly, finally coming to her senses and untangling his hand from her hair.

Upon relinquishing the hair, he grabbed hold of her thumb instead. The feeling of his tiny fingers squeezing her thumb was too much for her, and Lisbon felt her eyes welling up. She blinked a few times and tugged her hand out of his grasp, putting her hands under his arms to move him into a more secure position. It wasn't that she had never held a baby before (she'd held her brothers when they were young, and her niece Annie, even Rigsby's son Ben) but it was wholly different experience now that she knew that she was expecting one. When he shuffled closer and let his head rest against her chest, she actually let out a small 'oh' of surprise and looked over at Jane and Madeleine in panic, who to her relief had noticed nothing.

Jane had managed to calm her down now and she had stopped crying, yet he was continuing to talk in a low, gentle voice. Lisbon recognised it as the voice he used to hypnotise people, but she was fairly sure that that wasn't what he was doing right now. He looked up for a moment and grinned as he caught her eye. Lisbon smiled back, and then he stood up.

"I think we'll be going now"

"Yes, we'll be in touch if we need anything else" Lisbon added.

"Oh ok, thank you" she shot Jane a watery smile.

Lisbon managed to stand up whilst still holding William. She felt slightly bereft when she felt his gentle weight lifted from her waist, as his mother took him back into her arms. The child babbled at bit at the familiar touch of his mother, who blinked back a few tears as she held him close to her and kissed his head.

"Be good" Jane told him with a cheeky grin.

Lisbon turned and left the room before either of them could see that her eyes were slightly glistening again at the sight.

Jane let out a deep breath as they walked together towards the car.

"Poor woman, she's devastated"

"Unlike you not to immediately accuse her of the murder" Lisbon joked.

"There's no way she did it, I would have noticed. Plus she wouldn't risk anything that could cause her to be separated from her child"

Lisbon didn't say anything in response as they climbed into the car. She _had_ to tell him. Today.

They passed the journey back to the office in silence, with Lisbon trying to ignore the nausea pooling in her stomach.

" _Jane, I need to tell you something. I'm pregnant"_

" _Congratulations, we're having a baby!"_

" _Hey, do you remember that time we slept together? Well guess what"_

Lisbon groaned internally. None of the ways of telling him which she had come up with seemed at all appealing. She guessed she could always write it on a scrap of paper and slip it into his pocket; he would appreciate the novelty of that at least, but it wasn't right. She needed to sit him down and tell him straight out, and then let him decide what he wanted to do about it. Had it been with anyone else, she would have demanded that they were involved to a degree – it simply wasn't fair to completely abandon your own child – but this was Jane, and this was different. She had to understand that maybe he wouldn't be able to cope with it, and she would have to explain the whole sorry story to her child one day. But what she desperately hoped was that he saw this as what it could be: a new chance at happiness.

It had reached early evening, and having spent all day checking out leads without success, Lisbon's team had started to trickle home. She noted with slight amusement that Rigsby and Van Pelt continued to keep their relationship a secret, despite it being perfectly in fitting with Bureau Policy now. They still left the office at different times, and arrived separately every morning (although it was clear to all that they were more or less living together).

Lisbon wasn't sure whether to be relieved or horrified that Jane was still sitting on his couch and sipping tea as Cho packed up his things and said goodbye. She had half been hoping that he would leave early, so that she'd have no excuse but to put it off for another day. When he got up to wash up his cup in the kitchen, Lisbon knew that it was her chance. She took a deep breath and counted down from ten, before stepping out of her office and walking into the kitchen. Jane had his back to her when she entered, but she was fairly sure he had heard her come in anyway.

"Jane" she began "I…I need to tell you something"

"Oh?"

He placed his cup on the drying rack and turned to face her. She tried not to be distracted by how weirdly attractive he looked when he wasn't wearing his jacket and had his sleeves rolled up.

"I'm pregnant" she blurted out.

Jane said nothing for a long time, and Lisbon started to wonder if she'd actually said it out loud or not. She was on the brink of repeating herself, when he finally spoke.

"Is it-"

"Yours? God Jane, is that really what you think of me?"

"I didn't mean…I was just…I'm just checking"

Had Lisbon not been in a state of immense stress in that moment, she would have quite enjoyed seeing Patrick Jane looking _flustered_ for what was probably the first time in his life.

"Yes, of course it's yours"

"Oh…ok" he nodded slowly, clearly too shocked to be able to formulate any complex words or sentences.

"I just want you to know that…that I understand if you don't think you can be involved. I know that you never meant for this to happen, and given what happened…before…I won't hate you if you just want to-"

"You think I don't want to be involved in this?"

He had suddenly become aware of what she was saying, and that shocked him almost as much as the news he had just been given.

"Well I thought that maybe-"

"You thought that because of what happened to Charlotte I might find having another child too painful?"

He felt the usual sting at the mention of her name, but ignored it. Lisbon simply nodded, her eyes focussed on the floor.

"Oh Lisbon" he said softly, stepping forward to hug her.

Lisbon had to fight back the tears that had suddenly formed in her eyes. She wasn't sure if it was utter relief or just her messed up hormones, but she wasn't going to let whatever it was get the better of her. Instead, she let Jane wrap his arms around and her and hold her so tightly to him she was a little worried that he might never let go. She breathed in his familiar scent and let herself relax into his embrace. They remained like that for a few moments, until a noise from outside the kitchen caused them to break apart and peer out. It turned out only to be the cleaner who was wheeling along her trolley, completely unaware of what was going on in the kitchen.

"How long have you known?" he asked her, still standing only inches away from her.

"Two weeks" she said quietly "You seem genuinely surprised, did you really not know?"

"I actually thought one of your brothers had been arrested and asked you to help him out" he admitted, chuckling slightly.

"Wow, the one time I actually manage to lie to Patrick Jane…"

"I knew something big was going on, I just slightly miscalculated what it was" he pointed out.

"Slightly" she smiled shyly at him.

"Lisbon?"

Gable, her boss, had just put his head around the door.

"Sir?"

"I've just left some papers on your desk, I need you to look over them and get them back to me by Wednesday"

"Ok, no problem"

"Night Lisbon, Jane"

He walked away, leaving them alone again.

"Why don't you go home? I'll get some food and come over and we can talk" Jane asked tentatively, as soon as Gable was out of earshot.

Lisbon nodded. That seemed much better than staying at the office, where there was always the chance of some Agent pulling an all-nighter wandering through.

Lisbon drove home in fairly high spirits. For the first time since finding out she was pregnant, she was starting to think that maybe, just _maybe_ , everything would be ok. Jane's reaction was nothing like that which she'd dreaded. She'd had visions of him being upset, furious, talking of never seeing her again…and instead he had been shocked that she'd thought that he would leave her alone in this.

Once home, Lisbon estimated that she had about half an hour until Jane arrived; plenty of time for the shower she'd been craving all afternoon. She dressed herself in sweatpants and a t-shirt, and brushed her hair but couldn't be bothered to dry it. Normally she would never have dreamed of having a guest over whilst dressed in what were essentially pyjamas, but this was Jane and after all of the emotional discomfort she had felt recently she decided that she deserved it. Jane did look a little surprised when Lisbon answered the door with her hair still wet from the shower and her t-shirt slipping off her shoulder ever so slightly, but said nothing. Secretly there was something he found incredibly attractive about this version of Lisbon; it was a stark contrast to the 'boss mode' he was used to, and it made him feel happy that she was comfortable with him seeing her like this. Jane busied himself plating up the Chinese takeaway he had brought, making sure to put a generous portion on Lisbon's plate (he knew how she often forgot to eat when stressed).

"So" he began, as they tucked into their food at the kitchen table "where do we start with this?"

"I have no idea" she admitted "I still don't quite believe it"

"Well I was thinking that it would make more sense if we lived together, it's probably easier to live at mine because I have 3 bedrooms but if you really want to stay here then I'm sure we-"

"Jane!"

"What?"

"Slow down! I thought we were going to talk about doctors' appointments and stuff, and why do we have to live together all of a sudden? It's not like we're a couple"

' _We could be if you wanted to'_ he nearly replied, but held himself back. Now was definitely not the time to tell Lisbon that he was in love with her.

"Because it'll be much easier when the baby comes" he explained.

"But that's not for ages! We don't need to think about that yet!"

"Time flies Lisbon, and we'd have to sort it out in 5 months or so just in case the baby was premature"

"Jane, just stop planning everything for a moment. This is already scary enough without you making me stress about things happening in 5 months time"

"Why don't you tell me what we need to discuss then?"

"I…I don't know" she said.

"Lisbon"

Jane reached across the table and took her hand in both of his.

"This is all going to be fine, trust me"

Lisbon's gaze remained focussed on the plate of food in front of her.

"Teresa" he said more softly, causing her to look up "please"

"I know" she responded.

"Good. Then how about we finish eating and talk about something completely unrelated for the rest of the evening? You're right; we don't need to sort everything out right now"

Lisbon nodded at him, and let him begin coming up with suggestions for solving their current case. When he left an hour and a half later he surprised her by giving her a big hug goodbye and kissing her on the top of her head. Lisbon remained frozen for a few minutes after he had left, her fingers absentmindedly touching the spot his lips had just touched. And then she tidied up the kitchen and went straight to bed, trying not to think about how intimate a gesture it had been.

 **PPS**

 **Did anyone see the photo of Robin Tunney and Oscar in Italy on her instagram? It's the sweetest thing!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Being ill for a few days and being stuck sitting around in my house has some positives…lots of time to re-watch episodes and write!**

Lisbon was not surprised in the slightest when she arrived at work the next morning and found a fresh coffee and blueberry muffin sitting on her desk. She also had no doubts that the coffee was decaf, but she picked it up regardless and took a long sip before heading into the bullpen to see if there had been any updates on the case.

"Boss?" Van Pelt called her over "I've been looking through the victim's phone records. There were several calls from the same number the night before his death, which is registered to someone called Alan Foster. When I looked into him, it turns out that he actually used to live on the same street as the victim"

"Interesting" Jane muttered from beside Lisbon. She hadn't even noticed him coming over to listen.

"Good work Van Pelt"

"That's not all. On a hunch I pulled up Victoria's phone records – it said in your notes that she grew up on the same street - and found that she too had received several calls from Foster that night"

"Aha" Jane said suddenly.

"What?"

"Well I would be willing to put money on the fact that all of this stems from that street they all lived on. Something happened, and for some reason it's caused Foster to get in contact with them and most likely murder poor Charles McCain"

"Or he could be a family friend getting in touch with old neighbours" Lisbon pointed out "but I can't deny that the timing is very suspicious"

"Grace, did the victim make any outgoing calls the night before he was killed?" Jane asked, and Van Pelt turned back to her computer to scroll through the page again.

"Only one, to Victoria"

"How long was it?"

"Just over three minutes"

"Brilliant"

"Why's that brilliant?" Lisbon cut in.

"Because he was ringing to tell her that Foster was trying to contact him and to arrange to meet up and talk about it"

"Right, but why three minutes?"

"It must be something that they couldn't talk about over the phone, meaning that his wife couldn't have known about it"

"Van Pelt, take Jane and go and talk to Victoria. If he's right about this then she could be in danger"

"Don't you want to come, Lisbon? You might miss out on all of the fun" Jane asked, grinning at her.

"I'll survive" she told him, trying not to roll her eyes "I'll ring local PD and get the address they dropped her off at yesterday; I assume she's still there"

Lisbon left Van Pelt's desk to go back to her office and get her phone from her bag. Jane followed her, shutting the office door behind him.

"Are you ok?" he asked her, searching her face for any signs that she was feeling particularly stressed.

"Yes, I'm fine"

"Really?"

"Really" she shot him a small smile "You're right, this will all be ok"

"Yes, it will" he smiled warmly at her.

Her smile still in place, she picked up her phone and dialled local PD.

Jane's smile quickly turned to a concerned frown as he listened to Lisbon's half of the conversation.

"Hi, this is Agent Lisbon. We met at a crime scene yesterday; I just wanted to ask for an address where you dropped a woman off yesterday"

"What? What happened?"

"Is she ok?"

"Ok, we'll be there right away"

She hung up and dropped her phone in her jacket pocket.

"Apparently someone broke into the place Victoria was staying and tried to kill her early this morning. We need to get to the hospital"

"Did they catch them?"

"No" Lisbon sighed "the friend heard the struggle and managed to call Local PD before distracting him, but he got away. He shot Victoria in the shoulder as well"

An hour later Jane and Lisbon were sitting at a table in the hospital canteen, sipping their polystyrene cups of tea.

"What do we do now?" Lisbon asked "she won't be awake for another hour, but I want to talk to her as soon as we can"

"We need to work out exactly why he was going after them. I asked Grace to look into any kidnappings or murders that took place near where they grew up. I think that Foster was involved with something and they saw, although why he waited until now to do something about it I don't know"

"I've put a BOLO out on him as well; Rigsby and Cho checked his house already. Why a kidnapping or murder?"

"Victoria is scared; I assumed it was just shock yesterday. Plus it's something big enough that he has to kill them to cover it up"

Lisbon took a gulp of tea and then sighed.

"What?" Jane narrowed his eyes slightly in concern.

"Nothing, just tired" she said, yawning slightly "I miss caffeine"

Jane couldn't help but chuckle at that, which made Lisbon smile slightly as she yawned again.

"You never got round to telling me when the next doctor's appointment was" he told her, suddenly remembering.

"Oh, I think it's the 10th"

"Of?" he prompted.

"March, but you don't have to come"

"Lisbon, I'll be there" he insisted gently.

Thankfully Lisbon's phone rang before they could dwell anymore on that particular topic of conversation.

"Lisbon"

"Ok, thanks"

"That was Van Pelt" she told Jane after hanging up "she didn't find anything about a murder or a kidnapping, although there was a girl who disappeared 20 years ago from the area. The victim would have been 10 at the time"

"We'll ask Victoria about it when she wakes up then, but I think I know how to catch our killer"

"You do?"

"Yup, I'll tell you once we've spoken to her"

"Could you not, I don't know, tell me now?" Lisbon suggested, sounding a little more catty than intended.

"I could but I'd much prefer it if you kept guessing" he winked at her "and that chocolate cake looks good, do you want a slice?"

"I'm alright thanks"

The idea of eating any sort of cake actually made her want to throw up currently, but she decided not to tell Jane that. Apparently he guessed it anyway from the way she scrunched her nose up, from the sympathetic smile he shot her.

"Another tea?"

"A coffee would be nice, at least I can kid myself that it's caffeinated" she joked.

"Your wish is my command"

He waved his hands in the air like a magician as he stood up, grinning over his shoulder at her as he walked away.

"Lisbon" Jane whispered "wake up"

"Huh?"

Lisbon felt him shaking her gently and forced her eyes open. She didn't even remember dropping off. _Stupid lack of caffeine._

"Did something happen?" she asked, sitting up and realising that she had actually been fast asleep against Jane's shoulder.

"Not yet"

"Then why wake me?"

"I was bored; I wanted someone to talk to. Plus you probably shouldn't be asleep in the middle of a stakeout"

"Yeah, I guess not" she yawned "do you have the bag? I'm hungry"

Jane reached around on the floor beside him, and she soon heard a rustling noise as his hand came into contact with the plastic bag.

"What flavour do you want?"

"Cheese and pickle"

"I think that's this one"

Jane held out the sandwich box in her direction and Lisbon reached out to take it from him.

"Ouch!"

Lisbon's hand recoiled.

"That was my eye" he explained " _This_ is your sandwich. Your night vision really sucks"

"Well sorry, I'm used to being asleep at 3am" she grumbled, ripping into her sandwich "This isn't cheese and pickle"

She shoved the packet back in his direction and covered her mouth and nose with her hand.

"This baby does not like tuna" she commented as he nudged her arm with the other sandwich box "thanks"

"Sorry, I'll put that one away"

"No, you eat it. I'll manage" she sighed, opening the second packet and sniffing cautiously to see if it was the correct flavour.

"I'm not hungry. And a tired and nauseous Lisbon is a little too much to handle" he joked. He didn't see the glare she shot him in the darkness.

"I don't think he's coming" she said after a few minutes, having devoured her sandwich "pass me a water"

"He will, have some faith" Jane insisted, before speaking into the radio "Hey Rigsby, have you or Grace seen anything yet?"

"Um no, nothing yet" came the crackled reply.

"Wait why is Van Pelt with Rigsby? I thought I told Cho to go?" Lisbon asked.

"I told them to switch"

"Jane! Even though it's no longer against the rules, their working together can still cause problems"

"It doesn't cause us problems" he replied quietly.

"And we're not a couple" she pointed out.

"We are having a baby together" he reminded her "it looks a little hypocritical for you to split them up whilst still working with me all the time"

"That's completely different. Besides, they won't know you're the father"

"Hold on a minute, you weren't planning on telling anyone that I'm the father?"

"Well I thought-"

She broke off, hearing a noise in the next room. Both of them jumped to their feet and Lisbon pulled her gun out of its holster, pointing it towards the door. Behind her, Jane found the light switch and rested his hand over it. The door swung open slowly, and Jane hit the light switch as Lisbon shouted 'CBI, don't move'. Foster froze like a rabbit in headlights, and then his eyes raked over the empty bed beside him and the gun pointed at him and his body relaxed slightly in defeat. He slowly lowered his gun to the ground and dropped it, then placed his hands above his head.

"Alan Foster, I'm arresting you for the murder of Charles McCain and the attempted murder of Victoria Wheeler. Anything you say can and will be used against you in court. You…"

"I told you he'd come" Jane reminded her as she carted a handcuffed Foster out of the apartment.

Lisbon secured him in the back of her SUV and then pulled out her phone to alert Cho that Victoria was safe to return to her apartment. Then she rang Rigsby to explain that they'd caught him, and ask how he managed to get into the building without them seeing. Rigsby's flustered explanation was less than convincing, and as soon as she put the phone down she turned to Jane.

"Do you see what you've done? You could have gotten one of us killed"

"Relax Lisbon. We're both fine and the plan worked didn't it? Even if Grace and Rigsby were too busy making out to spot the killer coming in…"

"That's beside the point! Don't mess around with my team organisation! And I'll be talking to them both tomorrow"

"I'm sorry. I wasn't expecting that to happen, I just thought they might appreciate the time together" he told her, looking apologetic.

She narrowed her eyes at him for a few moments, trying to determine if the apologetic expression was genuine or not.

"Fine. Don't do it again"

She stomped away from him and into the driver's seat of her car, slamming the door behind her. Jane let her walk away, and then realised that she would simply drive off without him if he didn't get into the car. She did wait until he climbed into the car but pulled away quickly before he had a chance to do up his seatbelt, causing him to fly into the window.

"Calm down woman" he muttered, earning himself a glare which somehow managed to channel her intense irritation towards him.

"If you maim me with your angry driving I can just tell everyone else what you were saying in your sleep earlier" he threatened, grinning at her as he managed to do up his seatbelt.

"What? What was I saying?" The hint of fear in her voice was evident. She vaguely remembered Jane appearing in her dream earlier, if she'd said something out loud…

"Oh wouldn't you like to know" he winked at her "maybe when you're being nice to me"

Lisbon muttered something under her breath that sounded suspiciously like 'arsehole' and Jane decided that it was safer not to antagonise her further. He knew she was feeling tired and stressed, and as much as he enjoyed teasing her he didn't want to push it. Besides what she _had_ said in her sleep had made him very happy, but it would embarrass Lisbon. In fact, she would be mortified to know that she had fallen asleep on his shoulder and murmured his name in a way that sounding a little more than platonic. He had woken her up shortly after that, feeling too much like he was intruding by listening to her unconscious words; although he had no doubt that that particular memory would remain engrained in his mind palace for a long time.

"You didn't say anything, don't worry" he reassured her. She'd probably be grateful he'd lied to protect her pride if he ever did tell her.

The drive back to the CBI office was very quiet after that. They left Foster in a cell and went to their respective apartments for a few hours of sleep before the following work day.

The following morning passed slowly, with interviewing Foster and filling in all sorts of paperwork to close the case. Lisbon also had the slightly unpleasant job of pulling Van Pelt and Rigsby into her office and asking exactly why they didn't warn her that their suspect had walked right past their car yesterday, and then reprimanding them about it. She felt bad for getting so angry at people she considered her friends, but at the same time kissing whilst they should have been alert was completely inappropriate, and had the suspect apprehended them her or Jane could have been injured or even killed. It was her job to be angry when they got out of line she reminded herself, but she still felt bad about having made them look so guilty and even slightly scared. After the long morning she had had, she was almost relieved when Jane dragged her out of her office and across the street to the little café, demanding that she had lunch with him. She had an inkling that he wanted to continue the conversation that they had been having the previous night (or early that morning), but she was hungry and needed a break from the office. Plus, it was inevitably going to come up at some point; she might as well get it over with sooner rather than later.

"What do you want?" he asked, looking over the top of his menu at her.

"I don't know, I'm sort of craving ice cream right now" she admitted.

"Then we'll go and get ice cream after, but you need some proper food first"

"I think I'll have a toasted sandwich. Cheese and tomato"

Jane left the table to order and Lisbon sat alone for a few minutes, contemplating exactly what she was going to say to him.

"So" Jane began, sitting down at the table again and placing a cup of tea in front of her "are you that ashamed of having slept with me that you're going to lie to your closest friends about your child's father?"

Lisbon very nearly spat the large sip of tea she had taken in his face, and she felt herself blushing furiously at the bluntness of his words.

"That's not what I meant at all!"

"What did you mean then?"

"I just meant that…well that…"

She paused for a moment to gather her thoughts and Jane let her, watching expectantly.

"People at work – Gable, the new DA – are going to look down on me if they know that we slept together. They won't know that it was just a stupid drunken mistake; they'll think we're together and that makes the way I let you get away with stuff at work look really unprofessional"

 _Stupid drunken mistake._ Jane felt as if she had had just pinched part of his heart and he froze for a few seconds.

"So what? I plan to be very much a part of our child's life; I can't do that if you're not even willing to admit the truth. It's not like everyone else in the CBI won't assume I am anyway" he replied finally.

"Why would they assume that?"

"Lisbon, do you have any idea about the levels of speculation over our relationship?"

"What speculation?" she frowned at him "I know people know we're close, but it's clearly platonic"

 _Or it was anyway,_ she added mentally.

"You need to spend more time listening into the conversations around the water cooler" he told her, trying not to smile at how naïve she could sometimes be "half the office think we've been sleeping together for ages, and the other half are convinced that we'll get married within the year"

"Oh" she looked down at her tea "I didn't know that, I guess I'd heard stuff but I thought they were joking"

"What I'm saying, is that whether or not you tell them the truth they'll still suspect. Gable has probably been assuming that that's the reason you're more lenient with me ever since he started" Jane explained.

"But that's not the case at all!" she protested "I'm lenient because you put the bad guys away and that's the most important thing. Does he really think that?"

"I know that's not the case" although goodness knows how much he wished it was "but everyone else thinks it is. You might as well just make my life a lot easier by being honest"

"I guess" she muttered "I didn't mean it to sound like I was ashamed; I just hadn't really thought everything through. Nor did I realise that our friendship was of such interest to everyone else"

"So you're not going to go around telling everyone that Walter Mashburn is the father?"

Lisbon blushed and Jane grinned at her. To her great relief, she was saved the embarrassment of having to answer by the arrival of their lunch. She snatched up her sandwich and started eating it so she would have an excuse not to respond to the latest question. They ate in silence, Jane's face still filled with a satisfied smile. After they left the café Lisbon automatically turned to cross over back to the CBI, but Jane caught hold of her arm and pulled her away in the opposite direction.

"Jane" she protested, tugging her arm back "I have to get back to work, where are you taking me?"

"Ice cream" he said simply.

Lisbon rolled her eyes but stopped resisting and followed him anyway. She did really want an ice cream. They walked for 5 minutes, and Lisbon was on the cusp of asking if he had any idea of where they were going when Jane stopped suddenly in front a run down ice cream and hot chocolate van.

"Um Jane, we've passed like 4 places on the way" she pointed out, eying the rusty wheels and tired sign warily.

"Trust me Lisbon; this ice cream is the best in Sacramento"

"I'll have a mint choc chip" Jane paused and studied Lisbon's face "and she'll have a pistachio"

"Do I not get to choose which flavour I want?" she demanded as he handed over a few notes.

"Do you want to change your flavour?" he shot back.

Lisbon said nothing and avoided his eyes, trying very hard to look annoyed at him and failing miserably.

"Exactly" he grinned at her, and then passed over her ice cream.

They wandered back to the office slowly, getting a few weird looks for eating something so cold when it was barely Spring in Sacramento.

"Ok you win, that was some good ice cream" Lisbon admitted as she finished munching on the cone.

"I told you, when have I ever been wrong?"

She decided not to answer that.

"Anyway thanks for lunch Jane, it was nice" she told him "and now I have to go back into the office knowing that everyone there thinks we've actually been making out like teenagers for the past half hour" she added with a sigh.

"I still can't believe you didn't know about that, you're meant to be a detective"

"Well, some people bet on crazy things" she pointed out "and I'm not exactly one to listen to office gossip"

"So you didn't even know about the bet?"

"They've got a bet going?" her eyes widened "between who?"

"Rigsby, Van Pelt, a couple of guys from missing persons…" Jane listed "oh Cho is in but he says nothing will ever happen"

"At least someone is on the right track"

Jane shot her a look.

"Well…mostly the right track" she amended.

They fell silent again as they stepped into the elevator. Lisbon's phone rang just before they reached the bullpen, with Gable telling her that they'd been assigned another case. Lisbon sighed as she listened to the few details – it sounded like a gory one – and then filled her team in before heading back out of the building to the crime scene.

It was late when Lisbon finally got home that night. The crime scene had been over an hour away, and they'd spent a while searching surrounding area for the other pieces of body that had been scattered about. The combination of the car-induced nausea and an afternoon of staring at a brutally chopped up body had left her feeling less than hungry, but she made herself eat some leftover pasta and a bowl of fruit. Looking after herself seemed much more important now it wasn't just her wellbeing to worry about.

She was amazed at how easily she and Jane had settled into the thought that they were having a baby together. It wasn't awkward and embarrassing like the weeks that had followed their sleeping together. Instead, it felt almost _normal_. She admitted to herself that the idea that she could somehow hide the child's paternity from those around her was absurd in reality. There was no way she could explain why Jane was coming with her to doctor's appointments with her, nor why he would be looking after her baby half of the time once it was born. Besides, it seemed inevitable that it would have enough of his features for it to be clear to all who's child it was. And it wasn't like she was completely humiliated to have slept with him; the vast majority of single women in the Bureau would have loved an opportunity to get Patrick Jane into their beds. No, it was the admission that she had completely transcended the barriers between personal and professional that had scared her about everyone knowing. Her need to be seen as the 'cool, hard boss' completely went against what she had done. But then again, she had done that by overlooking rules throughout his hunt for Red John. The young, hardworking Lisbon would be mortified to think that her future self would go against a direct order from her boss (breaking multiple laws at the same time), let alone become pregnant with her consultant's child, but she had done exactly that. She had no idea why she clung onto the belief that she was still that same girl. That girl was gone the moment that Patrick Jane had stepped into her life, and honestly it was probably for the better. Obviously she would have preferred _not_ to have had to break laws to get to Red John, but ultimately the world was a safer place and Jane seemed finally at peace. Similarly, she would never have chosen _this_ way to become pregnant, but she didn't regret the life growing inside her in any way. In fact, the fear which she had initially felt had started turning to excitement, especially now she had told Jane and his reaction had been so heart-warming. Everything would be ok, even admitting to her colleagues that she and Jane had slept together. Everything.


	8. Chapter 8

"Do you have any questions before we begin?"

Jane and Lisbon were seated in the dimly lit sonogram room, being addressed by a young man with thick brown hair and glasses.

"No" Lisbon answered quickly "I mean I don't, do you?" she added, turning to look at Jane.

"I don't"

He shot her a reassuring smile, which she returned.

"Well then, Miss Lisbon, if you could just lie down over here"

Lisbon followed him to the examination table and lay down on it, feeling very vulnerable with both the sonogram technician and Jane towering over her.

"If I could just move your top up a bit…"

The technician reached over and pushed her blouse up to her ribs, and Lisbon tried to ignore the way that Jane's eyes roamed over her still flat stomach. She was feeling particularly uncomfortable. She didn't like being such a vulnerable position, both lying down and with her stomach on display, and she was worrying about what was going through Jane's mind. He'd said close to nothing to her all morning, and now he was standing beside her looking more like he was waiting in line at a coffee shop than about to see the first image of his child.

"This might be a bit cold" the technician warned, squeezing some clear gel out of a large tube onto her stomach and spreading it out. He seemed completely oblivious of the discomfort and tension around him.

Lisbon lay nervously on the table as the technician fiddled about with the sonogram device for a few minutes. Jane seemed to have noticed her uneasiness, and shuffled slightly close to her so he was standing right next to her head. She glanced at his face hoping to find some sort of sign as to what he was feeling, but there was nothing. He caught her looking and smiled at her again, but it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"Ok, I think we're ready to go now" the technician muttered, coming back to the table.

He pressed some buttons on the screen in front of him, and then picked up the short plastic rod and placed it on her stomach. Lisbon jumped slightly at the sudden contact, but soon forgot about it as soon as the image appeared on the screen. It was grainy and she had to squint slightly to see it, but there was a very clear embryo shape in the gray waves on the screen. She stared in wonder at it, her hand coming up to rest on her chest. Jane shuffled beside her and she realised that she had forgotten he was there. He was smiling slightly at the image on the screen, which was now shifting around as the technician moved the rod around a bit. He turned to look at her, and she noted that the smile was reaching his eyes. He picked up the hand resting on her chest and squeezed it. They grinned at each other for a few moments as all of Lisbon's worries dissolved. The technician started talking to them about embryo development and due dates but neither of them even noticed. They were too busy watching the grey wibbly lines that constituted their child.

Jane kept hold of Lisbon's hand until she was forced to tug it back and readjust her blouse, 10 minutes later, but he took it again and squeezed it as soon as they left the office, not letting go as they walked down the hall and out of the building. She felt a slight sense of longing as they waked out of the automatic doors hand in hand, with an image of their child tucked into her bag. Suddenly she desperately wanted to be part of a happy couple preparing for their child together, looking at cots and babygrows together and arguing over name choices, but as she snuck a glance at the man beside her she knew it couldn't happen. He didn't feel that way about her, and nor did she about him. A small voice inside her reminded her that that wasn't entirely true, but she pushed it away. Sure, she reminisced about their night together from time to time, and maybe she daydreamed about when their baby was born and they were bringing him or her up together, but that didn't mean she was in love with him or anything like that. She loved him as a friend, and she couldn't deny that he was a very attractive man, but that was all there was to it. And even if her feelings were a little more than platonic at points, there was nothing she could or ever would do about it. Jane was, and always would be, in love with his wife. Just because he'd messed up one night wouldn't change that, and their discussion afterwards had thrown out any doubts that it was anything more than a drunken mistake to him. She was just thankful that he was still here with her, when he could very easily have freaked out and found himself lounging about on a tropical island instead.

She suddenly became aware that they'd come to a halt and he'd let go of her hand. They were in the parking lot, standing next to her car.

"Are you ok Lisbon? You're being very quiet"

"I'm just shocked I guess" she admitted "I forget it's real sometimes"

"Same here" he admitted "but I'm glad it is"

"Really?" she hadn't expected that.

"Very rarely do people get a second chance" he explained, smiling sadly at her "now you'd better get back to work, I'll see you later"

"Aren't you coming back now?" Lisbon asked. Her doctor's office was only 5 minutes from the CBI office; 'later' sounded like more than 5 minutes.

"I though you wouldn't us to arrive back together?" He didn't need to elaborate.

"I guess" she shrugged.

"I have an errand to run anyway"

Lisbon decided that she was much better off not knowing what his 'errand' was.

"Bye Lisbon"

"Bye Jane" she called after him as he set off across the parking lot to his own car.

She contemplated what he had meant by 'a second chance' on the way back. It was fairly obvious that it was a reference to what had happened to Charlotte, but she couldn't help but think that there was a deeper meaning from the way he had looked at her as he said it. She was being silly, she knew, and it was probably just a hormonal thing, but she couldn't help that hope that his 'second chance' referred to more than just having another child.

 _Don't be so stupid Teresa_ she told herself, realising what she had just been thinking. She wasn't entirely sure where it had come from, but she hoped that it went away soon. She wasn't in love with Patrick Jane; it was just a natural reaction to being pregnant; wanting to build a safe and secure environment for her child. She also reminded herself that he would never be in love with her so there was no point getting stressed over a hormone induced response, which would more than likely go away in a couple of weeks. Satisfied that she was still sane, she headed back into the office, almost hoping that they had caught a case to take her mind off things.

Jane didn't return to the office until lunchtime, a whole hour after Lisbon had left him at the doctor's. She made a show of pretending to be annoyed at him for having disappeared all morning in front of the team, but when she marched back to her office he followed her in.

"I brought you lunch" he told her, indicating the plastic bag in his hand "do you prefer steak or vegetable pie?"

"I'll have the vegetable" she told him, flopping down into her desk chair. Although her morning sickness seemed to be going, there were some things that made her nauseous from just thinking about.

Jane dug a cardboard box with 'veg' written on it out of the bag, and passed it to her along with a wooden knife and fork.

"Thanks" she muttered "how did you know that I didn't bring my own lunch?"

"You know I never tell, Lisbon"

He actually had had no idea whether or not she had brought lunch, but knew that she needed to be eating something more substantial than her typical salad or sandwich.

"This looks good, I'm starving" Lisbon commented, opening the lid of the box and breathing in the warm aroma "are you not going to eat yours?"

Jane was staring absentmindedly into the distance, having forgotten about his lunch. At Lisbon's comment he shook his head a little and picked up his own box and wooden cutlery.

"When are you going to tell the team?" he asked her nonchalantly.

"Tell them what?" she replied between mouthfuls, frowning slightly at him.

"Next week makes it 12 weeks, that's normally when you start telling people isn't it?"

"Oh" she suddenly caught onto what he was asking "in a week or two then I guess"

Her initial enjoyment of the pie was slowly fading; talking about her pregnancy with Jane made her nervous for a number of reasons. Thankfully he didn't seem to have any more questions and they fell into a comfortable silence.

"How have I never tried these before?" Lisbon asked a few minutes later, having polished off her food "that was delicious"

Jane simply smiled at her again and she furrowed her brow. Something was definitely off with Jane, he normally he had an answer for everything.

"I've been thinking" he began, and Lisbon felt her heart drop in anticipation "If you don't want to tell the team that it's mine to begin with then I'm ok with that. Take as long as you need, I'll wait until you're ready"

She hadn't expected that, and it took her a few minutes to comprehend what he was saying.

"Thank you" she managed finally "I…I will tell them eventually, it's just a massive thing to start with, I don't want to add to it with…" she tailed off.

"It's fine Lisbon. The when is completely up to you"

Lisbon blinked a few times. She couldn't believe that her hormones were actually trying to make her cry at the sweetness of his gesture.

Her phone rang suddenly and she jumped a little.

"Lisbon" she answered.

"Brilliant. I mean obviously a homicide isn't brilliant, I just…"

"Of course, we'll go right away"

"Ok, thanks boss"

"We have a case?" Jane asked as she put the phone down, sighing at her faux pas of describing a murder as 'brilliant'.

"Yup. All the way out in Santa Cruz" she groaned slightly, clearly not looking forward to the two and a half hour drive.

"Ah but the beach Lisbon" Jane pointed out, suddenly looking much happier.

"We're looking into a murder Jane, it's not a vacation" she reminded him "some kids found a body in a cave"

"You've got to look for the silver lining" he shot back.

"There is very rarely a silver lining when we get a case on a Friday afternoon"

The drive out to the crime scene was surprisingly pleasant, despite the traffic adding an hour to their journey time. They took two cars: Jane and Lisbon in one, and Rigsby, Van Pelt and Cho in the second. Jane and Lisbon arrived first, and met with the local PD officers at the scene who talked them through what had happened. The victim was a John Doe, who appeared to have been dead for at least a week. The cave where he had been discovered was at a secluded end of the beach that people rarely visited, especially in winter.

"Hey Lisbon, look at this"

Lisbon apologised to the officer she was talking to and wandered over to where Jane was calling for her, further into the cave.

"Pretty shell huh?" he held up a large shell with a marbled pattern.

"You called me over to show me a shell?" she asked, eyebrows raised.

"Oh no, I just spotted that. I called you over to show you this"

He pointed to something behind the large rock beside him, and she shuffled closer to get a look.

"Is that-?"

"Yup, a skull" Jane confirmed.

"Officer" Lisbon called "I think you need to get some CSIs over here, we may have another victim…"

The discovery of a second body meant over an hour of waiting around for the to CSIs return. With some more careful searching they discovered a few more bones further back in the cave, seeming to belong to the same body as the skull. By this point it was gone 5, and Lisbon decided that they were going to have to stay overnight.

"Van Pelt, find us some rooms in a nearby motel" she directed "Jane and I will go and talk to the kids who found the victim, text me the motel address when you get one"

"Sure boss"

Lisbon motioned for Jane to follow her and started to make her way out of the cave, stepping over the police tape.

"What grand plans are you missing out on this weekend then Lisbon?" Jane asked as he caught up with her.

"Oh you know, just stuff" she shrugged.

"Let me guess…laundry, jogging, shooting range and a movie?"

"Is that all you think I do in my spare time?" she shot back.

"I know that's all you do in your spare time" he told her.

"I do other things too. Like seeing people"

"When was the last time you saw a friend? And one you saw through law enforcement doesn't count"

"Two weeks ago" she lied.

"Oh really?" he shot her a look, clearly seeing straight through her lie "who is this friend?"

"My college roommate, Rebecca"

Now that was true, she had had a college roommate called Rebecca who she was still good friends with and met up with from time to time. The last time she had seen her however, was over a year ago.

"What did you do?" Jane smirked, enjoying her attempts to lie.

"Lunch, I had a pasta salad"

"Liar"

"Oh whatever, it's not like you socialise outside of the CBI either"

"And I've never tried to deny it" he pointed out as they reached Lisbon's SUV.

The group of 12 and 13 year olds they found at the police station shed little light on the case, just as Jane had predicted. They'd come across the cave and wandered inside, discovering the body. They'd politely answered all of the questions Lisbon asked but it was clear that they just wanted to be out of there. Lisbon let them go after twenty minutes, and then rung Van Pelt.

"Hi boss, I texted you the motel address" Van Pelt told her, assuming that was why she was calling.

"Yeah I got it thanks, did you manage to get an ID on the victim yet?"

"Not yet. I've run a search on missing persons but nothing has come up, I guess we'll just have to wait for the coroner's report and hope that the dental records will give us an ID"

"Did you get anything else at the crime scene?"

"No"

"Ok, we'll be there in half an hour"

She hung up and sighed. She felt bad that the rest of her team were most likely going to lose their whole weekends to this case, now that they had two nameless bodies and no idea if they were even connected. She wasn't so bothered about missing out on her plans (as Jane had so irritatingly guessed them correctly), but she was sure that the others had better things to do.

They ordered takeaway and sat around Van Pelt's hotel room as they ate it. She'd set up her computers on the desk, and they had spread out all the information they had on the case on the floor. There was little they could do until they had an ID though, so once they had finished eating Lisbon called it a day and headed to her own room.

She was exhausted, both physically and emotionally. Once she'd changed into her oversized jersey, she dug into her bag and found the sonogram she had been given that morning. She'd put off thinking about it all day, but now she was alone and able to look at it and reflect upon its enormity. She traced her finger over the small bean-like shape absentmindedly, trying to imagine that this tiny thing was actually growing inside her right that minute. Although she had tried to hide it from Jane, she had actually been quite nervous about the appointment that morning. What if something had gone wrong and she had miscarried? Despite how petrified she'd been at the concept of pregnancy a few weeks ago, the idea of losing this delicate tiny life was horrible. She wondered if Jane had felt the same, if that's why he had been so quiet and off in the waiting room, but she couldn't quite work it out. Maybe she was overanalysing it.

She was distracted from her thoughts by a gentle knock at the door.

"Lisbon?" Jane's voice floated through, and she climbed off the bed to answer it, not bothering to hide the sonogram in her bag.

"I just had a thought…" he began, stopping as he spotted her attire.

He had only seen her dressed like this once before, and at the time he had been so worried about proving her innocence he hadn't had a chance to take in the sight as much as he'd have liked. Now, he was so captivated by the sight of her that he couldn't remember why he had even come to see her.

"Jane?" she asked, waving a hand in his face.

"I…uh sorry" he muttered, stepping into the room "I was just thinking, about the case, that…" he trailed off again.

Lisbon closed her room door and frowned at him. Then her eyes followed his gaze to where it had frozen, focussed on the photo she had left lying on her bed. The combination of seeing Lisbon dressed in her jersey and realising that she'd been looking at the sonogram of _their_ child was too much for him to contemplate at once. Suddenly he wished that he could just take her in his arms, shower her in kisses and tell her properly how much she meant to him. It was getting so frustrating, watching her from a platonic distance, wishing all the time that he had the courage to tell her how he felt about her (and not deny it this time) but always being just a little too scared to act on it. Had they not slept together maybe he would have found the courage to do it, but every time he thought about proclaiming his love for her he was confronted by two memories. The first was her reaction when she woke up the next morning, the horror of what they had done hitting her full on as she ordered him to leave. He had stood outside her apartment for ten minutes, wanting desperately to go back in but knowing that it wasn't the sensible thing to do. Sometimes he wondered what would have happened if he'd gone back, whether things would have been better or even worse. The second memory was of the following Monday, when she looked him in the eye and said ' _we both made a mistake_ ' and that they should never talk of it again. That had hurt even more than the first, since she'd had time to think about it and still regretted it.

"Jane? Are you ok?" he was pulled back to the present by Lisbon's concerned voice "You seem really out of it tonight"

"Yeah, sorry" he muttered finally.

"What was it you were saying about the case?"

"It doesn't matter" he shrugged.

"So you came all the way over to my room just to tell me that you have an unimportant thought about the case, and now you're not even going to tell me what it is?" she raised her eyebrows at him.

"Pretty much" he shrugged, shooting her his 'apologetic grin'. Actually he'd come over with the intention of shedding some light on an element of the case, but he had absolutely no idea what it had been, nor did he care when he had Lisbon standing in front of him in a dangerously short jersey.

They stood there in silence for a few moments. Jane was contemplating how she would react if he kissed her right now. In turn, Lisbon was wondering why for once in his life Jane had nothing to say, and why he was staring at her with such intensity.

Lisbon finally broke the silence.

"If you won't tell me then would you mind letting me get some sleep?"

"I will, I just…" Jane paused, searching for a reason to stay in her room whilst he tried to pluck up the courage to do something.

"You're just what Jane? I'm tired and we're stuck in a motel hours away from Sacramento" Lisbon was starting to get annoyed now, and Jane was still just _standing_ in front of her.

"Sorry, I'll go"

He reached out and pulled open the door, finally seeming to come back to reality.

"Night Lisbon" he said softly, leaning forward and pressing his lips to her cheek.

She stared after him as he wandered down the corridor to his own room, her mouth falling ever so slightly open and her fingers unconsciously touching her face where he had just kissed her.

She was sure his lips had rested on her skin just a fraction of a second more than was normal between friends, but it was enough for her to spend the next hour tossing and turning in bed and wondering about it. A few times she had considered going down the hallway to his room, but she wasn't sure what to say to him. She wasn't sure what she wanted at all actually. She had spent the past 3 months trying to pretend that their night together hadn't happened (despite occasionally reliving it in her dreams, amongst other occasions), and when that had no longer become an option, she'd decided to view it as a one night thing – a mistake, as she'd put it to him. But after how she had felt this morning leaving the doctor's, and the way he'd looked at her just now before kissing her cheek…all she wanted to do deep down was push him up against a wall and kiss him senseless and let him have his way with her.

With a loud groan she flopped onto her front and buried her face in the pillow. At this rate she wasn't going to get any sleep, so she decided to go for a wander to try and clear her mind a bit. Since it was nearly 11 she didn't bother to change out of her jersey, and simply slipped her feet into some sneakers she kept in her go-bag and put her thick coat on. It was still quite chilly at night in March, and she pulled her coat around her as she stepped out of the motel reception. She took a seat on one of the benches outside and enjoyed the cool air blowing gently across her face, and the calming lull of a main road somewhere nearby. She could feel her frazzled mind slowly calming itself down as she breathed in the fresh air. Although she was used to the noise and business of Sacramento, it was quite relaxing to be in the quiet for a change. She heard the reception door open and close behind her but didn't bother to turn round. She heard the soft footsteps heading across the gravel, and it wasn't until they came to a halt a few metres away from her that her cop instincts kicked in and she tuned around.

"Jane?"

 _Brilliant. Apparently bothering her in her thoughts wasn't quite enough._

"Lisbon?" He pretended to act surprised to see her there, even though he'd known it was her from stepping out the door.

"What are you doing out here?"

"Just getting some air" he explained, stretching out his arms and taking a deep breath through his nose "weren't you going to sleep?"

"I couldn't" she shrugged, noting that he was still dressed in his suit pants and shirt but with no vest or jacket.

He nodded slowly and then came to sit on the bench beside her, surveying the motel car park and worn down grass around it. He was trying his hardest to keep his eyes away from her exposed legs, and focussed his gaze on her worn out sneakers as a compromise.

"They're my old running ones" she explained, catching him staring at them "have you come out here to tell me that insight you had on the case?"

Jane chuckled slightly.

"I'll tell you that in just a minute" he said, suddenly making his mind up about something.

"You've built it up quite a lot now" she joked, no longer annoyed that he hadn't told her.

She turned to look at him in the darkness and he decided that this was his moment. He reached out a hand and cupped the side of her face, stroking her cheek lovingly with his thumb. Lisbon froze, unsure of what he was doing but at the same time not wanting him to stop. Then he leant towards her and touched his lips against hers, so softly she wasn't even sure if he had actually done it. He paused for a moment, his lips merely an inch from her own, and then leant in again, this time with certainty. The second time their lips touched Lisbon responded, sliding towards him on the bench and slipping her arms around his neck and she kissed him back gently. It was soft and loving – nothing like the passion and urgency of the previous time they had kissed. Lisbon parted her lips ever so slightly and he slid his tongue in, and immediately the kiss stopped being tender and romantic and turned into something with much more desire. Jane kissed her hungrily, pausing his assault on her mouth only to press kisses down her neck before returning to nibble her lip slightly. His slid his other hand into her hair and stroked the soft tresses as he pulled her nearer to him. Lisbon moaned slightly as he sucked on her bottom lip, the sound going straight to his already hard cock.

After a few minutes they were forced to stop for breath. Jane leant his forehead against Lisbon's and let out a deep sigh.

"You have no idea how much I've been wanting to do that" he admitted softly.

She didn't respond, so he leant away from her slightly to look at her face. She looked beautiful; her hair was mussed slightly from his touch, her eyes were wide and dark with desire, and her bottom lip was slightly swollen. Her jersey had ridden up slightly as she had moved along on the bench, and the pale skin of the thigh almost shone in the semi darkness. He returned his gaze to her face, and caught a glint of moisture in her eye.

"Teresa?" he asked gently, and she blinked rapidly.

"Jane we can't – we just can't" she told him, tugging her jersey down and wrapping her coat around herself again.

"We can't what?"

"Be together, kiss, whatever it was that you were trying to tell me just now"

"Well why can't we? Don't tell me you didn't enjoy that?"

She remained stubbornly quiet, but averted his eyes.

"Teresa, listen to me; I lo-"

"Stop it" she said loudly, cutting him off before he could finish the sentence that might just push her over the edge "just stop it" she repeated more quietly.

"Please, can you just-"

"I'm going back to bed" she said, cutting him off again "night"

She stood up and walked away, blinking away the tears that threatened to escape. Jane remained on the bench and watched her leave, feeling as if she had reached into his chest and pulled out his heart. On a less literal level that was more or less what she had just done, but for once Jane didn't know exactly why.


	9. Chapter 9

**This is a bit of a 'Lisbon tells everyone' chapter but I feel its necessary** **Thanks for all your lovely reviews, they mean so much to me!**

A week after the case in Santa Cruz, Lisbon decided that she had to bite the bullet and tell the team. She and Jane hadn't spoken about their kiss outside the motel, but he had made no effort to bring it up, and she sure wasn't going to. She did however, force herself not to avoid him as she had after the last 'incident', and continued to drag him around with her to talk to suspects and relatives.

That Friday (as she reached exactly 12 weeks), she told the team to meet at O'Malley's after work. She tried to busy herself with paperwork all day (they had closed their latest case that morning), not thinking about how she would tell them, or what their reactions might be. By 5 she had run out of excuses to put it off any longer, and she was feeling guilty for holding the team up on their Friday night.

"Shall we go?" she asked them as she locked up her office, pretending not to have noticed that they had all packed up half an hour earlier.

"Yes" Van Pelt smiled at her and made her way towards the elevator, the rest of the team following "wait, where's Jane?"

"Just coming" his voice sounded from behind them. He'd stopped by the kitchen to put his mug away. He grinned at them all, catching Lisbon's eye and giving her a reassuring wink, to which she rolled her eyes with a smile and turned around.

"I need to tell you all something" Lisbon began nervously, as the team sat down at a table at O'Malley's. They looked expectantly at her, Jane included; he was intrigued to see what she would say in response to the inevitable questions about her child's paternity.

"I'm pregnant" she said quickly, worried that if she put it off much longer she might not be able to say it. Van Pelt smiled widely and immediately congratulated her, Rigsby looked surprised, and Cho let the corners of his mouth turn a little "It's just between us so far" she added "so don't mention it to anyone else"

"Of course not" Van Pelt replied, still smiling "so how far along are you? Who's the father? It's not Walter Mashburn is it?"

Lisbon blushed slightly at the last remark. She hadn't realised that her short-lived relationship with Walter was common knowledge.

"Only 12 weeks"

Van Pelt nodded, clearly waiting for a response to her second question.

"And as for the father, it's-" she paused "it's Jane's" she finished quietly.

"James?" Van Pelt frowned, she wasn't aware her boss was dating anyone currently.

"Jane" Lisbon corrected her, watching as the penny fell.

Funnily enough Jane looked more shocked than anyone else. He had had no idea that she was going to tell them that straight away, he had assumed that she'd put it off for a few months at least.

"Jane, as in our Jane?" Rigsby asked, looking rapidly between the two of them.

"Yes, our Jane" Lisbon confirmed, meeting his wide and questioning eyes.

"Well congratulations" Van Pelt burst out "I had no idea you were together! Especially now the rules have been updated and-"

"Oh, we're not together" Lisbon cut in quickly and corrected her. Rigsby's eyes widened slightly, and even Cho looked slightly shocked.

"I'll go and get some drinks" Lisbon said, looking for any excuse to get away from the table for a bit.

"Well you two both owe me twenty bucks" Rigsby muttered to Van Pelt and Cho as soon as his boss was out of earshot "are you and Lisbon really not together?" he added to Jane.

"Really not" Jane replied, still staring at the place Lisbon had just vacated.

"So how did this, well, happen?" Rigsby pressed.

"What?" Jane's head snapped round to look at him.

"You and Lisbon…you know, sleeping together"

"After the Christmas dinner" Jane explained, after checking that Lisbon was safely at the bar.

"I knew there was something going on!" Van Pelt said excitedly "I was sure she was avoiding you after that, I just assumed you'd pissed her off"

Jane nodded and forced his mouth to smile at her, but unable to bring himself to actually reply. He was still shocked that she had told them. He had never expected that to happen, not for another month at least. He looked over to the bar again where he caught Lisbon glancing nervously at him. He smiled, and she shot him a grin back. He turned back to the team, noticing that Rigsby's eyes were also on Lisbon. Jane frowned, and then smiled as he worked out what he was doing.

"She's not showing yet, Rigsby"

"Huh?"

"I can see you looking and wondering how you managed to miss it, but it's not that hard to do. I didn't notice either, not until she told me"

"Oh" Rigsby looked down at the table.

"Do you know the gender yet?" Van Pelt asked excitedly.

"Not for another few weeks" Jane answered "assuming Lisbon wants to know that is. I don't mind either way"

"Oh"

Van Pelt looked carefully at Jane. He didn't show any signs of being a man celebrating the existence of his child. In fact, she thought that he looked worried more than anything. It couldn't be to do with Charlotte could it? They had all watched how he had changed following Red John's death. He was so much happier and relaxed. Maybe he wasn't quite so at peace as she had thought, maybe this child had just thrown him right back to the first time he was expecting a child.

"Here you go"

She looked up to see that Lisbon had returned to the table. She handed out the 4 beers, and took a seat to sip her own lemonade. They sat in an awkward silence for a few moments, all trying to think of something to say. Rigsby's gaze continued to flicker between Jane and Lisbon, who were sat side by side. Cho was staring down at his beer, looking as relaxed as he ever did. Van Pelt bit her lip, worrying about how Jane might react if this child turned out to be another girl.

"So" Lisbon began, unable to take the silent intensity of the situation "it's nice to have a case-free weekend for a change"

"Yup" Rigsby nodded "lots of…free time"

"Hmmm" Jane nodded "lucky that I worked out that the sister was sleeping with the fiancé in time"

"Uh huh" Rigsby nodded "how did you work that one out again? You never told us"

"It was obvious really. He was clearly lying about his alibi, but he had a different type of guilt than someone guilty of murder. Therefore, he must have been sleeping with someone he shouldn't – in this case, his fiancé's sister"

 _Sleeping with someone he shouldn't._

The relevance of Jane's words sunk into Lisbon, but thankfully nobody else seemed to have picked up on them. Did he think he shouldn't have slept with her? She had definitely thought that to start with. In fact, she had thought that up until last weekend when he had suddenly kissed her. And it was the type of kiss that left no ambiguity that he had wanted her. So what did he want now? Did he just want to sleep with her again (from what she remembered, the first time had been amazing), or did he want something more? She snuck a glance at the man beside her. He was busy explaining something about micro-expressions to the team, probably in an attempt to alleviate the awkwardness of them finding out that their boss was now pregnant with their consultant's child. No, he was in love with his wife. He was attracted to her, Lisbon, and it was obvious that he did feel something for her, but he would never love anyone else as much as he had loved his wife. Were she not pregnant, maybe she would have settled for being his 'second best', but now that she had her baby's happiness and security to worry about she couldn't let that happen. Her child would grow up with two parents who got on well, and who loved it to pieces. She didn't want its upbringing to be tainted by insecurities and tension, even if it meant sacrificing her own possible happiness.

She looked around the table. The awkwardness had gone; they were chatting happily about a case a few weeks ago, whilst Cho took a twenty out of his wallet and for some reason gave it to Rigsby. She frowned in confusion at that, but ignored it. Her team were her family, and just like she wouldn't let her and Jane taint her child's upbringing, she wasn't going to let it taint her team's relationship either.

"You should all go home, enjoy your Friday night" she said suddenly, smiling at them.

"Boss?" Van Pelt asked.

"I've told you what I needed to, you don't all have to feel like you have to stay and try and pretend everything is normal. Go home, enjoy your weekends. You don't know when the next one you'll get might be"

None of them moved.

"I think what Lisbon's trying to tell you is that she's really tired and wants an excuse to go home and sleep" Jane said.

"No" Lisbon glared at him "that's not what I-"

"Sorry Boss, of course you're tired" Van Pelt broke in "and you're right, we haven't had a whole weekend for weeks"

"Yeah, I need to pick Ben up actually" Rigsby added "congratulations boss – both of you actually"

"Thanks Rigs"

Van Pelt and Rigsby said their goodbyes and left together. Cho followed them, muttering congratulations and even smiling at them. Jane and Lisbon were left alone at the table.

"Why did you tell them I was tired?" she demanded.

"Because they weren't going to admit that there was anything awkward and leave. Besides, you are tired"

"I'm not tired" she replied crossly.

"Yes you are, I can tell. Go home, have one of your nice long bubble baths and snuggle up in your sweatpants to watch some mindless TV"

 _How does he know I have long bubble baths?_

"I'll go home, but I'm still not tired" she maintained.

"That works too" he conceded, knowing that she wouldn't back down even though they both knew he was right.

"Well, night then" she stood up to leave.

"Goodnight, have a nice weekend"

She picked up her bag and started to walk away.

"And Lisbon?" he called after her.

"Yes?"

"Thanks for…well telling them, that its mine I mean"

"It's the truth" she said simply "see you on Monday, Jane"

He watched her walk away with a slight feeling of sadness. He wanted to race after her, kiss her, take her home and run her a big bath and make sure she relaxed. Instead he finished his beer and strolled out.

By the time Lisbon made it to 18 weeks, she was becoming increasingly aware that she had started to show. She also found that she was feeling amazing compared to how she had felt for the first 3 months. The nausea had completely subsided, and any extra fatigue she had felt was long gone. Jane was continuing to behave (how he was managing to overcome his usual need to cause trouble, she had no idea) and the rest of the team had already come to accept the news and act with normality about it. She'd told Gable about her pregnancy the previous week, and it was fair to say that he'd looked more shocked than anyone when she had explained that Jane was the father. Besides the inevitable awkwardness of that particular conversation with her boss, he'd reacted fairly well, and was happy to let her take time off for appointments or anything else she might need. That morning she and Jane arrived at the doctors for her second sonogram.

"Morning Lisbon" he called to her as she arrived outside the door, having been waiting for her on a bench nearby.

"Hi" she greeted him, as he stood up to follow her in.

They only had to wait for a few minutes before they were called through into the darkened room. Lisbon was feeling much less nervous this time, and Jane seemed relaxed as ever.

"Before I start, there are a couple of things I need to check" the technician began as they took their seats in the room. Lisbon nodded for him to continue.

"At this stage we should be able to tell you the gender, is this something either of you wanted to know?"

Jane and Lisbon looked at each other. Lisbon vaguely remembered that her doctor had said something about gender at her latest appointment, but she had forgotten to mention it to Jane, who presumably knew from past experience anyway.

"I assume you haven't discussed this" the technician said, noting their conflicted expressions "I'll um, step out for a minute to let you talk about it"

"I completely forgot to ask you" Lisbon admitted "what do you think?"

"I don't mind, whatever you want"

"I kind of want to know" Lisbon said "if you don't mind that is, it just feels weird calling it 'it' all the time"

"Then we'll find out" Jane smiled at her.

"Are you sure?"

"Completely" he reached over and squeezed her hand.

The technician stepped back in, having heard the room go quiet from outside.

"We would like to know the gender" Lisbon told him, shooting a smile at Jane.

"Ok. Secondly, I know you said you didn't want to be screened at a previous check-up, we just wanted to check that that was still the case?"

That was something else that Lisbon hadn't mentioned to Jane. She had decided almost immediately that as long as her baby was healthy, nothing would cause her to change her mind about having it. There was a risk involved with screening, and she simply didn't think it was worth it.

"No" she responded, purposely avoiding Jane's glance.

"Righty, let's get on with this then"

Lisbon lay down on the examination table, feeling almost embarrassed for both Jane and the technician to see her rounded stomach, even though it was entirely natural. The technician rubbed the gel on again, and a few minutes later the image appeared on the screen. Lisbon was amazed how much like a baby it looked already, being able to see its head and limbs.

"Everything looks fine" the technician reassured them "I can't quite tell which gender from this angle though…"

Lisbon and Jane waited patiently as he moved the rod across Lisbon's stomach for a few more minutes.

"There we go" he muttered "you've got a healthy little girl in there"

"A girl?" Jane repeated.

"Yep" the technician confirmed.

Lisbon turned her head slightly to look at Jane. He was smiling at the screen; he didn't seem at all upset about the fact that he was expecting another girl. Maybe her previous concerns about bringing back bad memories of Charlotte had been unnecessary. He hadn't noticed her looking at him, so she turned quickly back to the screen, wanting to take in as much of sight of her _daughter_ as she could. All too soon the screen was turned off and the sticky gel removed from Lisbon's stomach. The technician handed Jane a pair of the ultrasounds as she pulled her top back down and got up from the table.

Jane and Lisbon left the building in silence, and walked out to their respective cars.

"I'll see you at work then" Lisbon told him as she dug her keys out of her bag.

"Bye Lisbon"

As soon as she returned to the office Lisbon was greeted by Van Pelt, eager to know how it had gone. Lisbon answered briefly, and then decided to get her copy of the sonogram out of her bag and handed it to Van Pelt to look at. Cho and Rigsby acted indifferent at first, but as soon as their boss stepped into her office to put her bag down they headed over to Grace to take a look.

"I remember when Sarah and I found out we were having a boy" Rigsby reminisced "I was petrified, knowing how my dad had been"

"Oh shush, Ben is lucky to have you" Van Pelt swatted him good-naturedly "I wonder what they'll call her"

"So do I Grace" Jane replied, having just arrived.

"Jane! Lisbon just told us" Van Pelt gushed.

"Where is she?"

"Her office I think, didn't you come back together?" she frowned.

"We took different cars" he explained, already turning away from them to look for Lisbon.

He found her sitting at her desk, staring absentmindedly at the closed file in front of her.

"You ok Lisbon?" he asked, taking a seat on her couch.

"I'm fine" she replied quickly.

"Teresa"

She looked up at the use of her first name, straight into Jane's 'x-ray' look as she liked to call it.

"Ok…should I have asked you about the screening thing? I mean it's your child - your daughter, as well"

Lisbon had long since given up trying to pretend nothing was wrong when Jane fixed her with that particular look.

"You were worried about that?" Jane looked surprised "I'm perfectly happy without you screening, as long as she's healthy"

"Oh, ok"

Lisbon's eyes dropped back to the file in front of her and she opened it, pretending to scan the first page.

"I did actually have something to ask you, Lisbon"

"Mm hmm"

"I know this will sound crazy, but just hear me out" he began "but I think that maybe we should think about moving in together"

"What?" Lisbon's head jerked up.

"Hear me out" he repeated "it'll make things a lot easier for you in a few months time, and as soon as she's born then we can both look after her when she's waking throughout the night and you're exhausted"

"But" Lisbon racked her brain for protests "but I won't have a spare room, I've only got two bedrooms and one will have to turn into a nursery"

"Which is why I was going to suggest that you come and live with me. I've got enough rooms, and it's nearer to work" Jane replied calmly.

"But-"

"Just think about it Lisbon" Jane cut her off before she could think up another objection.

Thankfully Van Pelt took this moment to knock on the office door, coming to return the sonogram. Seemingly unaware of the tension in Lisbon's office, she placed the sonogram on the desk and thanked Lisbon for letting her look at it. Jane took the opportunity to slip out of the office.

Lisbon stayed in her office for the rest of the day, mulling over what Jane had asked her. Sure, it made sense logistically for them to live together. They would be able to equally share the responsibilities, as well as Jane being able to spend a lot more time with his child than if they continued living as they did now. It would also mean that her daughter would be able to have two parents to bring her up, instead of living with her mother and seeing her father every few days. The main thing holding her back was that the idea of living with Jane petrified her. It was a struggle working with him sometimes, how on earth would she cope if she was living with him as well? And didn't moving in together seem a bit…couple-y?

The pros and cons bounced back and forth in her mind all day, distracting her too much to get much work done. By the end of the day she had come to a conclusion. Whether or not moving in was Jane was a good thing for her was irrelevant; she knew that it would be better for her child, and that was what mattered most to her. Perhaps she was more sensitive to something like this than most as a result of her own childhood, she mused. As far as she was aware, Jane's childhood had left much to be desired in the parents department as well, which was maybe why he was so keen to create as 'normal' a situation as possible.

She found Jane dozing on his couch that evening and told him. He looked a little surprised that she had made her mind up so quickly, but pleased nonetheless. They decided that it was best that she had moved in properly by the time she reached the end of her second trimester, in a month and a half's time.

Lisbon returned home that evening feeling emotionally exhausted. She flopped down onto her couch with a sigh. She was much too tired to contemplate cooking dinner so ordered Chinese, thankful for the day she had decided to put her local takeout contact details on her phone so she didn't have to get up and search for the menu. After a few minutes of relaxation Lisbon sat up suddenly. There was a weird feeling inside her tummy, as if someone had just poked her from the inside. She put a hand tentatively on her swollen stomach as she felt it again. It was different this time, more gentle; like someone was blowing bubbles against her uterus lining. It was bizarre, but strangely comforting to feel the movement inside her. She moved her hand around to the side, trying to see if she could feel the movement from the outside as well. As it came near to where the movement had been, it stopped suddenly. Lisbon removed her hand slowly, and she felt something shift slightly inside her. That was her baby, _her daughter_ , moving around inside her. Lisbon suddenly had the overwhelming urge to tell someone. This was such a special moment – more special than seeing the image on the sonogram, even – and she couldn't just sit here and keep it to herself. She picked up her phone from beside her and dialled.

"Lisbon?" Jane answered "are you alright?"

"I'm fine Jane – she's moving!"

"What?"

"She's moving" Lisbon repeated "I just felt her"

"She is?" Jane replied, suddenly realising who 'she' was.

"She's doing it again" Lisbon nearly jumped in excitement.

"Hold on, I'll come over. Cam you tell her to keep it up?" Jane replied, jumping to his feet from where he was sill dozing on the CBI couch.

"You can't feel it from the outside" Lisbon explained sadly.

"Oh"

"Sorry" Lisbon suddenly felt bad for disturbing him "I just wanted to tell you"

"Don't apologise Lisbon. I'm glad you did"

"Well, ok"

"I don't care if you call me at 3 in the morning to tell me that she turned over" Jane joked.

"I won't go quite that far" she yawned, remembering why she'd collapsed on the couch in the first place. "I'll let you go now"

"Night Lisbon, sleep well"

"Night Jane"

Lisbon hung up and put her phone down next to her again, smiling around her empty living room. A couple of second later her phone rung again, and she picked it up without even bothering to look at the caller; it was nearly always Jane.

"Hi Jane" she answered, smiling at how soon he'd called back.

"Reese?"

Lisbon frowned, that wasn't Jane.

"It's me, Tommy" the voice continued.

"Tommy? Sorry, I thought you were someone else" she apologised "how are you? I haven't heard from you in ages"

"I'm good, really good actually" he replied.

"And Annabeth – sorry, Annie?"

"She's fine, what about you sis?"

"I'm good, how come you're calling? There's nothing wrong is there?"

"Jeez, can I not just call my big sister to say hi?" Tommy joked "actually I do have something to ask, Annie's got a week off school in a few weeks' time and she wanted us to come and visit her aunt for a few days, since we haven't seen you in so long"

 _Trust Tommy to pull the 'we haven't seen you in so long' card already._

"That would be nice; I could probably book a day off work and we can have a long weekend" Lisbon suggested, quickly calculating how many days leave she had to take.

"There's room for us to crash in your apartment right? I can get a hotel if we need it, but-"

"I've got a spare room" Lisbon reassured him, and then something hit her: she probably wouldn't be living here in a month's time. That thought was quickly displaced by another, much scarier one: she hadn't told her brothers that she was pregnant. _Shit_. How could she have not told them? She had meant to not long after she told the team, but she'd just never got round to it. Or she'd never plucked up the courage, more like.

"Actually Tommy" Lisbon began, already bracing herself for what was to come "I uh, there's something I need to tell you"

"You haven't got married and not told us have you?" Tommy asked suddenly.

"What? Married?" she spluttered "no I'm not married. I'm actually, well, pregnant"

There was silence from the other end of the line.

"Tommy? Are you there?"

"You're pregnant? You're not just messing with me are you Reese?"

"No, I'm not" Lisbon replied calmly.

"Congratulations then sis. Wow, I didn't even know you had a boyfriend, let alone this"

Tommy sounded like he was reacting fairly well to the news. Then again, he had called her at the age of 20 to tell her that his ex-girlfriend had turned up left him with their child he didn't know he had. Lisbon actually considered lying to him for a moment, and telling him that her and Jane were together just to save herself further questioning from her brothers. She had no doubt that Jane would relish in the opportunity to embarrass her when Tommy and Annie came to stay and they were forced to act the happy couple for a weekend.

"I don't have a boyfriend" she admitted, knowing that telling the truth would ultimately be the best option.

"Who's the father then? He'd better not be leaving you alone in this sis, or else I'll be right-"

"He's not leaving me alone Tommy" she cut in "he's being great actually"

"He'd better be. If he does anything to mess you around Reese, I'll be over there to sort him out"

Lisbon smiled at his fierce attempts to protect her honour, imagining Tommy marching up to Jane's door to demand exactly what he was doing with her.

"Thanks for the support, Tommy. I've got to go now" Lisbon lied "I'll ring up and sort out you and Annie coming sometime ok?"

"Bye Reese"

"Bye"

Lisbon sighed deeply. That has gone…well, better than expected. She'd always known that her brothers would get protective over the whole 'you're having a child with someone but you're not together' issue. Just as long as she could keep Jane's identity a secret until they'd calmed down enough not to try and kill him. Now she just had to ring her other two brothers and tell them, since Tommy was unlikely to last more than a day without telling them, and they'd go mental if they heard it from him first. This was going to be a long night…


	10. Chapter 10

"I'd put the crib here, the changing table over there and a standing closet here" Lisbon gesticulated around the empty room.

"But don't you want the closet right next to the changing table?" Jane pointed out.

"Oh" Lisbon paused "maybe you're right"

Three weeks had passed and Lisbon was in the process of moving her things over to Jane's apartment, since she had less than a week left in her own. Most of her things were now set up in what would be her room, save for her bed and her other bigger pieces of furniture. They were currently standing in what was going to be the nursery, discussing how they'd decorate the room.

"We are gonna paint in here right?" Lisbon asked "I was thinking a pale green? or anything a bit lighter really"

"Yeah red's not the most calming colour" Jane agreed "a pale green would be nice, or maybe blue"

"Or a warm white?" Lisbon suggested.

"We should get a little chair as well; we could put it in that corner"

"Oh, I better get going" Lisbon looked at her watch "it's getting late"

"You're welcome to stay, I'm happy to take the couch"

"I'm ok thanks, I'll go back and enjoy my last week of independent living" she joked.

Jane followed her out of the room, turning the light off and closing the door behind him. He was glad that they would be painting it a different colour, he'd never quite been happy with the red for obvious reasons, but having never decided what to do with the room he had never got round to repainting.

"Night Jane, see you tomorrow" Lisbon told him as she pulled her coat on, not even bothering to try and do it up over her swollen stomach.

"Bye Lisbon"

Despite her previous misgivings about living with Jane, the moving in process had been much easier than anticipated so far. Jane had even offered to let her have the bigger bedroom and move in to the spare room, but she'd refused. Aside from anything else, the spare room actually had a nicer view. She could cope without an en-suite since Jane had his own bathroom; meaning that the apartment's other bathroom would essentially be her own. She was still a little worried about living with someone else after having been completely independent for so long, but she would have to adapt. Would it really be that different? A bit less cooking and washing up probably, having someone to chat to in the evenings, and living nearer to work. All in all, not a bad deal, she thought.

Unfortunately, Lisbon's fourth to last night in her own apartment was cut short at 5am, when Gable rang to tell her that they'd just been assigned a new case. It was one of those mornings when Lisbon could really have done with a strong coffee, but she settled instead for a hot tea and a muffin. She arrived at the scene not long after, Cho being the only one who had arrived so far.

"Morning Cho, what do we know?"

"Hi Boss" he greeted her "male, late fifties. Blunt force trauma to his head, estimated TOD is sometime yesterday evening"

"Who found him?"

"His daughter. She came home at about 3; saw the light on in the kitchen"

Lisbon looked down at the body, splayed unnaturally on the floor with blood splattered everywhere.

"Poor girl" she muttered "coming back to find…this"

"Hi Cho, Boss" Lisbon heard from behind her, and she turned around to find that Van Pelt and Rigsby had arrived. She continued to be amazed that they still hadn't mentioned their relationship to anyone, despite the fact that it was blatantly obvious to all.

"Cho, you bring them up to date, then take Rigsby and talk to the daughter. Van Pelt, you go back to the office and start doing background checks" Lisbon ordered.

Lisbon wanted to start talking to neighbours and see if any of them had seen anything, but it was much too early to be knocking on doors. Instead, she went and spoke to the first officer on scene to try and work out exactly what they knew. Jane arrived 5 minutes later and looked around the house, but hadn't come up with anything so far. Well, not anything he felt like sharing with the team. They headed back to the CBI not long after, Lisbon intending to return and talk to neighbours as soon as it was socially acceptable.

"Boss" Van Pelt stuck her head round Lisbon's open office door a while later "I might have something"

Lisbon titled her head to indicate for her to come in.

"He and his wife are separated, but still married. She lives in New York, but her credit card activity suggests she's in Sacramento at the moment" Van Pelt explained "She could easily be a suspect – divorce settlements and all that"

"Do you know where she's staying? There were no signs of her staying at the house"

"I'm trying to find a hotel or something at the moment, but so far nothing's come up"

"Try looking into family, there might be someone who lives nearby who she's staying with" Lisbon suggested "actually take Jane and talk to the daughter, see if she knows anything. And could you tell Cho and Rigsby to go and talk to the neighbours? Find out if anyone saw or heard anything last night"

Lisbon had decided that she was better off staying in the office and sending her team out. She hadn't noticed how tired her back was until she'd been sitting down for a while, and the pain had slowly disappeared. Not keen for it to return, she spent the rest of the morning doing background checks – which was normally Van Pelt's job – and catching up on a little paperwork. Jane wondered into her office as soon as he got back with Van Pelt, placing Lisbon's sandwich from the fridge on her desk.

"Oh, thanks Jane" Lisbon said, slightly surprised "you didn't need to do that, I can still get up you know"

"I was walking past the kitchen anyway" Jane shrugged it off "how are you?"

"Fine" Lisbon said firmly "like I have been every other time you asked"

Jane didn't answer, taking a seat on her couch instead and undoing his own sandwich. They ate together in silence, with Lisbon carrying on with her paperwork between mouthfuls. Jane looked up when she suddenly went still, her hand going to her stomach.

"Lisbon?"

"She's kicking again" Lisbon said excitedly, moving her hand around to try and feel it.

Jane didn't need any invitation to jump up and cross the room.

"May I" he asked, reaching his hand out tentatively.

Lisbon rolled her eyes and grabbed his hand, placing it on the side of her stomach.

"Um Lisbon" Jane said quietly, after a few second "I can't feel anything"

"Hold on, she'll do it again in a minute"

They remained still for a moment, Jane suddenly becoming very aware of how close he was to Lisbon. Her hair was tickling his chin; he could so easily just tilt his head down and kiss the top of her head… He felt a sudden movement under his hand.

"Did you feel that?" Lisbon asked, sounding slightly concerned.

"Yeah" Jane muttered.

He kept his hand on her stomach for a few more moments, until the movements stopped. Apparently his daughter had found a more comfortable position. Realising the potential awkwardness of their proximity, Jane removed his hand and stepped away from Lisbon.

"I forgot how special that was" he admitted softly.

Lisbon nodded, and then picked up her sandwich and took another bite.

"Did you get anything from the daughter?" she asked suddenly.

"What?"

"The victim's daughter. The one you and Van Pelt went to see" Lisbon clarified.

"Oh, her" Jane nodded "she's in a state but she said her mother was in town, staying with her parents. Van Pelt has got the address"

Lisbon put the final bite of her sandwich in her mouth, and then stood up. Jane watched her as she left the office. He noticed that she'd swapped her normal heeled boots for flat sneaker style shoes, beneath the maternity black pants and loose shirt. Something about her looked so beautiful today, despite the slightly mismatched outfit. He had considered telling her that, but he was well aware that it would most likely just freak her out.

He watched her say something to Van Pelt, who handed her a slip of paper, and then walk back towards her office. Rigsby and Cho returned to the bullpen just as she was leaving, and she stopped to talk to them.

"Rigsby and I are going to talk to the victim's wife, are you coming?"

"I think I'll stay here and see what Grace's got, leave the proper police work to you"

That was clearly code for 'I'm going to snooze on my couch all afternoon and maybe bug Van Pelt a bit' but Lisbon let it pass.

"Suit yourself" she shrugged, grabbing her coat and bag.

To Lisbon's dismay, the victim's wife hadn't yet been informed that her estranged husband had been found dead that morning, so she had the task of giving her the news. The woman seemed weirdly unaffected by it, only showing any emotion when Lisbon mentioned that it had been her daughter who had found the body. She would have looked like the perfect suspect had she not had an alibi (which was immediately confirmed by her parents), and had there not been _something_ about her which didn't quite add up to her being the killer. Lisbon couldn't quite put her finger on it, but she just couldn't imagine this put together woman killing her husband in an angry frenzy.

"What do you think?" she asked Rigsby as she pulled away from the house.

"She had motive, her alibi could easily be faked, but…I don't quite see it" he admitted.

"No, me neither" Lisbon sighed, her left hand absentmindedly going to her stomach as she drove with her right.

"Grace is looking into that woman the neighbour mentioned" Rigsby told her "maybe she could be the killer"

"Maybe" Lisbon nodded, then frowned "ring Van Pelt, see if the wife had a partner or anything"

The rest of the ride back was in silence. Rigsby couldn't help but glance at his boss's swollen tummy every now and then, still not completely believing what had happened, despite having known about it for over two months now. Every now and then he wondered how everyone would react if Grace were to become pregnant. He subconsciously patted his left jacket pocket to check that the box was still there. He'd had the ring for over a week now, and he was yet to find the perfect moment to ask her. He was very aware that they hadn't explicitly told the rest of the team of their relationship, even though they knew that it was no secret. They had been planning to tell them, but then Lisbon's announcement had come up and they hadn't wanted to steal her thunder. Enough time had now passed that he felt like they could say something, but they kept putting it off for little reasons. Both of them knew they were avoiding it, and he wasn't entirely sure why.

A few days later, Lisbon locked her apartment door for the last time. She didn't feel particularly sad to be saying goodbye to it, seeing as she'd always seen it as more of a place to sleep and eat and less of a home. What she was feeling a little anxious about however, was the fact that she was now about to drive the last of her belongings to her new home – Jane's apartment. He had offered to come and help her bring the last of her things over that morning, but she'd refused. She sort of wanted to enjoy her last few hours of peace which he seemed to have understood, given how quickly he stopped trying to offer.

The delivery truck had already left when she arrived there, and Jane had somehow moved her bed and dresser into her room for her (she assumed he had had the help of the delivery driver). She hadn't really wanted to hire a truck when she was only moving halfway across town, but she simply wasn't able to fit some of her larger things into her car.

"Hi" Jane greeted her at the door, almost shyly.

"Hi, I've got the last few boxes in my car"

"I'll go get them" he offered "you go in"

"No, I'll take some"

She may be pregnant, but she was still capable of carrying a couple of boxes in.

It didn't take the two of them too long to arrange her bedroom furniture how she wanted it, and then Jane left her to unpack the rest of her belongings. He came up a couple of times in the afternoon to give her a cup of tea, but most of the time she was alone in her room, wondering how on earth it had reached the point that she'd moved in with Patrick Jane and was pregnant with his child. If someone had told her a year ago that she would find herself in this situation, she would have laughed at them.

There was a gentle knock at the door, and then it was pushed open.

"I was going to order takeout for dinner, is Thai ok?" Jane asked, looking around the room.

Lisbon realised a moment too late that the majority of her underwear was currently spread across the floor, as she attempted to organise her clothes.

"Thai's good" she replied, taking the menu he held out and looking through it "Chicken Kao Pad please"

Thankfully he left her alone again, and she quickly threw all of her lingerie into the top drawer of her dresser. She hung up the last of her clothes in the closet, and then she stood at the window and surveyed her handiwork. It looked good, if she was honest. She couldn't help but notice how much bigger it was than her old bedroom, and she could even see the river out of her window, instead of the concrete building she had been used to. She picked up the two mugs Jane had brought and padded down the hallway to the kitchen, finding it empty. She stuck her head into the living room, noting that her couch and armchair had joined Jane's own couch.

"Jane?" she called.

There was no response, so Lisbon walked back up the hallway and poked her head into the soon-to-be nursery. Finding it empty, Lisbon gave in and knocked gently on Jane's bedroom door. After no response, she pushed it open.

She was surprised at how normal a bedroom it was. She had seen his motel room, as well as the lumpy mattress that had lain beneath the red smiley face in his Malibu house, and aside from being fairly minimalist, this room held no similarities with either of those. This was light and airy, with a large bed in the middle and a built in closet. It had a bedside table that held a stack of books, a glass of water and a pair of glasses. _Who knew that Jane wore reading glasses?_ When she spotted the striped pyjamas folded neatly on the bed, Lisbon started to feel very much like she was intruding. This was Jane's personal space, and she was standing here gawking at it. She stepped out of the room, and quietly shut the door again. She wasn't sure why she was so affected after having seen Jane's bedroom, but she was.

When Jane returned, bearing takeout and a shopping bag, Lisbon was curled up on her couch in front of the TV. She'd changed into yoga pants and a loose t-shirt, and she lifted her head slightly and smiled as he walked in.

"I thought we could eat in here" he suggested.

"Sure" she agreed "I'll come and get some plates and stuff"

"I'll do it" he said quickly.

"Jane, can you stop treating me like I'm incapable?" she shot back quickly. She hadn't said anything about it for the past few days, but she'd had enough of being treated like she was too delicate to get up and do anything for herself.

"Sure, sorry" he responded quietly.

They ate their food in silence, and not long after Lisbon announced that she was going to bed. Jane sat alone in the living room for a while after she left. He wasn't entirely sure what he had expected when they lived together, but it wasn't this. It was like they'd taken a step back; they weren't acting like the good friends they were, but more like casual acquaintances. They were being _too_ polite to one another, and their usual flowing banter had turned to stilted conversation. He hoped it was just because they hadn't had time to get used to it yet.

After showering and changing, Lisbon lay in her bed in the unfamiliar room. This whole situation was weird. It wasn't just the fact that she'd moved in with Jane, but now the strange insight into his personal life. She had never really realised how far he'd come since Red John's demise.

She thought back to the time immediately after she had shot Jane's nemesis. Her life had been a complete mess for a couple of days, due to the media attention, trying to tie up the case that they had been working on for so many years, and Jane's sudden disappearance. He'd bid her goodbye when they left the building where it all took place, telling her that he'd be back and that he had some things to sort out. In reality, she'd assumed that that was it, that he was gone for good. Nobody had been more surprised than her when she had arrived at work a week later, to find Jane fast asleep on his couch. She'd had to pinch herself a few times to make sure it was real. It had been real however, and he had slotted back into CBI life like they'd never taken down the man who murdered his wife and child. The two of them had never really spoken about it, and given that he continued to wear his wedding ring, she knew deep down that he would never truly be over it. Was it even possible to get past such a huge element of your life? Still, that glimpse into his room today hadn't shown any signs of a man who had been through a 7 year trawl to hunt down the man who had brutally murdered his wife and child.

Jane and Lisbon's first domestic fallout took place three days after they had started living together. It was a Tuesday, and Lisbon had returned home late after a long day of getting nowhere with the same case that they'd been working on for over a week now. Jane had arrived home a little earlier, and had had time to make a tomato sauce and cook some pasta and vegetables for dinner. Lisbon gave him the silent treatment all evening, still annoyed at him after he had antagonised the victim's wife that afternoon. Still, they managed to eat their dinner in a cordial manner. It was later, when Lisbon went to put their empty tea cups in the dishwasher, when everything fell apart. Lisbon called Jane through to the kitchen, demanding exactly how he had managed to stack the dishwasher so badly. Jane's usual jokey replies had got too much for Lisbon, resulting in her screaming at him about his incompetence for several minutes before stomping off to her room and slamming the door.

She had wandered through to the kitchen the following morning looking sheepish, and had silently cooked him some scrambled eggs which he had the good sense not to give any suggestions for improvement on. They drove to work separately, as they had decided to do every day, and Jane decided that he was safer lounging on his brown leather couch in the bullpen rather than the cream one in Lisbon's office. That evening Lisbon cleared the table after they had eaten, and then gave in and apologised for overreacting so badly the previous night.

It was after just over a week of living together, that an unexpected visitor arrived in Lisbon's office. The team had just shared a takeout pizza lunch, after having finally closed the case that had plagued them for two weeks. Jane was sipping a cup of tea on the couch in Lisbon's office to avoid the noise of the bullpen (where Rigsby seemed to be running some sort of 'who can throw the paper in the trash?' competition), whilst Lisbon was content to sit and make a start on the paperwork from that particular case.

Jane paused suddenly, his cup halfway to his mouth, and the grinned widely. Lisbon noticed his odd movement from the corner of her eye, and looked up.

"What?"

"I think you have a visitor, Lisbon" he explained, getting to his feet "I should give you some privacy"

"What?" she repeated, now frowning.

Jane simply titled his head in the direction of the bullpen, and she spun around to look. Walter Mashburn was stood beside Van Pelt's desk, saying something that she was laughing politely at much to Rigsby's annoyance.

"Oh crap" Lisbon muttered, turning back and hunching over her paperwork in the hope that she wouldn't be spotted.

"Language" he smirked at her.

Jane pushed open her office door to leave, just as Walter walked away from Van Pelt's desk and towards the office.

"Walter" Jane greeted him "how nice to see you"

"Patrick" Mashburn responded "as always"

Lisbon sat at her desk and watched them interact for a few minutes as dread slowly filled the pit of her stomach. She didn't even bother to try and eavesdrop, she was probably better off not knowing. Finally, Jane wandered off to the bullpen and Walter stepped into her office.

"Teresa" he said, smiling widely "you look beautiful, as always"

Lisbon stood up from her desk to go and greet him, and watched his eyes widen with slight satisfaction as her tummy came into view.

"Walter, it's nice to see you"

"Wow" he said, his eyes glued to her stomach "so you're pregnant then?"

"It seems so" she stepped back from him and sank onto the side of her desk.

"I for one, am particularly sad to hear that you're taken"

Lisbon nodded and looked at the ground, not bothering to correct him.

"But not married?" Walter pushed, glancing at her hand.

"Not married" she confirmed.

"My chances haven't completely gone then" he chuckled "really Teresa, you look wonderful"

"Thanks. What are you doing here? Someone else trying to blow you up?" she joked.

"Not this time, thankfully" he smiled back "I was in the area and I thought I'd see if you were around for a coffee…or maybe dinner. I did try and call your apartment, but I couldn't get hold of you so I thought I'd drop by here"

"Oh sorry. I've moved" she explained.

"Ah, of course" he nodded "so do I get to know who the very lucky man is?" he motioned towards her stomach.

Lisbon smiled at him, racking her brain for any sort of answer. Apparently she didn't need to; her inadvertent gaze flick to the left seemed to be enough of an answer for Walter.

"Oh" his eyes widened in realisation "Patrick? Really? Wow…I didn't see that coming"

"Neither did I" she admitted.

"Well I'm…happy for you" he said finally "actually that's a bit of a lie, but I suspect that there's very little chance that you'll accept my invitation to dinner now so I can at least pretend. Unless…?" he raised his eyebrows hopefully.

"Thanks Walter, but I can't" she said firmly, trying not to roll her eyes at his continued attempts to take her out.

"That's a big shame. I would have liked to have a proper date with that damaged intensity of yours"

"Really?" she asked "you're still going on about my 'damaged intensity'?"

"As I said before, it's one of your many particularly attractive features"

"I've had better compliments" she grumbled.

"Some of my other compliments might be a little inappropriate for the office" he shot back, and Lisbon blushed.

"It was lovely to see you again, Teresa" he said after a moment "I should go"

"Good luck with…well, everything" she said.

He stepped forward and kissed her on the cheek. Lisbon felt his jacket brush her protruding stomach and tensed slightly.

"If things don't work out and you want to give me a call, I'd be more than happy to have that dinner sometime" he said softly as he pulled away.

"I'm fine for now, thanks" she smiled, slightly forcedly now "bye Walter"

"Goodbye Teresa"

Lisbon sank back down into her desk chair as soon as Walter was gone. It didn't take long until Jane came back to her office, still grinning away at what was obviously very amusing entertainment for him.

"Ah the joyous occasion of meeting an ex-lover" Jane said, sighing.

"Shut up"

 _Did_ _ **everyone**_ _know about that?_

"And Lisbon?" he continued.

"What?" she asked, glaring at him.

"Why does Walter seem to think we're a couple?"

Lisbon groaned and dropped her head onto the table.

"Because it was easier to let him believe that than try and think up another excuse not to go out for dinner with him" her response was slightly muffled by the papers "although now I'm starting to think that he could be better company this evening" she added.

"You do wound me so Lisbon"

"Oh, and you two need to work on making you conversations less…lip-readable" Jane added, dropping back onto the couch.

An orange that had previously been sitting on Lisbon's desk flew across the room and hit him on the shoulder.


	11. Chapter 11

**Sorry for the delay! Panic revision got in the way...**

 **Anyway I did the SAT and I can't tell if it went well or not. I feel like I could have got anywhere between 1400 and 1600…hopefully it's the latter!**

Tommy and Annie were due to land in Sacramento airport on Thursday evening. It was currently Thursday afternoon, and Lisbon was in a particularly bad mood. They were trying to close two cases, both of which appeared to have reached a dead end and Jane was yet to come up with one of his famous plans. She was feeling guilty for leaving her team for a long weekend with two cases going, but since she wasn't able to do much more than desk work then there was little point in her staying. Cho had reassured her that he would be more than capable of handling Jane for a day.

Thinking about Jane put her in an even worse mood. He was just being so irritatingly…nice. They'd argued for half an hour the night before over the sleeping arrangements for Tommy and Annie, when Jane refused point blank to allow Lisbon to sleep on the couch. Then he'd disappeared out for an hour and come back with a large blow up mattress and sleeping bag which he'd set up in the nursery for Annie (she didn't dare ask where he'd got it from when all the shops were long shut), and told her that Tommy would be staying in his room whilst he slept on the couch. Lisbon didn't bother to ask why it was ok for him to sleep on the couch but not her, knowing perfectly well that he would pull the 'you're pregnant' card, as well as the fact that he was well accustomed to sleeping on couches. To make matters worse, she had tossed and turned all night worrying about how Tommy would act towards Jane, the man who had knocked up his big sister, and somehow managed to sleep through two alarms when she finally got to sleep. Jane had come through and knocked on her door when she hadn't appeared by half seven, and she'd happily sipped halfway through the mug of decaf coffee he had brought her until she'd realised what the time was and shouted at him for not having woken her any earlier. And now, he had the audacity to leave her to fume in peace in her office whilst he demonstrated to Grace quite how many agents' wallets he could take without them noticing (leaving each wallet on its owners desk for them to discover before they even knew it was missing).

At about five Lisbon got up to get herself another coffee. Rigsby was in the kitchen, shooting nervous glances at Van Pelt as he prepared his own beverage.

"Hi Rigs" Lisbon greeted him, before opening the cupboard to find her favourite mug "have you seen my mug?" she asked, frowning at the cupboard.

"Your mug? No idea, sorry boss"

Lisbon pulled a few other mugs out of the way to check the back of the cupboard, realising that Rigsby kept glancing at her.

"What?" she demanded "I'm a detective Rigsby, what's up?"

"I uhh…well…I may have accidently dropped your mug this morning" Rigsby admitted, glancing repeatedly into the bullpen to see if anyone was coming to save him from his boss's wrath "I should have said, I just…"

"It's just a mug" Lisbon shrugged, taking a plain green mug out of the cupboard and placing it on the work surface with a little more force that necessary.

Rigsby jumped a little at the noise, and Lisbon spun around to glare at him.

"I'm not going to attack you, it's just a mug"

"Sure boss, I uh…I'll buy you a new one. Sorry"

"Don't worry about it" she told him, looking around the work surface for the decaf coffee.

She reopened the cupboard and narrowed her eyes at the shelf which contained multiple boxes of Jane's favourite teas. Finally, she found the tin labelled 'decaf' and grabbed it. She pulled the lid off, and then groaned loudly.

"What's up Lisbon?" Jane asked, stepping into the kitchen just in time to hear her groan.

"There's no decaf left" Lisbon explained. Rigsby took the opportunity to sidle out of the kitchen whilst Lisbon's attention was taken.

"I can run and get you some" Jane offered "or-"

"And my mug is broken" Lisbon continued "my back is killing me, this baby wouldn't stop kicking me all night and then I was late in this morning and the one thing I really needed right now was a huge mug of coffee but there's no decaf left and I'm not even allowed to _look_ at a cup of normal coffee any more"

Jane looked a little taken aback at Lisbon's outburst.

"Calm down Lisbon" he said slowly, soothingly "just take a breath, I'll go and get you a nice coffee from that vendor across the street"

"Oh you'd just love that, wouldn't you?" Lisbon muttered bitterly.

"What?" Jane frowned at her.

"You'd love to do something else to help poor, pregnant Lisbon because she's too fat to do anything for herself any more"

"Fat? You're not fat Lisbon, you're pregnant" he frowned a bit more, taking a step towards her.

"I'm too fat and too pregnant and I…I just-" she stuttered, blinking rapidly to hold back the tears that seemed to have suddenly appeared.

"Oh Lisbon" Jane murmured as he suddenly understood what was happening. He stepped forward and tried to embrace her around her stomach. She gave in and let her head rest on his shoulder as she attempted to regain control of her breathing and sniffed a few times.

"I'm sorry" she said, her voice muffled by his shoulder.

Jane shushed her and started to stroke her hair, noting that her breathing had become more even and the sniffing had subsided a little.

Van Pelt walked into the kitchen, froze at the sight of her boss crying into her consultant's embrace and then quickly turned and left. Neither of them noticed.

After a few minutes Lisbon lifted her head up and Jane loosened his embrace.

"Sorry" she repeated.

"Don't be sorry" he replied softly "now you're going to go home and have a nice long bath whilst I go and collect Tommy and Annie from the airport. No, don't even try and argue" he said, as Lisbon opened her mouth to say something.

"Fine" she said eventually, glaring at him slightly so that he knew that she wasn't entirely happy about it.

She sniffed one last time and then rubbed her eyes.

"You look fine" he told her, putting his hand on the small of her back and pushing her gently her out of the kitchen and past the bullpen to her office. Van Pelt shot her a concerned look as she passed.

When she got back to Jane's – no, their – apartment, Lisbon kept her word and ran herself a deep bath with lots of bubbles. Then she lay in the warm water and chatted absentmindedly to her daughter who kicked gently in response. She felt embarrassed for overreacting earlier that afternoon; it wasn't like her to break down in tears at work, especially over something as trivial as a mug. Yet again, Jane had just taken it in his stride and sorted everything out.

After her bath, Lisbon dressed in sweats and a jumper and set about making a Bolognese sauce. She had left it to simmer and settled down on the couch with a big mug of coffee (the one she had so desperately wanted earlier). It wasn't long before the calm atmosphere in the apartment was upset by the arrival of Tommy and Annie.

"Hi Tommy, Annie" she greeted them and was pulled into a bear hug from her brother.

"Reese, look at you!" he exclaimed "I mean I know you're pregnant…but you're really pregnant!"

"Yup, really pregnant" she nodded "how are you doing Annie?"

"I'm good" Annie nodded.

"Where did Jane go?" Lisbon asked, looking around with a frown "he did pick you up right?"

"He said he had to go and do something" Annie answered, not quite meeting her aunt's gaze.

"Are you hungry?" Lisbon asked, deciding to ignore whatever it was Annie was hiding from her "I made Bolognese"

"Bolognese? You didn't Reese?"

"Don't worry; it's nothing like that Bolognese Tommy"

Jane arrived back ten minutes later, just as Lisbon was putting the pasta on. When she opened her mouth to ask where he had gone, he simply held up a tub of ice cream and grinned at her. She couldn't help but smile back at him.

They all chatted amicably over dinner. Tommy told Lisbon all about his latest escapades as a Bounty Hunter, whilst Jane tried to teach Annie some common tells of lying. Jane cleared away the plates after the Bolognese and served everyone some of the ice cream he'd brought back.

"Have you decided where you want to go to college yet Annie?" Lisbon asked her niece.

"Maybe somewhere in California" Annie shrugged "I'm not sure yet"

"You've got plenty of time to decide"

"Hey Reese, do you remember George O'Fallon?" Tommy asked suddenly.

"George O'Fallon?" Lisbon frowned in thought.

"Really? You don't remember him?"

"No I…Oh" Lisbon's eyes widened in realisation as a light blush descended over her face.

"Anyway I saw him the other day. You'll never guess who he ended up marrying" Tommy continued, oblivious to the way Jane was now staring at his sister.

"Fran Matthews"

"Fran? No way, she was so…well…"

"I know right?"

"Who was George O'Fallon?" Jane asked, smiling at the blush on Lisbon's face.

"Uh, nobody"

"An ex-boyfriend…no, wait" Jane guessed "you didn't actually date, but he wanted to…aha! Lisbon's admirer" he finished triumphantly.

Lisbon ignored him and rolled her eyes. Tommy stared at Jane, slightly in awe of how he managed to work it out.

"Do you remember that time he turned up at our house with the massive bear?" Tommy asked, laughing "your face, sis; it was the funniest thing"

"Does anyone want more ice cream?" Lisbon asked.

"I think we all want to hear more about this George person" Annie shot back, earning herself evils from Lisbon.

"Yeah, I agree with Annie" Jane added.

"Sorry Reese" Tommy told her, not looking remotely apologetic.

They all headed off too bed not much later. Lisbon came through to the kitchen to get a glass of water, and found Jane making himself a cup of tea in his pyjamas.

"Hey" she greeted him.

"Hey"

She took a glass out of the cupboard and filled it with water.

"What?" she asked after a few sips, when she realised that Jane was staring at her.

"Nothing" he said quickly. A bit too quickly for Lisbon's liking.

"Stop staring at me like that, Jane" she told him "all…pitying and concerned"

"I'm not 'pitying and concerned'" he shrugged "I just want to make sure you're ok"

"I'm fine" she assured him "I just lost it earlier, I really liked that mug"

"It's not really about the mug though, is it Lisbon?"

 _No_ , Lisbon wanted to shout back, _it's all about you and how stupidly nice you're being, and how every day I'm struggling more and more to remember why I don't just give in and kiss you._

"It was a good mug" she said instead "Rigsby is so on dumpster duty for the next year"

Even though they both knew that she wasn't telling the truth, Jane decided just to leave it for now.

"Well goodnight Lisbon, goodnight baby" he patted her stomach affectionately.

"At some point we'll have to find something other than 'baby' to call her" Lisbon pointed out.

"Goodnight Gertrude" Jane amended, and Lisbon glared at him "Desdemona? Goneril? Hecat?"

"Where are you getting those from? Shakespeare?" Lisbon joked.

"Do you not appreciate the bard's name choices?" Jane replied, looking mock hurt.

"I'm not naming my daughter Goneril" Lisbon told him "it sounds like some sort of horrible illness"

"Ah well, it was worth a try"

"Night Jane, we'll sort out this whole naming thing another time" she yawned.

"Sleep well Lisbon"

Lisbon picked up her glass of water and left the kitchen. She heard Jane call 'night Goneril' after her, to which she rolled her eyes yet again.

"Don't worry baby" she murmured, patting her stomach "over my dead body will you be named Goneril"

Lisbon woke up early the next morning, noting the irony of how she had managed to sleep through two alarms the day before but had no problem waking up naturally on her day off. She stumbled down the hallway to the bathroom, not questioning the fact that the light was already on in there. She pushed open the door and was met by a wave of steam, which quickly cleared to reveal Jane wearing nothing but a towel around his waist and rubbing his hair dry with another.

"Jane?" she blinked, wondering if she was still dreaming (and if so, why was a half naked Jane in her dream?).

"Lisbon?" Jane spun around.

"What are you…why are…" she stuttered.

"Oh sorry, I never normally lock the door in my bathroom, I just forgot" he shrugged, as if he wasn't standing half naked in front of his boss with wet tousled hair "I'm finished anyway, it's all yours"

He picked up the neatly folded pile of clothes from on top of the toilet, and stepped past a dazed Lisbon. She shook her head and tried to rid her mind of the image of Jane.

She was entirely unsuccessful. When they had slept together she had been too inebriated to really notice Jane's body, now she had seen it properly she just couldn't forget it. His chest wasn't bursting with muscles, but it was smooth and toned and much more tanned than she had expected. His arms looked surprisingly strong, and his hair was all wet and ruffled and she wanted nothing more than to run her fingers through it… Maybe what shocked her most was how unlike his normal smart and put together self he looked, and worryingly, she really liked it.

There was a knock on the door, and Lisbon was jerked out of her reverie.

"Um Lisbon" Jane's muffled voice sounded from outside.

"What?" she snapped back, annoyed at him both for distracting her, and for giving her such thoughts in the first place.

"You're not having a shower are you? It's just that I may have forgotten that I have nowhere to change" he replied sheepishly.

"Just give me a minute" she answered, rolling her eyes "and go wait somewhere else than right outside the door"

She heard him pad down the hallway towards the kitchen, and a few seconds later she heard the kettle being turned on.

Lisbon finished in the bathroom and returned to her bedroom. She waited there until she heard the bathroom door click shut and knew it was safe to leave without encountering semi naked Jane again. Then she wandered down to the kitchen and made herself a coffee and sat down at the kitchen table to drink it. Decaf coffee would never be the same as normal, but she'd grown to quite like it the past few months.

"Hey Annie" she said as her niece walked into the kitchen.

"Hi" Annie yawned back.

"Did you want something to eat? We've got cereal, toast, eggs-"

"Scrambled eggs on buttered toast with…bacon" Jane cut Lisbon off as he walked in, holding his fingers to either side of his head as if he was trying to read Annie's mind.

"No" Annie shot back, smirking at him.

"Oh really? What then?"

"I don't like buttered toast"

"You do surprise me" Jane shrugged "Lisbon, the usual?"

"Jane, you should be leaving for work" Lisbon told him, crossing her arms and glaring at him.

"Ah they won't miss me for a bit"

He turned the hob on and placed a saucepan on top, putting a knob of butter in it.

"Jane!"

"She's just annoyed because she doesn't like me trying to read people's minds" Jane stage whispered to Annie, who giggled.

"You can't actually read people's minds can you?" Annie asked, narrowing her eyes at him.

"Sure, I do it to Lisbon all the time. Right now you're thinking…'god I hope Jane can't really read my mind because he'll know all about my secret boyfriend'"

Annie looked at the floor.

"Ah…interesting" Jane muttered "don't worry; Lisbon won't mention it to your dad"

Jane set about making breakfast and was just serving everything up as Tommy wandered in, yawning.

"Good morning Tommy, eggs and bacon?" Jane asked as he handed Lisbon and Annie their plates.

"Alright" Tommy shrugged.

"Jane, I can plate up Tommy's eggs, you need to go" Lisbon told him.

"Nonsense Lisbon, Cho won't mind"

"I'm your boss and I will" she pointed out.

"I'll get them" Tommy told his sister, not wanting to be the cause of a shouting match this early in the morning.

The weekend passed with surprisingly little conflict. It appeared that any possible anger which Tommy held towards Jane had long since vanished. When he had called before to arrange when they were coming and Lisbon had explained that she was living with Jane, Tommy had been less than complimentary about her consultant. She had to wonder exactly what Jane had said to him on the car ride back from the airport. She even briefly wondered if he'd hypnotised him, but quickly dispelled that thought. Even Jane wouldn't go that far…would he?

"Where are you off to this morning?" Jane asked Lisbon as he found her fully dressed and eating her breakfast on Sunday morning.

"The park" Lisbon said through a mouthful of orange "then lunch someplace"

"Ah lovely, beautiful weather" Jane nodded.

"Do you want to come?" Lisbon asked.

"A morning with my favourite Lisbons? How could I resist?"

"We're leaving in half an hour"

"You don't mind if I come do you?" Jane asked.

"Would I have invited you if I did?" she shot back "Sorry, I'm just a bit tired. I didn't sleep so well"

Jane opened his mouth but Tommy walked in before he could speak.

"Hey sis"

An hour and a half later they had managed to make their way to the park.

"Doesn't nature look beautiful today?" Jane commented.

"Lovely" Lisbon muttered dryly "why are you in such a good mood?"

"Why not? Spring has sprung Lisbon" Jane replied, stretching his arms out and closing his eyes.

"Sure" Lisbon nodded.

"Tommy? Don't you think the park looks wonderful this morning?"

"Yeah, it's…uh great" Tommy nodded.

"Still determined to be a cop, Annie?" Lisbon asked her niece as Jane and Tommy fell back slightly.

"Of course I am" Annie replied quickly "dad's spent long enough trying to persuade me not to anyway, it won't work"

"I'm not trying to persuade you not to" Lisbon pointed out "you're set on it, and Lisbons are known for being stubborn"

"I'm definitely stubborn" Annie said proudly.

"What about this boyfriend Jane mentioned on Friday?"

"It's nothing really" Annie shrugged "but seriously, don't tell dad; he'll go nuts"

"Why do you think I didn't tell him about the pregnant-Jane-mess for a while?"

"He was never going to be annoyed at you about that though"

"I still put it off" Lisbon maintained.

"That's different, he can't exactly ground his older sister" Annie huffed.

"And if he so much as tries to ground you then I'll have something to say about it"

"Thanks Auntie Reese" Annie said, looking over her shoulder at her father.

"Not that you couldn't handle him yourself" Lisbon added, smiling wryly.

They fell silent as they continued to walk to the other end of the park. Tommy and Jane seemed to be in deep discussion over something behind them; Lisbon dreaded to think what.

After lunch they returned to the apartment to pick up Tommy and Annie's things, and then Lisbon drove them both to the airport. She hugged them both goodbye and promised to keep them updated on everything.

"Jane?" Lisbon called as she got back to the apartment.

"In here"

She followed the voice through to the nursery where she found Jane wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt, paintbrush and paint pot in hand. One of the walls was now a glistening pale white.

"I got started on the painting, I hope you don't mind"

"I didn't realise you even knew what sweatpants were" she snorted.

"I did have to buy them specially" he admitted "I couldn't risk messing up my suit pants"

"I'll get changed and come help you in a minute"

"You don't have to"

"I want to" she maintained, her voice warning enough for him to stop protesting.

Lisbon went into her room and dug through her drawer to find her old sweatpants. They weren't maternity pants, but they were so baggy that it didn't matter. She found the old t-shirt that she kept for potentially messy tasks like this, and tugged it on. Even though it was a bit stretched, it didn't quite reach all the way over her stomach and she was aware that a slim strip of stomach was visible. She tried to pull it down, and tuck it into the sweatpants. It worked, until she stepped away from the mirror and it immediately came out. The only other casual maternity tops she had were pyjama tops, and she wasn't willing to give one of them up. Portion of stomach on display it would be then.

Jane raised his eyebrows slightly when she came back into the room, but Lisbon shot him a glare that challenged him to say something about it. It was half his fault that her stomach was so swollen anyway.

When Lisbon returned to work on Monday morning, she was surprised to find a neat stack of case closed paperwork on her desk. Some skim reading revealed the fact that the team had closed one of the two open cases that Friday, and Jane had failed to even mention it to her.

"Jane, what's this about closing the Fisher case?" Lisbon asked.

"What about it?" Jane replied. He was seated on the cream couch in her office, sipping at his cup of tea whilst he awaited the arrival of the rest of the team so he could go and bug them instead.

"Did you not think to…I don't know, mention it to me?" she raised her eyebrows at him.

"I didn't want to ruin your nice weekend by relaying my latest near death experience"

There was a knock on the office door before Lisbon could reply.

"Boss, did you want an update on what you missed?" Cho opened the door slightly and leant his head in.

"You closed the Fisher case; I've just found the paperwork"

"Did Jane not tell you?"

"Nope" Lisbon muttered "did anything else important happen?"

"Grace thinks she's got a lead in the other one, I'll get her to tell you when she gets here"

"Here she is now" Jane pointed out, as Van Pelt and Rigsby appeared outside the office door.

Cho shuffled inside to let them in, and shot Jane a look that must have been Cho's version of a glare.

"Hi Boss" Van Pelt greeted her "um Wayne and I have something to share with the team"

She paused, and they all looked at the pair expectantly whilst they exchanged nervous glances.

"We're engaged" Rigsby blurted out suddenly, and Van Pelt held up her left hand to show them the ring amidst congratulations and hugs.

"We're sorry we didn't tell you we were together again" Van Pelt explained whilst Lisbon closely inspected the ring "did you…did you guess at all?"

"Not in the slightest" Jane replied, smiling.

"Not at all" Lisbon agreed.

"I thought you knew, Jane" Van Pelt frowned "I mean, everyone knows it was you who went to all that effort to get the rules changed"

"I may have had an inkling…" Jane shrugged, and Lisbon couldn't help but snort.

"What?" Van Pelt asked quickly.

"We've all known for months" Lisbon admitted "don't feel bad, we are meant to be detectives"

"Oh"

"But I'm so happy for you" Lisbon continued "really, you deserve to be together"

"Same here" Cho nodded, actually _smiling_.

"Thanks" Rigsby smiled at his friend, and wrapped his arm around his fiancée who grinned at him in return.

"The regulations still say 'no inappropriate behaviour" Lisbon reminded them, putting on a stern voice "so none of that" she waved her hand towards them "at crime scenes, or in the office, or on stakeout"

"Of course not, sorry Boss" Rigsby unwrapped his arm.

 **I hope Lisbon's behaviour at the start wasn't out of character for anyone. I'm basing it on the way she reacted in Season 7 with the wedding stuff, plus the fact that she has pregnancy hormones which make her more prone to crying, and her constant confusion over her feelings for Jane…**


	12. Chapter 12

"Multiple gunshot wounds to the chest and abdomen, clear signs of a struggle…"

Lisbon nodded along to the local PD officer as she noted down what he said on her notepad, trying not to yawn. It was just past 7 on a Thursday morning, and the team had been forced from their beds to shuffle around a cramped apartment, looking at a mangled body.

"Who found the body?" Lisbon asked the police officer.

"The next door neighbour. She left early to catch a flight and noticed his door was open. Looked inside then called us" the officer shrugged.

"Where is she?"

"On her flight I assume. She told us what had happened on the phone on her way there, said she had an important meeting and she couldn't miss her flight"

"Convenient" Lisbon muttered "Ok, Rigsby, Cho, you stay here and talk to neighbours. Van Pelt, you come back with me. Bring the laptop; see if you can get anything from that. Jane-" she paused.

"Don't worry about me" Jane told her "I'm going to check something out"

Lisbon raised her eyebrows.

"I'll be back at the CBI in no time" he waved his hand "or a couple of hours anyhow"

"Whatever"

"Has anyone heard from Jane recently?" Lisbon asked, 5 hours later.

She was met with a chorus of 'no' and 'sorry boss's.

"Van Pelt, see if you can get a hit on his phone. I've tried calling him already"

"Sure boss" the redhead nodded, and tapped something into her computer "apparently he's in a house a few blocks away, not far from the crime scene actually" she frowned.

"Who's house?"

"Nancy Calder" Van Pelt read off the screen "that's weird; he called me earlier and asked me to get him an address for someone, it's the same place"

"Who's address?"

"A man, Thomas something I think? He didn't say what it was about"

"Right, can you text me that address? Cho and I will go and find out what mess he's managed to get himself into now"

Cho nodded and picked up his jacket, whilst Lisbon returned to her office to find her keys.

Upon arriving at the house, they spotted Jane's little blue car parked outside. Lisbon knocked on the door several times, with no response. Cho peered through the window.

"I can't see anyone in there"

"That's weird" Lisbon commented "call Van Pelt, get her to check his phone again"

"Same place" Cho told her a few minutes later "maybe he left it here by accident"

"Along with his car?" Lisbon pointed out.

There was a loud crash from nearby, and both agents spun around and pulled their guns out. Lisbon also felt a sharp kick in her stomach in response to the noise, and her hand automatically moved to comfort the baby.

Cho titled his head towards the garage and Lisbon nodded for him to approach. With another nod from Lisbon, he kicked down the garage door and burst in. Two gunshots sounded and Lisbon raced in after him. Cho was trying to put the flailing arms of a young man into handcuffs, who was shouting something unintelligible at him. She heard a muffled groan from the corner of the room and looked over to find a large chair on its side, a figure tied to it and wiggling its hands and feet to try and free itself. The brown shoes and three piece suit were enough for her to work out who the figure belonged to, even with the head covered with a black fabric bag. Lisbon pulled the bag off and carefully undid the gag that had been tied over his mouth.

"I leave you alone for a few hours, and look what you've done" she muttered, smiling slightly at him.

"I'd rather you waited until you untied me before you start with the smugness, Lisbon" Jane replied "I'm starting to get a little stiff here. Hey!" he said loudly as Lisbon hit his arm.

"Don't do that to me again" she glared at him "and that didn't hurt"

"I didn't mean to" he protested "and yes it very much did"

Lisbon rolled her eyes at him and dug around in her pocket. Jane's eyes widened as she extracted a small penknife, and then set about working through the ropes than constrained him.

"Hammer in your desk drawer, knife in your pocket…is there anywhere you don't hide a weapon Lisbon?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" she grinned.

"Boss" Cho called to her "what shall I do with him?"

"Put him in the car, I'll be out as soon as I've got Jane undone"

"You ok?" Cho asked his colleague.

"Just dandy" Jane replied, still half tied up and lying on the floor.

Lisbon finished cutting through the ropes and then stood up. Jane followed suit, whilst he dusted himself off and stretched.

"He better not have ruined my suit" Jane muttered.

"What's the connection anyway?"

"To the victim? Apparently his girlfriend cheated on him with the victim. He'd left some messages on the victim's phone"

"We didn't find them" Lisbon frowned.

"Um no. I pressed the wrong button and deleted them by accident" Jane explained sheepishly "anyway he's our killer – oh, and I think the girlfriend is trapped somewhere upstairs"

"What?"

"The girlfriend, I think she's upstairs"

Lisbon turned her back on him and quickly made her way into the house.

"Lisbon" Jane called after "be careful"

"You'd know all about that" she muttered under her breath.

"Hey" Jane stuck his head around the living room door, where Lisbon was reading a book about newborn babies "dinner's ready"

"Oh, thanks"

Lisbon marked the page in her book and then pushed herself off the couch. Jane watched her carefully, but had already learned his lesson about offering to help her get up a few days previously.

"I'm not doing very well at remembering all the stuff in that book" she admitted, sitting down in front of a steaming plate of curry and rice "but you've done it before, you must remember all the important stuff, right?"

"Most of it" Jane agreed "although Charlie was quite straightforward, we never had too many problems with her – well not whilst she was a baby anyway"

"Oh"

A thin frown line appeared between Lisbon's eyebrows.

"Stop worrying" Jane told her "it'll be fine, really"

"That's easy for you to say, you don't have to push another person out of your body in a few months" Lisbon muttered bitterly.

"That's a few hours, and then you have your own little person to take home and look after for ever" Jane pointed out softly.

"Yeah that's the scary bit" Lisbon replied, her eyes glued to her plate "then you're completely responsible for another life"

"You're a cop; that happens every day"

"That's different"

Jane reached across the table and took her hand.

"Lisbon – Teresa, I know you're worrying. Don't try and deny it" she glared at him, which he ignored "but please trust me. I know it's scary, but I've done this before and I'll be with you all the way. I'm not going to abandon you"

"It wouldn't be the first time"

"What?" he frowned.

"That you've abandoned me"

"Is this still about Vegas?"

"It's not just Vegas, Jane" she told him, tugging her hand out of his grasp "I mean I understand why you did that, but after Red John you just left and I never thought I'd see you again"

"But I said I'd-"

"I know you did" she cut in "but how was I meant to know? You didn't contact me, answer my calls – anything. I thought you'd gone. Even this morning when you didn't come back, I found myself wondering whether or not this was it and you'd just left again"

"This morning wasn't entirely my fault" he pointed out "I turned up to chat to him and he suddenly pulled a gun on me"

"But can you see where I'm coming from?" she pushed.

"I…yes, I can" he admitted finally "but you have to trust me Lisbon. Please. I'm not going to leave you alone again"

"Trust isn't instant Jane, it takes time"

"I trust you" he told her "with my life. No question"

"But not enough just to tell me where you were going this morning?"

"I told you, I wasn't planning on being taken hostage"

"I _know_ that, don't patronise me" she glared "but if you'd told me then maybe I could have sent someone with you, maybe you wouldn't have ended up in that situation"

"Maybe, or maybe he could have freaked out even more and killed us both"

"Jane-"

"Listen to me" Jane told her "whatever happened this morning aside, when was the last time I've purposely hidden things from you and gone off on my own?"

Lisbon thought about it for a moment. They'd had a similar discussion, not long ago, and she knew that the answer hadn't changed.

"Before Christmas"

"So before all of this" he waved his hand to indicate the two of them "happened?"

"I guess" she shrugged.

"So then why can't you see that I've changed?" he asked. He didn't look angry; it was more like he was interested to see how she didn't understand it "I'm serious about this; about your safety, about my safety. I'm not just going to leave you Lisbon. You have to know that"

"Well…ok" she murmured after a moment.

"Ok? Just like that?" Jane was taken aback.

"Well not 'just like that'" she shrugged "but I guess I can see where you're coming from. About this I mean, not in general" she added quickly, smiling ever so slightly.

"So can we go back to enjoying the delicious curry I made?"

"There's one thing I don't get" Lisbon frowned "you said you hadn't pulled one of your stunts before this happened" she touched her stomach "but I didn't tell you about that until February"

"Well" Jane said, pausing and racking his brain for words. He could just tell her the truth now. She'd inadvertently offered him the perfect opportunity, why not just take it and tell her how he had fallen completely and utterly in love with her?

"When I was away – after Red John…died" he continued, _coward_ "I thought a lot about things. And…about you, and I had, I guess it was an epiphany, about how you've always been there for me and how I…maybe haven't been so much, for you"

"That's not true"

"Isn't it? You said it yourself just a moment ago" he reminded her "Anyway, I decided that that needed to change, so…there we go"

"So you saw the error of your ways, just like in 'A Christmas Carol'?" Lisbon asked jokingly.

"Precisely" Jane grinned "now this really is going cold"

They returned to eating and chatting about shopping for nursery furnishings and Lisbon reminding Jane once again that their daughter wouldn't be called 'Goneril'.

Later that night, Lisbon lay in her bed thinking about what Jane had said. He wasn't going to leave her and run away. She had kind of known that all along, but now there was no way she could hide from it. She should have been relieved, but instead she was a little…scared. Now she had no reason to stop herself if he tried to kiss her again or anything like that. There was nothing stopping her from being with him, like deep down she so desperately wanted to.

She thought back to that case in Santa Cruz when he had kissed her in the middle of the night. He'd almost told her he loved her then, had she not stopped him and run away. They had never mentioned it again and Lisbon was seriously starting to think that it had just been a mistake.

She groaned into her pillow. Why couldn't anything just be simple where Jane was concerned? If it weren't for that little cloud of doubt in her mind about his feelings towards her, she would have kissed him the moment she had known for sure that he wasn't going to leave her. Well, that and the fact that her mouth must have tasted of curry.

Just over a week after Jane's morning of being taken hostage, they went shopping for nursery furnishings. It was now mid June, and the air was pleasantly warm but not yet too humid.

"Where do you want to go first?" Jane asked as they walked down the street where they'd chosen to start their shopping.

"I think we should get the bigger items first" Lisbon decided, digging around in her bag for something "so that's the crib, basket and changing table I think" she read off the paper.

"You made a list?" Jane asked, amused.

"Why not? I didn't want to forget something important"

"No reason" he replied, unable to stop smiling at the sweetness of it "let's try here first" he decided, putting his hand on her back to guide her into a nearby shop.

Choosing the crib and changing table didn't take them long, but neither of them would agree on a basket.

"What's wrong with this one?" Lisbon demanded "it's perfectly functional"

"It's just a bit plain" Jane told her "and this one is so much nicer, you said so yourself"

"And three times the price!" Lisbon exclaimed "for a little bit of swirly decoration"

"Which is irrelevant, since I'm paying"

"You paid in the last shop, it's my turn"

"I want to pay for this one"

"Well you're not, I'm getting this one" she decided, picking up her chosen basket and heading towards the checkout.

"Fine" Jane told her "I'm getting this one as well then; we'll just have two"

"Well that's just ridiculous Jane"

"Then don't buy that one"

"You're not going to change your mind on this, are you?" she glared at him through narrowed eyes.

"Nope"

"Fine" she huffed "buy your stupid basket"

She turned back and stomped past him, purposefully knocking his arm as she went.

"Lisbon" he called, following her and putting down the basket in the process.

"Lisbon" he repeated, as he finally caught up with her just outside the shop "why don't we just leave both of the baskets and go and look in another shop?"

"Why can't you just let me choose and buy something Jane?" she demanded.

"But you preferred my one; you were just worried that it was too expensive"

"Because it is!"

"But that doesn't matter if I buy it. I can more than afford it if that's what you're worried about"

"Liar, I know what a CBI consultant salary looks like" Lisbon muttered and looked pointedly away from him.

Jane frowned at her for a moment.

"I do have more than just my CBI pay, Lisbon"

"From where? Poker games?" she asked, her eyebrows raised.

"Um no, I have the savings I started when Charlie was born, plus the money from the sale of my house" he said quietly, not meeting her eyes.

"I didn't know you sold your house" she said after a pause.

"I sorted it out right after we got him. That's partially why I had to leave"

"But that money's…sort of special, do you really want to spend it on a basket?"

"It's not special Lisbon; it's just money" Jane explained "besides, what better way to spend it than on our child?"

"I guess" she said, looking unconvinced and still slightly shocked at the discovery that Jane had sold his house.

"So will you let me go back into that shop and buy the basket you actually want?" he asked.

"I…fine" she admitted finally "you win"

"Brilliant" he grinned.

"But only because you made me feel bad about your house" she reminded him "and because my basket was a bit dull"

Jane took Lisbon's hand and marched back into the shop, whilst she rolled her eyes and smiled at his regained enthusiasm as she was dragged after him.

"Can I help you?" the shop assistant asked as they re-entered.

"We've already chosen; thanks" Jane told her.

"Do you need anything else?" the assistant pushed "bedding and such?"

"We do need bedding actually" Lisbon reminded Jane "that crib only came with one set, we'll need another couple"

The assistant smiled and led them over to the stacks of bedding. Lisbon realised that Jane still held her hand in his own. She also realised that she didn't mind one bit – if anything, it was quite refreshing to play the 'normal' couple for once.

Three hours later, and Lisbon's car was stuffed with various pieces of furniture and bags of tiny clothes and blankets.

"I can't quite see how we'll be able to use all of this" Lisbon commented, looking with concern at the quantity they had managed to buy.

"Ah you'll see soon enough" Jane told her "but right now I'm in desperate need of some eggs. Come on, I know a nice place round the corner"

After they'd refuelled themselves after the tiring morning shopping, they spent the afternoon carrying all their purchases up to Jane's apartment and setting up the room. Once it was complete, they stood back and looked at their handiwork.

It was a lovely room. The walls were now a very pale shade of cream, and Jane had procured some stencils from somewhere and added a few silhouettes of trees and elephants on the walls. The crib and changing table were all set up with the new blankets folded and ready. All it lacked now was its inhabitant.

"Hi" Lisbon greeted Jane as she wondered into the kitchen after her shower, rubbing her sopping hair with a towel.

"The food will be a few minutes" he told her, stirring something in a large pan.

"I'm sure it was my turn to cook" Lisbon frowned.

"Ah who needs turns Lisbon? I like cooking"

"Yeah sure, just like Gable likes giving us a three weekends off-call in a row" Lisbon muttered.

"I wasn't sure whether or not you'd noticed"

"It was getting obvious" she shrugged.

"I do actually like cooking though" he maintained.

"So do I"

"No you don't, you find it time consuming and tedious"

"Well no" Lisbon argued "I like it sometimes, just not when I get home late after looking at photos of a gory crime scene all day"

"Meh" Jane shrugged "pass me some plates, will you"

Lisbon obliged, and then grabbed some cutlery and glasses and placed them on the table. If Jane wouldn't let her do her part of the cooking, then at least she could do something towards the meal.

Irritatingly, as well as enjoying cooking, Jane was actually very good at it. Tonight he had made some sort of vegetable stew with rice, which Lisbon wolfed down. Nursery shopping was very tiring. After their food, Jane went to take his shower and Lisbon settled down on the couch to watch the new crime drama which had come out. When Jane came back dressed in his pyjamas with his hair damp, he went to the kitchen and made two cups of chamomile tea.

"Lisbon" he said softly as he walked into the sitting room "I've got tea"

There was no response.

"Lisbon?"

Something shuffled on the couch, and Jane stepped further into the room.

Lisbon was curled up at the end of the couch, fast asleep. Jane watched her chest rise and fall gently for a few minutes, enjoying seeing her truly relaxed for once before he wandered out of the room. He came back a few minutes later with a blanket which he placed around her gently and tucked in. She shuffled a little more and Jane couldn't help but smile.

"Night Lisbon" Jane muttered, before leaning down and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

When Lisbon awoke the following morning she was surprised to find herself on the couch. She looked around her frowning, and was more surprised to see the blanket covering her.

"Morning sleepy"

"Jane?" Lisbon forced herself to sit up.

Jane smiled at her and sat on the edge of the arm rest, handing her a steaming mug of coffee.

"Thanks" she muttered, taking a sip "wait it's Monday. What's the time? We have to-"

"You've got the morning off; doctor's appointment" Jane reminded her before she could get up.

"How do you know that?" Lisbon asked, frowning at him and sinking back down.

"What can you say? I just know" Jane shrugged and Lisbon glared at him "or I read your lips when you called last week to change it"

Lisbon picked up a pillow from the couch and threw it at him.

"Stop with the lip-reading Jane, leave people with some privacy. What is the time anyway?"

"Half eight" Jane read off his list.

"Even if I don't need to be at work, you do" she pointed out, yawning.

"Meh, there's not much on today. I can feel it"

"Yet you keep telling us you're not psychic" she muttered.

"I thought I would come with you instead"

"To my doctor's appointment" Lisbon asked slowly.

"Why not? Sounds like fun"

"No, it doesn't" Lisbon stared at him with narrowed eyes, trying to work out whether or not he was serious "Jane…"

"Ok I may have already texted Cho and told him I'll be in late" Jane admitted.

"Jane!"

A second cushion flew across the room, hitting him on the shoulder.

"You should ask about anger management whilst we're there" he joked "or not" he added quickly.

"Can you just ask me before inviting yourself to my private appointments please?"

"Well I would but we both know you wouldn't let me"

"Because they're private!" Lisbon reminded him.

"Fine, how about I invited myself because I wanted to keep up to date with what's happening and be part of it?"

Lisbon glared at him for a few moments, and then looked away.

"Fine come" she said, sipping her coffee "I'm going to change"

"So you're…27 weeks along now, Miss Lisbon?" the doctor asked as they sat down in her office.

"Yes" Lisbon nodded.

"And how are you feeling? Any discomfort?"

"Nope"

"Has she been kicking?"

"Most days"

"You know you could adopt?" Jane cut in "it's clear you want a child but can't have one, why not adopt?"

"I'm sorry, Mr Jane?" the doctor asked, frowning at him.

"Jane" Lisbon hissed, elbowing him discretely.

"What? I'm trying to help" he whispered back.

"Thanks for your um…advice" the doctor nodded "so I just need to take your blood pressure…" she continued.

Jane opened his mouth to say something else, but quickly changed his mind as he caught sight of Lisbon's warning glare.

"If you could just push your sleeve up" the doctor asked Lisbon.

Lisbon complied, and the doctor secured the cuff around her arm. They sat in silence as the doctor inflated the cuff and then waited for the result.

"Hold on…" she frowned, pressing a button on the machine and waiting a bit more.

"Is it ok?" Lisbon asked nervously, as the doctor looked over her file.

"It's a bit higher than normal" the doctor said, still reading over the papers "I'm just re-doing it to check"

Lisbon glanced at Jane who smiled and patted her leg comfortingly.

"That's still a little higher than I'm happy with" the doctor said a few seconds later, after reading the machine again.

"There's no need to worry" she reassured them, noting the two concerned faces in front of her "you're a police officer right?"

"Yes" Lisbon nodded.

"Right…is it possible for you to avoid any strenuous work? Not too much activity?"

"I guess but-"

"Yep" Jane broke in "desk duty"

"I think that's a bit unnecessary" Lisbon shot back.

"If we can't control your blood pressure then it could put you or the baby at risk" the doctor explained "and you'll have to go on bed rest"

Lisbon's eyes widened at the mention of bed rest, and she shook her head involuntarily.

"I…desk duty it is" Lisbon said decidedly.

"Brilliant, so I want to see you again in a couple of weeks just to check your blood pressure again" the doctor told her "and now, if you don't mind I just need to have a feel"

"Sure" Lisbon nodded.

The doctor raised her eyebrows and held out a hand slightly.

"Oh" Lisbon's eyes widened, shuffling forward on the seat to let the doctor access her stomach.

"I cannot go on desk duty" Lisbon said the moment they were in the car "it's bad enough being on 'restricted duty'"

"Lisbon, your blood pressure is too high" Jane told her "you can't just ignore the doctor"

"Because I have to put up with you all the time" she reminded him "my blood pressure used to be so low. Since when did you like doctors anyway?"

"Since they tried to protect the people I…care about"

"I'll go more crazy on desk duty than if I just walk around a bit, visit a few crime scenes" Lisbon reasoned "I can't just…sit all the time, I'm meant to be a unit leader"

"You can be a unit leader" Jane pointed out "from your desk"

They argued about it all the way back to the office, where Lisbon immediately went to make a much needed coffee (albeit decaf). Ten minutes later, an angry Lisbon stomped into the bullpen to Jane's couch.

"Jane, why did you go and tell Gable I was on desk duty?" she demanded.

"Because I knew you wouldn't"

"Jane!"

"What? You wouldn't have told him and you wouldn't have followed it"

"Yes I would!"

The bullpen around them was slowly quietening as more and more people started to listen.

"Um boss" Rigsby tried to cut in.

"I can look after myself" Lisbon continued, ignoring Rigsby.

"Boss" he tried again.

"What?" she snapped.

"We uh…we have a case"

"Right, I'll get my…"

She caught Jane's eye and looked away.

"Cho" she called "you're in charge at the scene, call me when you're there"

Ignoring Jane's protests she marched back to her office and shut the door, leaving a very quiet team staring after her.


	13. Chapter 13

**Thanks for all of you who are reading and reviewing! It means so much to me! And thanks to Rosepeony for bringing to my attention the fact that my scene separators haven't been showing up – sorry for any confusion this caused, I'll go back and fix it in previous chapters but they should be there from now on.**

 **I promise the Jane/Lisbon big get together will be coming up very shortly!**

Lisbon had been stuck on desk duty for 4 weeks now, and she was completely fed up. She wasn't entirely sure how she was meant to survive another 8 or 9 weeks of it, but although her doctor was confident that her blood pressure wasn't putting her in any danger, she refused to allow her return to 'restricted duty'. She felt like a rookie all over again, having to wait in the office whilst her team went off to crime scenes and collect suspects.

"Boss?" Van Pelt's head appeared at the door "do you have a minute?"

"Sure, what's up?" Lisbon replied quickly. Any reason to alleviate her boredom for a few minutes was welcome in her office.

"I know I've asked before" Van Pelt began, coming to stand in front of the desk "but I wanted to know if you'll be a bridesmaid at my wedding?"

"Oh I…I mean I'd love to, but-"

"Don't worry, it won't be for months" Van Pelt reassured her quickly, understanding the reason for her reluctance.

"Oh" Lisbon smiled "then I would be honoured"

"Thanks" Van Pelt grinned "although I'm making it very clear to Sophia this time that I do not want bright pink bridesmaids dresses, so there's no need to worry about that"

"You didn't like them either?" Lisbon looked surprised.

"I mean I didn't mind them" Van Pelt shrugged "but you know, I'd have much rather had something in blue"

"Blue would be nice" Lisbon agreed.

"We could even get a miniature version for your baby" Van Pelt suggested "and she could be a mini bridesmaid"

"Sure" Lisbon nodded, smiling a little nervously.

"Have you decided on a name yet?" she asked suddenly.

"Not yet" Lisbon replied, quickly realising that they would really need to come up with a name in the near future "Jane just keeps suggesting different names that appeared in Shakespeare plays"

"Oh" Van Pelt looked disappointed.

Van Pelt chattered about dress colours and designs and everything else wedding related for a few minutes whilst Lisbon nodded along, and then left her in peace. Lisbon decided that she might as well use the time to come up with her own list of baby names, since they really did need to choose one in the near future. She started by writing down the handful of girls' names that popped into her mind.

 _Emily_

 _Olivia_

 _Abigail_

 _Emma_

 _Madison_

 _Hannah_

 _Chloe_

 _Amelia_

 _Anna_

 _Lily_

 _Megan_

 _Katelyn_

 _Madeline_

After a few minutes she crossed out some names that made her wrinkle her nose up slightly, and then looked at the list again.

 _Abigail_

 _Chloe_

 _Anna_

 _Lily_

 _Madeline_

That was easy, Lisbon decided, now she only had 5 names to choose from. But what if Jane didn't like any of her name choices? What if he genuinely did want something Shakespearian? She hadn't spent too long considering all the possible names there were either; maybe she should buy one of those long books and go through that instead.

Before she had any more time to contemplate it, Jane himself knocked on her door and let himself in.

"Hi" he said, strolling over to the couch and sitting down.

Lisbon quickly pushed the paper with the names on under a file. Jane noticed and frowned for a second, but decided better than to irritate a bored and pregnant Lisbon.

"I hear Van Pelt has coerced you into being a bridesmaid again" he commented.

"Yup, she promised no pink dresses this time though"

"That's a shame; the whole 'angry princess' look quite suited you" Jane replied, looking genuinely a little disappointed.

"Sure" Lisbon looked unconvinced "what are you doing here then? Have you tired of irritating the rest of the team?"

"Something like that" he shrugged "I actually came to offer you a hand with the paperwork"

Lisbon stared at him for a few seconds, trying to determine whether or not he was serious.

"Liar" she determined eventually.

"I nearly got you though, didn't I?" he grinned.

"In no way did you 'nearly get me' Jane; it's obvious when you're lying to me now"

"Please" Jane rolled his eyes "I am a master of lying"

"Oh really? I can see straight through you Patrick Jane, try me"

"I can't just try you with a lie now Lisbon, it doesn't work like that"

"Oh, you scared?" Lisbon raised her eyebrows at him.

"Scared? For your pride maybe" he shot back.

Their eyes were locked in battle for a few moments. Jane was smirking slightly at her, whilst Lisbon's eyebrows remained raised in their 'unimpressed position'. They broke contact as Lisbon's phone rang.

"Lisbon" she answered, shooting Jane a glare that told him that this was not over.

"Ok, sure"

"Right"

"But boss, I-"

"Sir please, it won't make any difference"

"I…ok, fine"

She hung up and shoved her phone back in her pocket, clearly irritated.

"Let me guess" Jane began "we have a case at the other end of the state and Gable won't let you go because you're meant to be on desk duty?"

"Did you overhear my conversation?" Lisbon asked, narrowing her eyes at him "Santa Maria, two victims"

"You're just an open book to me Lisbon" Jane shrugged "and your phone volume is up"

"Whatever"

Half an hour later the rest of the team had set off on their 5 hour drive down to the crime scene in Santa Maria, leaving Lisbon to sulk in her office. She got in contact with Santa Maria PD to get the victims' identities so she could put together background checks, but once she finished them she found that she had nothing left to do. She'd gone through the case files which she needed for court the following afternoon four times now, and double checked that she had no paperwork left to work on.

It was nearing evening when Cho finally called from the crime scene to update her. They had sent through crime scene photos and she'd sent them her background checks, but there was really little that she could do to help from such a distance when they had little to go on so far. Feeling a bit useless, Lisbon went home.

She was looking forward to her first evening to herself after moving in with Jane, but she returned to their apartment and suddenly found that it felt very empty without him. She had nobody to chat to over her takeaway, and watching her new favourite crime drama wasn't quite the same without Jane's remarks. It was surprising how accustomed she had become to having him around all the time.

After her show had finished she decided that she might as well call Jane and get an update on the case. Well, that was why she told herself she was calling him anyway.

"Lisbon, good evening to you" he answered cheerily "how are you surviving without me?"

"Perfectly well" she replied "I remember how much I missed being able to watch a TV show without having all of its flaws pointed out to me"

"What's the fun in that?"

"I wanted to know if you'd come up with any insights on the case, Cho sent me photos of the crime scene"

"Didn't you speak to Cho already?" Jane asked, clearly already knowing the answer.

"I thought you might have come up with something new"

"Aw Lisbon, you miss me"

"I definitely do not" Lisbon replied quickly "I just want to help with the case, since I'm not allowed to actually _be there_ "

"There's nothing embarrassing about just wanting to talk to me" Jane continued "I'm flattered"

"Oh go to hell" she muttered.

"Fine, I'll humour you" Jane told her "It's most likely something to do with the husband's family business. The brother looks like a possibility, but I won't know until I see him. Wife was most likely killed because she was in the way; the husband was the intended victim. Happy now?"

"Happ _ier_ "

"Good, night then"

"What? That's it?"

"There's nothing more to say about the case so far. Unless…you'll admit that you rang because you missed me"

Lisbon could practically hear the smirk in his voice.

"Alright, night Jane"

"Oh that's not fun Lisbon. Come on; just admit that you wanted to talk to me"

"Nope, I want to go to sleep now actually"

"What takeout did you have?"

"I didn't have takeout"

"I'm thinking…Mexican? And now you're sitting on the couch in your sweatpants wondering exactly how you used to spend your evenings before you had me to entertain you"

Lisbon remained silent. Damn that man and his ability to know everything!

"It's late and I have court tomorrow afternoon, night Jane"

"Oh come on Lisbon, would it help if I said that I missed you too?"

"Night Jane" she said firmly "good luck with your case"

"Night Lisbon" he grumbled, sensing his battle lost "sleep well"

The team spent another two nights in Santa Maria whilst Jane came up with a frankly ridiculous plan to catch their killer. Lisbon was almost relieved that Cho was the one having to put up with his antics for once. Since they spent the afternoon sorting everything out and apologising to everyone Jane managed to offend in the process (most of whom were more amused at his methods than anything else), Lisbon wasn't expecting him back until late evening. When she returned from a short walk around the block and heard a noise in the kitchen, she immediately went into cop mode and entered gun drawn.

"CBI, hands in the air"

"Nice to see you too" Jane muttered back, holding his hands up from the onion he'd been chopping.

"Jane?" Lisbon frowned at him, tucking the gun back into its holster "what are you doing here?"

"Well, I do _live_ here"

"You know what I mean" she said, rolling her eyes at him.

"We closed the case, I came home" he shrugged, returning to his onions "the others don't need me to sort out all those boring bits"

"Those 'boring bits' were cleaning up the mess you made" she pointed out "I talked to Cho"

"He agreed to my plan" Jane replied nonchalantly "well he didn't disagree with it, anyway. Where have you been anyway?"

"Nowhere"

Jane turned round again and stared at her for a few seconds, looking for a clue.

"You've been for a walk" he said decidedly "did you not listen to the doctor, Lisbon?"

"I've been going crazy the past three days" Lisbon reasoned "I didn't go too far, I just needed to get out for a bit. Fresh air is good for you"

"Not when you're pregnant and have been ordered to rest"

"Don't patronise me Jane, I can look after myself"

Jane opened his mouth to say something back, and then decided better of it.

"The food will be about an hour. Please Lisbon, just go and sit down"

"Fine" she said, glaring at him through narrowed eyes but following his request.

At some point in the middle of the night, Lisbon got up to use the bathroom. As she stepped into the hallway she quickly became aware that there was classical music playing somewhere in their apartment. She looked up and down the dark hallway, frowning, before realising that it was emanating from Jane's room. She stood still and listened to the gentle melody as it tinkled effortlessly around the piano.

A gentle kick from her stomach reminded her why she got up in the first place, and she hurried to the bathroom. On her way back she noticed that Jane's door was slightly ajar; she was sure that it had been closed a few minutes ago. Glancing around her quickly, Lisbon approached the door cautiously. Just as she reached her hand out to push it, a voice sounded behind her.

"It helps me sleep"

Lisbon spun around and spotted Jane leant against the wall, sporting his striped pyjamas with a cup of tea in his hand.

"Sorry?"

"The music, it helps me sleep" he explained.

Even in the semi darkness Lisbon could see his face quite clearly, and it suddenly struck her how much more tired he looked than when he went away a few days previously.

"I thought you were sleeping better now" she commented.

"Most days" he shrugged, sipping his tea "but not always"

"Oh"

"Just because he's gone it doesn't mean the pain goes away" Jane said softly.

Lisbon knew just how true that was. Even though the threat of Red John was no longer hanging over all of them, she knew his presence in her life had changed her. That was the reason she still carried a gun at all times - even in her own apartment - and was wary to trust anyone outside of her team. She even had the occasional nightmare with looming red faces and slashed bodies. Just because Jane appeared to be at peace with it all, didn't mean that he actually _was_.

Lisbon felt a sharp tightening sensation in her lower belly and winced slightly.

"Lisbon? Are you ok?" Jane asked, clearly reading the pain from her expression.

"I'm fine" she told him "it's nothing"

"Are you sure? We should go to the hospital if you think there's any chance something might be wrong"

"The doctor told me it's perfectly normal" she explained "Go back to bed Jane; get some sleep"

"Not like I wasn't trying that already" he muttered under his breath "If you promise me that you'll come and wake me up if anything feels weird"

"I promise" she said slowly, fighting the urge to roll her eyes at his worrying "night Jane"

"Sleep well" he told her as she passed him "both of you"

The following two weeks the team were met with a barrage of new cases. People just kept getting murdered, and it wasn't made any easier with the fact that their unit leader was barely allowed to leave her office. They managed to close three of the five open cases by the end of the second week, which is the only reason Van Pelt had managed to get Lisbon to agree to join her wedding dress shopping.

Lisbon was seated on a chair outside the dressing rooms in the third bridal shop, praying that Van Pelt had finally found a dress she liked. Her childhood best friend and maid of honour, Sophia, was meant to be the one going wedding dress shopping with her. Unfortunately for Lisbon, she had been forced to fly to the other side of the country the previous afternoon for a family emergency. If it wasn't for the fact that there was nothing more they could do on the cases yet and Jane's encouragement, she probably wouldn't have agreed to accompany her.

"What about this one?" Van Pelt asked, the uncertainty evident in her voice.

It was a beautiful white dress, with lace sleeves and a flowing skirt.

"It's gorgeous" Lisbon nodded, her eyebrows raised slightly in appreciation "you look amazing"

"Thanks" Van Pelt shrugged "I'm just not sure about the back; I mean it's quite low…"

She turned round to reveal the back of the dress, which was open all the way down to her lower back.

"But if you had your hair down then nobody would see that?"

"I guess"

Van Pelt was twisting around to try and look at the back in the mirror.

"I'll think about it" she decided finally "I mean this is my favourite so far, but I've got one more to try on"

She disappeared back into the dressing room to change and Lisbon dug her phone out of her bag.

 _I'm not going to make it back for lunch, Grace is trying on every wedding dress in California. L_

She sent the text to Jane and then put her phone away. She knew that he would wait for her to get back before eating otherwise and she would be lucky to get back before dinner at this rate. She didn't really mind being asked dress shopping with Van Pelt - actually, she had been quite flattered to have been asked - but she never knew that it could take so long to choose one dress.

A loud _ping_ alerted her to Jane's reply.

 _I made chilli, do you want me to save you some? J_

Lisbon was halfway through typing her reply when another text came in.

 _One day maybe you'll be able to subject her to the pain of wedding dress shopping as well. J_

Lisbon snorted out loud. Yeah right, her get married? If her fear of commitment and lack of social life weren't enough to ward off any potential partners, her soon-to-be-born child would definitely suffice. Unless… _no, don't go there Teresa_ she chastised herself. Even if Jane had made it clear that he did have feelings for her, she had no idea if he would ever try and act on them again, not after the way she had reacted the last time.

The dressing room curtain was pulled back yet again, to reveal a grinning Van Pelt in the latest dress.

"This is the one" she announced, coming to stand in front of the mirror.

"It's stunning" Lisbon nodded "really, Rigs is going to faint when he sees you"

Van Pelt fingered the dress and sighed happily.

"It's a little pricey, but…I just love it so much" she gushed.

"You're only going to have one wedding" Lisbon pointed out "well…hopefully"

"I know" Van Pelt nodded, her eyes still glued to the dress's reflection "I'll go change and then we can go"

"Ok" Lisbon nodded, trying not to look too relieved.

"Just the bridesmaids' dresses to get now"

Lisbon stared at her.

"I'm joking" Van Pelt added after a minute, smiling at the expression on Lisbon's face "don't worry, Sophia is most definitely coming with me for that"

"I wasn't…" Lisbon protested weakly, but then gave up and got her phone out again. She would be back in time for lunch it appeared.

Gable didn't call Lisbon when their next case came in, at 10am on a Monday night. Apparently he wasn't aware that his SCU Special Agent was living with her consultant however, who had been in the shower when he called with his phone left in the living room with Lisbon.

"Boss? This is Lisbon"

"Lisbon? Sorry, I must have called the wrong number" Gable frowned as he took the phone away from his ear to check the display. It was definitely Jane's number.

"This is Jane's phone; he's in the shower" Lisbon explained.

"Do you want me to pass a message on?" she added after Gable didn't reply for a few minutes.

"Uh…yes. You have a case, I wasn't going to call you because…"

"Because I'm not allowed to the crime scene anyway so there's no point me knowing until tomorrow anyway" Lisbon finished for him "It's fine, boss"

"Right. Anyway I'll text Jane the address; he needs to get there ASAP"

"What's the case?"

"A body – well, a skeleton really – found in an abandoned barn. The local PD officer was convinced it's the body of a woman who went missing years ago. Now pretend you know nothing about the case until tomorrow morning – that's an order, agent. I'm not having you go against the doctor's orders"

"I'll pass it on to Jane" she told him.

"Thanks"

There was silence for a few seconds, as Gable wondered whether or not it was inappropriate to ask Lisbon what on earth was going on between her and Jane (when she'd announced she was pregnant to him she had been adamant that they were not a couple).

"Well uh…night Lisbon" Gable said finally.

"Night boss"

He hung up and Lisbon put the phone back on the living room table. Her blood pressure had been even nearer to normal at her latest appointment, would it really hurt just to go along to one crime scene? It wasn't like she was canvassing or going to talk to a suspect with the potential to make a run for it.

"Were you talking to someone?"

Jane appeared at the living room door in his pyjamas, running a hand through his damp hair.

"Gable called" Lisbon explained "we have a case; I'll drive"

Jane surveyed her suspiciously for a few seconds.

"Oh come on Jane, I drive to and from work every day. Standing around a crime scene is no more onerous than the walk up to my office"

"Alright" he decided finally "I better go change again"

Lisbon stared after him as he left, surprised at how easily he'd accepted it. Maybe he had finally realised that trying to run investigations from her office was doing her more harm than good.

The rest of the team were a little surprised to see her arrive at the crime scene. Well, Rigsby and Van Pelt looked surprised; Cho just looked like Cho.

"What have we got?" she asked her second in command whom she assumed had already spoken to the first respondent.

"Some kids found the body. Looks to be female, twenties or thirties, but they won't know until they get it back to the lab"

"Do they know roughly how long she's been dead?"

"At least 5 years, probably a lot longer"

"Ok, Van Pelt – you go back to the office and look through missing persons from 5 or more years. Rigsby, Cho, talk to the kids that found the body. I'll go back to the office with Van Pelt"

"Um, boss" Van Pelt said nervously "shouldn't you-"

"I'll be fine" Lisbon reassured her "Jane?"

"I'll go with you. I feel like a nice nap on my couch"

After half an hour of searching through all the missing persons' descriptions which fitted the limited information they had on their victim, Lisbon decided that they couldn't do much more to get an ID until they finished with the body at the lab, which might not be for a few days. Even thought it was now past midnight and she was struggling to stay awake, she didn't think she could leave the others to do the work under the excuse of being pregnant.

"Boss? I think I have something"

Van Pelt passed her a printout of a newspaper article, about a body found in a barn near to Sacramento 7 years ago. Like their case, the victim was a young woman, but the killer had never been found.

"I know it's probably a coincidence, but there's a possibility that the murders are linked" Van Pelt shrugged "do you want me to look into any similar occurrences?"

"Good work" Lisbon suppressed a yawn "that's all we can do until we get the coroner's report"

"Um boss?" Van Pelt added tentatively "we think…well we don't mind…if you wanted to go home. We can handle the case for now"

"I'm fine" Lisbon replied automatically.

"Sure, of course" Van Pelt nodded, clearly regretting her statement "I'll get back to work"

Lisbon was convinced that being pregnant made people treat her like she was particularly delicate. She could, contrary to her team's beliefs, stay up beyond midnight or walk for more than 10 metres. Maybe her blood pressure was a little high, but it wasn't like she was at huge risk if she exerted herself at all. And even if she was barely allowed to leave her desk, she was determined to help her team with the case.

Lisbon stretched her arms out and yawned. Her daughter seemed to be kicking more and more frequently these days, and she already knew that she would miss the friendly little movements once she was born. That wouldn't be for weeks though, she quickly reminded herself. She leant back in her chair and enjoyed the gentle pressure moving around in her stomach. She even dared to close her eyes for a few seconds, just a moment of relaxation before she returned to work.

"Lisbon" someone said, nudging her gentle on the shoulder "Lisbon, wake up"

Her eyes fluttered open and Jane came into focus.

"You need to go home" he told her.

"I'm fine" she maintained "I just closed my eyes for a little bit"

"Lisbon, it's nearly 2am. You've been asleep for an hour"

Lisbon looked at the clock to confirm. How had time passed so quickly? It had only been a few moments since she closed her eyes.

"The rest of the team are going home, and as are you" Jane continued "I'm driving"

"What? No" she said quickly, sitting up a bit "I'll go home now but in no universe are you driving"

"Sure, you drive" he shrugged "but look what I have" he put his hand in his pocket and took out Lisbon's car keys.

"Did you pick my pocket whilst I was sleeping?" Lisbon demanded, glaring at him.

"They were basically falling out" he shrugged "come on, I want to go to bed"

 **A/N**

 **If there are any fellow insomniacs out there then I do actually find listening to gentle music at night can help me get to sleep**


	14. Chapter 14

It took the team two weeks to come up with an ID on the victim. It was only when Van Pelt had started looking at missing persons cases nationwide - as opposed to just those in California and the surrounding states - that they came across a girl who had gone missing from New Jersey 7 years ago, whose dental records and dimensions matched their victim. But an ID and a few cases which were possibly linked weren't anywhere near enough to go on. A week later however, a dog walker came across a semi-decomposed body in a ditch in the middle of nowhere, with trauma to her skull almost exactly matching that of their first victim. A body that had likely only been there a few weeks was much more likely to have evidence or something to go on that one which had been there for years. Although the crime scene was no longer intact for them to look at, it was potentially a big step forward in the case.

"Hi" Jane called out as he let himself into the apartment "I'm back"

They'd had a long day looking into their latest discovery, and hadn't got away from the CBI until 9pm.

"What took you so long?" Lisbon replied from the living room "you left just before me"

"Grocery shopping"

Jane appeared at the living room door and held up two full grocery bags. Lisbon looked up briefly, and then returned to perusing the case file in front of her.

"Did you make a start on dinner?"

"No" Lisbon sighed "I was just about to; I've been looking at the notes for the two missing persons cases, trying to see if anything matches"

"Did you find anything?"

"Not yet"

"I thought we could have that curry I made last week and froze for dinner, anyway" he said, turning back to their original conversation.

"Oh, alright" she shrugged.

"Are you ok?" Jane asked, frowning at her.

"Why would I not be?"

"You seem…off"

"I'm tired" she pointed out "it's been a long day"

Jane disappeared off to the kitchen and set about putting the groceries away and getting the food out for dinner. Once the rice was simmering in a pan and the curry was slowly defrosting in the microwave, he wandered back into the living room to take a look at the case file Lisbon had open.

"Are you sure you're ok?" he asked after a few minutes.

There was a worried crease between Lisbon's eyebrows and she seemed a little on edge.

"I'm fine" she told him "You…worry too much"

"Lisbon what's wrong?"

"It's just the baby moving around, it's hurting my back for some reason" she shrugged "nothing, really"

He narrowed his eyes and stared at her for a few seconds, and then returned to reading the file she had given him to look at. When she suddenly tensed up a few minutes later he put the file on the table and turned to her.

"Teresa, what's happening? Are you in pain?"

Her 'no' was just a little too hurried to convince Jane.

"Then what's going on?"

"It's just those Braxton Hicks" she explained quickly "they're a little stronger than usual"

"And more frequent, and last longer?"

"Yes but…I'm not in labour. It's too early" she explained quickly, knowing exactly what he was getting at.

"Has your water broken?" he pushed, and Lisbon cringed slightly at his candidness.

"No"

"You mean there's a possibility it might have but you'd much rather believe it hadn't"

"Is now really the time for mind reading?" she glared at him "fine. I did _wonder_ when I went to the restroom…"

"When?"

"Tuesday"

"Tuesday? Lisbon, we need to get you to the hospital right now"

"No" she said, shaking her head firmly "it's Braxton Hicks, as I said. I'm definitely not in labour"

"Oh, and you'd know that from all those children you've had before would you?"

"I just _know_ Jane" she replied, fixing him with an icy glare.

He would have found her argument a little more convincing if she hadn't tensed and shut her eyes for a moment just after she spoke.

"Ok. You wait here whilst I turn off the hob and then we'll go" he said, standing up.

"Go where?"

"The hospital Lisbon! Where people go when they're just about to give birth!"

"But I-"

Jane sat back down on the edge of the couch beside her and picked up her left hand.

"Lisbon, look at me" he said softly, stroking the back of her hand.

Lisbon looked pointedly at the cushion beside her.

"Lisbon?"

"You're not hypnotising me Jane" she replied, eyes fixed on the cushion.

"Hypnotise you?" he frowned "I wasn't going to hypnotise you"

She looked up and glared at him until she decided that he was actually telling the truth.

"I know you're scared" he began, still stroking her hand "I would be lying if I said I wasn't, and maybe this is a false alarm, but we need to go to the hospital and make sure"

"But what if-"

"What if it is the real thing?" he finished her sentence "then I'd much rather you were in the place with all the doctors and drugs than sitting in our living room telling yourself that it's not happening"

"Fine" she determined eventually "but I'm driving"

"What? Are you joking?"

"Got you that time, didn't I?" she grinned at him suddenly, and then remembered the situation "don't forget to turn off the gas, and put that curry back in the fridge – it's got chicken in"

Jane smiled to himself as he walked away. Even when she was just about to go into hospital and give birth, Lisbon couldn't help but worry about the little things like the curry going in the fridge.

When they arrived at the hospital the doctors confirmed that Lisbon was actually in labour. She was already having contractions nearly every 3 minutes by this point, and very quickly decided that childbirth looked like it would be a lot more painful than that time she got shot in the shoulder. Jane pointed out that she had enough adrenaline then with the realisation that O'Laughlin was the mole for the pain to really set in, so it wasn't that different. Lisbon fixed him with an angry glare until he took it back and returned to letting her squeeze his hand every time the pain overcame her. When he wasn't having his hand broken by Lisbon's iron grip, he managed to text the rest of the team and update them on the situation.

"Grace says good luck" he told Lisbon, as a text came in a few hours later "she wants to come in and wait with you"

"Come in?" Lisbon's eyed widened.

"Did I not tell you? The whole team are in the waiting room, do you want me to go and-"

"God no Jane!" she shrieked "The last thing I need right now is for my team to come and see their boss in a sweaty, angry state. And the doctor will be back in a minute to take me through to the delivery room"

"I don't think they'll take you through to delivery quite yet" he pointed out, whilst typing out his reply.

"Yes they will" she maintained "Jane!"

"What?" he turned back to her quickly "what it is?"

"We never decided on a name"

"Oh" Jane sank back into his chair "don't worry about that, I almost think it's better that we wait until we meet her and can see which name will suit…Jesus woman! Do you have any idea how much that hurts?!"

Lisbon waited until the pain had passed and then glared at him so fiercely that he was almost worried she would bore a hole through him.

"I think she has a pretty good idea of what pain is right now, Mr Lisbon" the doctor told him from the door.

Jane opened his mouth to explain that they weren't married, but the doctor cut him off before he could even begin.

"How are we doing, Teresa?"

"Oh, alright" Lisbon replied nonchalantly, smiling a little at the doctor's address of Jane.

"Hopefully it won't be too much longer" the doctor smiled sympathetically at her "now if you don't mind, I just need to check…"

Jane became very interested in the pattern on the wallpaper as the doctor checked to see how far along she was.

"Right" she muttered, scribbling something on the paper "you're just past 8cm, and given that she's a bit earlier than anticipated I think we'll be getting you into delivery fairly soon. Just hang in there for now, you're nearly there"

The doctor left them alone again and Lisbon returned to lying on her side – the most comfortable position for her.

"Mr Lisbon, really" Jane shook his head and sighed.

"Oh come on Jane" Lisbon rolled her eyes at him "get over it"

She closed her eyes and grimaced and Jane grabbed both of her hands in his, knowing what was coming.

"It's ok Lisbon" he murmured "not much longer now"

"That's easy for you to say" she spat out, eyes still squeezed shut "all you had to do was…god, how can this hurt this much?"

He hated seeing her in pain like this. Although it wasn't the first time he'd been through it, he had forgotten quite how difficult it could be to see someone you loved panting and swearing in increasing levels of agony. Yet still, Lisbon was too proud to accept the epidural or any of the other drugs they offered her to relieve the pain a little. He had to hold back a smile every time one of the nurses suggested it and she looked affronted.

Lisbon breathed through the last of the pain and then let her body relax.

"When will it be over?" she demanded "I swear I've been here for days"

"Four hours" Jane corrected her "which is basically days" he added quickly.

"This is all your fault you know" she glared at him "if you hadn't ordered that first glass of wine…"

"And you hadn't invited me back to your apartment and gotten me more drunk and seduced me" he finished off under his breath "I take full responsibility"

"Good" she nodded firmly.

When the doctor returned half an hour later Lisbon was right in the middle of a fairly explicit explanation of how much she hated Jane right that moment, which to his credit, he took with no objections.

"That's exactly what I am" Jane nodded along, stroking her hair with his spare hand "completely"

As soon as Lisbon was able to hold a coherent conversation with the doctor, she was able to check her and tell her that she was nearly at 10cm, meaning they would be taking her through to delivery imminently.

"Thank god" Lisbon groaned "After this I doubt I'll even notice next time I get shot"

The doctor raised her eyebrows at the comment and paused going about her other checks for a second.

"She's a cop" Jane pointed out quickly.

Once she was wheeled through to the delivery room things progressed a lot more quickly. Lisbon finally gave in and accepted the gas and air she was offered, and Jane started to wonder if he should ask for an x-ray on his hand after what it had been through the past few hours. He decided not to mention this to Lisbon however, who was too busy reeling off the most colourful selection of words he had heard in a long time.

"She's crowning" the midwife shouted excitedly "Mr Lisbon, do you want to come and see?"

"I…uh…" Jane spluttered.

Lisbon groaned loudly and he quickly returned to encouraging her.

Not long after that it was all over and there was a flurry of activity around the room. Jane remained by Lisbon's exhausted form, unable to get her to relinquish her hold on his hand.

"I'm so proud of you" he said quietly to her, squeezing her shoulder with his spare hand "you did it"

Lisbon murmured something unintelligible in response and turned her head over to shoot him an exhausted smile. Her face was red and blotchy from both the effort and tears, and her hair was frizzy and moist with sweat but Jane had never wanted to kiss her more in his life.

"Where is she?" Lisbon asked, suddenly very aware that she hadn't even seen the small human she'd just managed to push out of her body "why can't I see her?"

She pushed her self up and looked frantically around the room, whilst Jane tried to calm her down and explain that they'd taken her next door because she needed her airways cleared so she could breathe properly.

"Is she ok?" Lisbon asked "is something wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong" a nurse answered her as she walked back in "here she is"

She placed the tiny bundle into Lisbon's arms and then stepped away to let the small family get acquainted with one another.

Lisbon finally let go of Jane to reach out and tentatively trace her finger across the tiny face.

"Hello" she murmured, blinking rapidly to hold back the tears which had suddenly appeared "hello baby"

Jane leant in and slid one arm around her back and the other round her front to cup the child's tiny head.

"She's so tiny" Lisbon whispered "look at her Jane"

"She's perfect" Jane nodded, turning his head and pressing a kiss to her temple.

Neither of them could bring themselves to drag their eyes away from the little bundle in Lisbon's arms. She was awake, and staring at the people above her with her huge blue eyes as if to ask what exactly was going on. Jane moved his hand and stroked the end of her nose gently, and she shuffled slightly in surprise, making both parents smile slightly. The hustle and bustle of the nurses in the room around them felt like it was miles away, as they watched every tiny movement their new daughter made.

Jane turned his head towards Lisbon and pressed a lingering kiss on her cheek. Lisbon looked up at him in surprise and he leant forward again. She knew exactly what was happening: Jane was leaning in to kiss her. She had plenty of time to react; to turn her head, to duck, to push him away…but she held her ground. Jane's lips met hers so softly she could barely feel it. He pressed a little harder, as if he was about to deepen the kiss and then a movement in Lisbon's arms caused them both to jump apart.

They were mesmerised again as the tiny human shuffled a little and the yawned and closed her eyes, unaware of how her small action had affected the important events taking place just above her. Jane moved his hand to caress her small cheek, marvelling at the fresh softness of her skin. He turned his head away suddenly and Lisbon spun around to see his face contorted and his eyes glistening.

"I'm sorry" he muttered, his voice higher than usual "I was so determined to be cool about this"

"Oh hush Jane" Lisbon replied, suddenly sounding very cop-like "we made a tiny perfect human and you're worried someone might see you cry?"

He shrugged and made a non-committal noise, mostly because he knew there was no chance of him saying anything without bawling right now. He blinked a few times and let out a deep breath to regain control of himself.

"Do you want to hold her?" Lisbon asked suddenly, nudging him with her elbow.

He nodded and extracted his arm from around her to pick up the delicate parcel. Lisbon gave him a watery smile and leant her head against his shoulder as he marvelled at his daughter. She had seen many smiles from Jane over the years. Most commonly it had been his charming smile that had women of all ages throwing themselves at him, or his smug 'I told you so' smirk. The expression on his face was one she could only recall seeing on a handful of occasions. He looked so genuine and happy, with no trace of his need to impress and charm others.

After a few minutes one of the nurses came over and explained that they needed to move Lisbon through to recovery and take the baby to be weighed and checked. Jane blinked back yet more tears as the child was extracted from his arms and was then ushered through after Lisbon.

There was a gentle knock at the door and both Jane and Lisbon looked up from staring in amazement at their sleeping daughter.

"It's Grace" a voice sounded through the door "we can come back, if it's-"

"No, come in" Lisbon called "she's sleeping" she added, suddenly lowering her voice.

The door opened and the remaining three members of the team walked in. Van Pelt was beaming and holding a large bunch of flowers, which she immediately bestowed upon Lisbon. Rigsby looked happy but a little nervous, and Cho looked like he always did. When Jane beckoned them over to meet the baby the corners of Cho's mouth actually turned up a little.

"She's gorgeous" Van Pelt said softly.

"She is" Rigsby agreed "does she have a name?"

"Not yet" Lisbon sighed, unable to tear her eyes away from her daughter "We have Isabelle or Abigail or Chloe but…" she trailed off.

"They just don't seem right" Jane explained, letting his hand hang in the crib and gently touch the baby's head.

"I like Abigail" Van Pelt shrugged "if I ever had a baby I always imagined calling her Eleanor or Sophie" she smiled.

"Abigail?" Lisbon looked at Jane hopefully, and then her face fell "and I thought giving birth was the most difficult bit"

"Lily?" Cho said, and everyone turned to look at him "she looks like one" he added.

"Lily" Lisbon repeated slowly "Lil-y"

Jane looked at her for a second, deep in thought.

"Actually" he began "she does look like a Lily"

"It's one of the few names that doesn't make me think of a past victim or a suspect" Lisbon added.

"Ever the cop, Lisbon" Jane murmured with a smile "wait, Lily Lisbon. We couldn't do that to a child"

"Why not Lily Jane?" Lisbon pointed out.

"Oh come on Lisbon, I don't want this poor child to have the Jane history weighing down on her"

"But-"

"Besides, Lisbon is just a nicer surname" he added, cutting off her protests before she could even begin.

"Fine" Lisbon shrugged "so not Lily. Any more ideas Cho?"

"Rose, Maggie or Ella" he said after a moment of thought.

"You have a gift, man" Rigsby commented, grinning at his friend.

"I like Ella" Jane said, looking at Lisbon "actually I really like it"

"Ella Lisbon" Lisbon tried "Ella Jane"

"Ella Lisbon" Jane reminded her "I'd be happy with that, and if I've read you correctly then you're trying to think of a way to thank Cho for his brilliant suggestions"

They all smiled at Jane's comment, as Lisbon continued to stare at her child.

"Was I right?" Jane asked her.

"You know you were" Lisbon replied, rolling her eyes "Ella Lisbon" she tested it again.

"You could do Lisbon-Jane" Rigsby suggested "or Jane-Lisbon"

As if she was aware that they were discussing her, the baby started to shuffle and slowly came to. She stared at the faces looking down at her for a few seconds, and then let out a whimper, that quickly became a wail.

Jane scooped her out and tried to calm her down.

"She can't be hungry can she?" Lisbon fretted "I just fed her. Do they need feeding that often?"

"She's just confused" Jane explained as the crying subsided "she's spent months living in a cocoon and suddenly she's woken up in this odd world"

"Odd is the word" Van Pelt commented, and then blushed when they all turned to look at her "uh we should get going, leave you in peace"

"And we have to be at work in a few hours" Rigsby pointed out.

They said their goodbyes and then Cho went in search of a vending machine, leaving Rigsby and Van Pelt walking the corridors together.

"I want one" Van Pelt said suddenly.

"A candy bar? I'm sure you could text Cho and-"

"No, a baby" Van Pelt clarified.

She looked at her fiancé, unaware of how he would react to such a comment.

"Obviously if one is enough I understand" Van Pelt continued, taking Rigsby's silence to mean that he didn't know how to tell her that he didn't "I mean Ben means so much to me, and I completely get if-"

"What's the time?" Rigsby cut in suddenly.

"Nearly 4am, why?"

"So that gives us 3 hours to get home and start working on that"

Van Pelt stopped and stared at him.

"Grace, I love you" he said, stepping towards his fiancée and placing his hands on her waist "and sure, when we first got together the idea of having a child with anyone would have made me run faster than Jane from a gun" he smiled "but right now, the idea of us having a child together makes me even happier than I ever imagined a person could be"

"You mean that?"

"Every single word" he replied, leaning down to press a chaste kiss on her lips.

"Well, we better hurry up and get back then" she said, smiling shyly at him "are you sure though? This is massive"

"I think if we don't go home right now then I'm going to start trawling this hospital for a spare bed or broom closet"

"Maybe I'd like that" she whispered huskily, and then pulled away and started to walk towards the way out.

"Oh Grace" Rigsby muttered after her "what on earth did I do to deserve you?"

Lisbon fell asleep not long after the rest of the team had left, after the most exhausting 24 hours of her life. A nurse came in and took Ella away to the nursery as Lisbon slept, much to Jane's disappointment. Jane watched her chest rise and fall gently, deep in thought. It was the first chance he'd had to stop and think about what had just happened. Unsurprisingly, his thoughts had floated back to the last time he had been in the maternity ward of a hospital.

He could remember holding Charlotte for the first time, just seconds after she had been born when the midwife dragged him over and thrust the screaming, messy infant into his hands. He had been absolutely petrified. Afterwards, as Angela slept and he stared at his newborn child in amazement, he promised to love and protect her. He felt a tinge of sadness as his mind flashed to the image of his beautiful child as he had found her on that fateful evening, but he pushed the memory away. He was so tired of remembering them in a painful, self hating way. He wanted to remember them as the joy of his life that they had been, remembering what he had had instead of what was taken away from him.

His thoughts moved to the beautiful woman lying asleep in the bed bedside him. He had absolutely no idea what he had done to deserve meeting her after what he had done to his family. He had never imagined being able to love anyone again, after Angela had gone, yet over the years and without meaning to, Lisbon had progressed from a colleague to a close friend to the most important person in his life. He wasn't sure how she had managed to break through the wall he built up around himself after his family's deaths, but she had done it. He wasn't really sure what their earlier kiss had meant either. It had been a spur of the moment thing for him – the result of such overpowering feelings of pride and love towards her. But she hadn't stopped him. She knew what he felt towards her, and he was fairly certain she returned the feelings – but why wouldn't she act on it? They'd known each other for so long, they lived together, and they even had a child together now, what was holding her back from him?

Lisbon shuffled a bit on the bed beside him and her eyes fluttered open slowly.

"Hey" she muttered, smiling a little at him.

"Hey yourself" he grinned back "how are you feeling?"

"Tired and sore" she replied, yawning "how long have I been asleep?"

"A couple of hours. They took Ella to the nursery to let you rest" he explained, before she could notice she was missing and start worrying.

"Are you sure about the name then?"

"Completely" he nodded "and I know you love it"

"Good old Cho"

They settled in a comfortable silence for a few minutes, as Lisbon picked at a loose thread on the comforter.

"Jane" she began tentatively "what did you mean, when you kissed me?"

"When? Today, or in Santa Cruz?"

"Both actually" she shrugged "you were about to say…something, and I stopped you. Did you…do you still…" she trailed off.

"Do I still love you?" he asked, and she nodded shyly.

"Teresa" he said softly "I couldn't stop if I wanted to"

"Oh"

Lisbon couldn't help the smile that appeared on her face. Jane picked up the hand that lay nearest to him on the bed and stroked it gently for a few seconds, before lowering his head to it and pressing a kiss onto her knuckles.

They were interrupted by the door bursting open and a nurse carrying their wailing baby walked in.

"Oh good, you're awake" she smiled at Lisbon, who pushed herself into a sitting position "she's hungry" the nurse explained "have you fed her before?"

"Once" Lisbon replied "the nurse helped me"

"Well give it a try by yourself this time"

Lisbon took her daughter from the nurse and adjusted her in her arms.

"I'll wait outside and give you some privacy" the nurse told her "call me if you need any help"

Shooting Jane a slightly self conscious smile, she pulled up the thin pullover she was wearing up a bit and then froze.

"Lisbon, I have seen your breasts before" Jane told her, rolling his eyes.

"I know" Lisbon said, blushing "but that was-"

"Different?"

Lisbon let out a sigh and then pulled the top up even more. She struggled for a few minutes, nearly calling the nurse back in for help but eventually Ella latched on and the wailing stopped.

They didn't really get much time alone to talk after that. Nurses came in and out, food arrived, Ella cried and needed feeding and changing and Lisbon dozed a couple of times. Van Pelt turned up again in the afternoon, apparently having been 'passing through' on the way to talk to someone involved in the case. Lisbon was asleep at the time, so she chatted to Jane and when Ella woke up she got the chance to hold her. It was only when Van Pelt left that Jane realised that he hadn't slept for a day and a half. He didn't really want to be asleep right now either, not when he had his semi conscious daughter in his arms and he could watch Lisbon sleeping next to him. He was happier than he could remember having been in the past 8 years, and he didn't want to miss any of it with something so unimportant as sleep.

 **A/N Phew! This chapter was difficult to write, so I hope I did it some justice. I'm sorry if there were any inaccuracies with childbirth – I've never had a child (and most likely never will), so this was based entirely on internet research.**

 **We're nearing the end now, and I'm both excited and sad because I've loved writing this story so much. Thanks for the support!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Over 100 reviews! Woooooo! Thanks to everyone who's been reading and following and reviewing! Here's a fairly fluffy thank you chapter**

 **(Also I don't think my chapter divides were showing up AGAIN, this better work!)**

It was another day before they were allowed to take Ella home. Jane felt weird as he carried his tiny daughter over the threshold to the apartment in her basket, almost as if the whole situation wasn't real and he was going to wake up in a bit and discover that he and Lisbon weren't living together and didn't have a child. Almost as soon as they walked in, Jane tried to persuade Lisbon to go and take a nap. When she argued that she had spent the last two days in bed, he shot her a look of disbelief until she relented and agreed to rest on the couch for an hour or two. That left Jane alone with his daughter for the first time.

"She's just a bit grumpy because she's not very good at admitting she needs to rest" he explained to her as he undid the straps on her basket and picked her up.

She whimpered a little at first, but after a few minutes of being rocked gently she calmed down. Jane stroked her nose and she wrinkled it up. She was still so tiny and squashed looking, and he knew that he should probably be taking advantage of the fact that she was sleepy and put her down for a bit, but he just couldn't help himself.

"I bet you're going to be just as stubborn as your mother" Jane told her softly.

"Who can hear you" Lisbon said from behind him "I've just come through for a drink" she explained quickly, before Jane could reprimand her for leaving the couch.

"It was meant as a compliment" Jane turned around and smiled at her.

"Shouldn't you be resting as well?" she asked as she sipped at a glass of water "you've barely slept for the past two days"

"I'm not tired. And we need something to eat in a bit"

"We can order in"

"After all that hospital food?" Jane raised his eyebrows "I made and froze some meals a while back for this occasion"

The child in his arms shuffled and bit and let out small wail, which quickly increased to a full on cry.

"What does that mean?" Lisbon asked quickly.

Jane bounced her up and down a little and spoke to her in a gentle voice.

"She's probably just hungry" he decided when she didn't stop.

"Right" Lisbon nodded "I'll um, go feed her I guess"

She held out her arms and Jane placed the baby in them, and then she returned to the living room. He knew she was feeling nervous about all of this, but he had complete faith in her. He was also very aware that he had already brought up one child and therefore he was a lot more familiar with everything, and the last thing he wanted was to be butting in on Lisbon. She needed to learn it all for herself as well.

oooooooooooooooooooo

Later that evening, after they had eaten and Jane had managed to get Ella to settle down to sleep, they sat side by side on the couch with the TV on quiet. Lisbon had been quite reluctant to leave her new child in a room by herself, even if she was asleep and it was only for a short time, but Jane managed to persuade her that it was best for her to get to sleep with no distractions. They had moved her cot through from the nursery to Lisbon's room, where she was sleeping for the first few weeks. Part of Jane wanted to ask if he could sleep in there as well, but he still wasn't sure exactly where their relationship stood and he didn't want to push Lisbon into anything.

"Are you ok?" she asked him suddenly "you're quiet; it's very unlike you"

"I'm just thinking"

"About?"

"You" he answered honestly.

She didn't say anything back to that, but Jane felt a soft weight appear on his shoulder as she leaned on him and pulled the blanket around her more. Deciding that this was most definitely a good sign, Jane extracted his arm from beneath her and slid it around her shoulders. Neither of them said anything for a while after that, but they remained snuggled up together on the couch until a wailing from down the hall roused them.

"I'll sort it" Lisbon said quickly "and then I think I'll go to bed myself"

"Night Lisbon. I know you're worrying about all of this new parent stuff but you're going to be amazing"

"You're just saying that"

"I mean it"

"Thanks" she stopped just before the door to turn round and look at him again "Night Jane"

Jane stayed in the living room a little longer, listening as the cries subsided and then as Lisbon shuffled around and got ready for bed. As he passed Lisbon's room on his way to bed, he couldn't help but knock on the door and enter to say goodnight to his daughter. Lisbon was sat on the edge of her bed, taking her socks off before she slept. She was still wearing her maternity pyjamas, since it would be a few days before her stomach shrank to a size which would fit in normal clothes. She smiled at him and Jane felt his mouth turn up involuntarily. There was something so contagious about the way she smiled, and he didn't know whether it was the fact that such smiles had been so rare the past few years or simply because they were _hers_ , but he always struggled not to reciprocate.

"She's gone back to sleep" she told him softly.

"I just came in to say goodnight"

"I still can't believe it's real" Lisbon said, shaking her head as Jane took a seat beside her and looked down at their daughter "I know that maybe this didn't come about in the best of ways, but I'm so glad it did. She's perfect"

"Me too" Jane nodded.

"I…I know I didn't really get a chance to respond to what you said in the hospital" Lisbon said tentatively. She'd been trying to work out a way to say this for days now "about us…but I guess I should tell you that…that I think I might just feel the same way"

"You think?" Jane looked at her with raised eyebrows, still smiling.

"Ok, I know I do" she admitted, blushing lightly.

"Well that's good" Jane said softly.

Lisbon looked at him and smiled again. Her smile was timid now, but it almost like she was fighting and failing miserably to stop the corners of her mouth turning up. He smiled back. As confessions of love went, he'd always imagined theirs (and he had imagined it more times than he could count) to be a slightly cliché yet beautiful none the less speech followed by a long passionate kiss. He had never envisaged a spontaneous kiss immediately after labour, an interrupted conversation and an indirect love declaration spread over a few days. Then again, what part of their relationship development had he expected? He had never foreseen falling in love with her, or losing all control of himself and sleeping with her. Even after that, the fact that she could have become pregnant from that night hadn't even crossed his mind. This was a perfectly fitting love proclamation for their relationship, and to Jane, it was just _perfect_.

"What do we do now?" Lisbon asked.

"Why do need to do anything?"

"I meant more that if you wanted, then, well…I guess you're welcome to stay here"

"I do live here" he reminded her.

"I was talking about my room"

Lisbon bit her lip and Jane stared at her for a few seconds; he had not been expecting that one bit.

"And just sleep" she clarified "Be near Ella. Nothing else - not that I don't want to, I mean I can't at the moment anyway…but I-"

Jane reached out and took her hand and she stopped babbling to look at him. Then he reached forward with his other hand and laid it on her cheek, his thumb stroking her cheekbone gently. He leant in slowly, his eyes on hers every inch of the way. His stare was intense, his eyes dark, but Lisbon boldly held his gaze. When their lips finally met he smiled slightly against her mouth, savouring the moment before Lisbon became slightly impatient and started to kiss him back.

This was nothing like their other kisses had been: their first kiss had been taken over by a drunken hunger; their second a more desperate and vulnerable affair; and their third had been born out of the relief and beauty of the, well, birth. This felt like coming home after a long journey. The result of 10 years of dancing around and chasing a serial killer, a drunken night and months of blaringly obvious feelings but an inability to really act on them; all of the laughs and tears which had come along the way, culminating into this moment.

It was soft and gentle, the way they caressed each other lips. Eventually Jane slid his tongue across Lisbon's lower lip and she opened her mouth willingly. He sucked on her bottom lip, eliciting a moan and causing Lisbon to slide her hands to the nape of his neck and pull him nearer.

All too soon Jane pulled away and looked at her. Her hands were still around his neck, playing with the soft strands of hair there; her eyes were dark with want.

"I would love to stay here tonight"

"That's lucky" she smiled.

"How do you always look so beautiful?" he asked, tucking a stray hair behind her ear.

"Are you always this cheesy?"

"Always" he grinned, before leaning in again to recapture her mouth.

After a few minutes of thoroughly exploring all Lisbon's mouth, Jane pulled away to press kisses down her neck.

"Jane" she sighed, sliding her fingers into his hair as he moved to her earlobe and sucked on it gently, making shivers run down her spine.

He stopped kissing her to look straight into her eyes.

"We uh..." she struggled to find the words, her mind still completely focussed on the man in front of her and his amazing lips "we should probably go to bed, before…"

 _Before I'm forced to ravish you_ she finished in her mind. It wasn't that she didn't want to, because god she did, but she just couldn't. Barely two days ago she had pushed a person out of her; she was exhausted, both mentally and physically, and she knew that she couldn't have anything near her lower regions for a good few weeks.

"You're right" he nodded.

It was more difficult than he had expected to lose contact with her, even only for a few minutes. When he returned to her room she was still sitting on the edge of her bed, resting her arms and head over the cot.

"You can't watch her all night"

"I know" she sighed "I just…it seems silly, but I just don't want to be apart from her"

"She'll be less than a metre away from you"

"I know" she repeated.

When they finally climbed into bed together, Jane found he didn't want to close his eyes simply because he enjoyed looked at Lisbon too much. Thankfully Lisbon managed to fall asleep quite fast, lying on his arm with her head turned slightly towards him. He heard Ella shuffle around in her cot a few times, and was reminded about quite how lucky a man he was right now. The woman he loved most in the world right now was asleep on his (slightly numb) arm, with his newborn child a few feet away in her cot.

oooooooooooooooooooo

Waking up in the morning with a beautiful woman in his arms and sunlight streaming across the room was a scene Jane had been lucky enough to experience a few times in his life. The following morning was not quite like that. Instead, he awoke at about 4am to the sound of wailing and Lisbon inadvertently pulling the comforter off him as she got up and reached for her child. The crying calmed a little once in her mother's arms, but Ella didn't stop completely until Lisbon started feeding her, by which point both parents were completely awake.

"Go to sleep" Lisbon told Ella softly, rocking her in her arms "come on, little one"

"She will" Jane said from behind her "she just wanted a midnight snack. Speaking of which, I could really do with some eggs right now"

"Do you ever think of anything but your stomach?"

"Of course. I think of you, Ella, the team, you, tea, suits, you, couches…"

"Go back to sleep" she said, rolling her eyes in the semi darkness.

Lisbon continued to rock Ella for a few minutes, until she let out a few wails and it became apparent that sleep wasn't an option anytime soon.

"Why won't she sleep?"

"Have you tried burping her?"

"I forgot" Lisbon replied quietly "oh god, I really suck at this already"

"You don't suck at this at all"

She moved the child around so Jane could see the top of her head poking over Lisbon's shoulder. He smiled at her and blew her a kiss.

"Do you have a-" Jane started, just as Ella hiccupped and a dribble of milk ran down Lisbon's shoulder and back "Don't worry"

After a few minutes of burping her, Lisbon decided she was finished and tried rocking her to sleep again. Apparently Ella had decided that sleep was off the table now, and every time Lisbon tried to put her back in her cot she started to cry until she was picked up again. Lisbon was getting increasingly frustrated now, and turned round to look at Jane for answers. He sat up almost immediately when he realised how close to tears she was.

"Give her to me" he offered "and go and change your top and get back into bed. I'll sort it"

"But I-"

"You're exhausted, I'm not" he held his arms out.

Lisbon relented and handed the baby to him. He disappeared out of the room and Lisbon found a different pyjama top in a drawer and put it on, leaving the other on the floor of her room. She climbed back into bed and lay down, feeling like she was about to cry. She knew that it was mostly from fatigue and hormones, but she felt like she had failed as a mother already. She turned off the bedside lamp and curled up under the duvet.

20 minutes later she heard Jane come back in. He put Ella down in her cot, and then tiptoed back round to 'his' side of the bed and climbed in. Lisbon feigned sleep, until she felt an arm slide over her torso and Jane's warm breath on the side of her neck.

"You need to stop worrying about your abilities as a parent" Jane murmured "it's been three days, and the first few weeks are always the hardest"

"I know" she replied, giving up on pretending to be asleep "but you're just so good with her, and I feel so clueless"

"And I've done this before" he reminded her gently "just sleep Lisbon. You'll get the hang of it all in no time"

He kissed her on the neck and then moved away, only leaving his hand touching hers in the middle of the bed.

ooooooooooooooooooooooo

The next few weeks were hard for both of them. Although growing increasingly confident, Lisbon continued to be intimidated by the fact that they were responsible for her daughter's tiny life. Jane hated watching how insecure she was about all of this, but at the same time was reluctant to try and help her out too much in case she though that it was his way of admitting that she really was incapable, which she wasn't at all. In fact, she was doing an amazing job, but in true perfectionist style every tiny mistake became a sign that she was failing.

The team came over to visit them a few times (notably Van Pelt appeared at their door much more frequently than the other two), and Stan flew up for a day to meet his niece. Then Gable rung Jane and asked if there was any way he could come in and help with one of the cases. It was the same one they'd been working on just before Ella was born, and after the team had managed to link another 3 cases to the original it became apparent that this was a serial killer, and a meticulous one at that. Jane was very reluctant to end his paternity leave early, but Lisbon (ever the cop) convinced him that catching a dangerous killer was more important than sitting around at home with her.

After two days of being at home alone with Ella, Lisbon decided that she needed to go out. It hadn't been so bad when Jane had been there to distract her and they could take it in turns to get groceries, but now she was starting to feel increasingly trapped in her own apartment. She changed Ella into a slightly thicker babygro and secured her to her chest with the baby wrap. They walked around the local park a couple of times, and then stopped at a corner shop to pick up some food for dinner and a couple of packs of nappies. When they arrived back at the apartment Lisbon decided that she wasn't quite done for the day. She changed Ella's nappy, and then drove the very familiar route to the CBI. She knew Jane wouldn't be happy with her coming in when she was meant to be at home recuperating on maternity leave, but she hadn't seen her team for days and she was desperate to know what was going on in all of their cases. Besides, there was always the chance that he was out talking to someone.

"Boss!"

Van Pelt was the first to notice her, and immediately raced over to greet both of them.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, still concentrating on saying hello to Ella.

"I needed to get out" she explained, waving at Cho as he spotted her "is Jane about?"

As if he had heard her speak, Jane suddenly appeared.

"My favourite girl is here" he grinned, stroking Ella's head in greeting "and her daughter"

Lisbon rolled her eyes and Van Pelt giggled. Lisbon didn't quite not what Jane had said to the team the past couple of days, but she was fairly sure that he hadn't mentioned the development in their relationship. Since they were still getting used to the fact that they were finally together, she wanted to keep it between the two of them for a while. Besides, they had thrown quite a lot at the team the past few months – having a child, moving in together, being away on maternity and paternity leave – they didn't need another change in the dynamics.

"She's gotten so big already" Van Pelt exclaimed, as Lisbon unstrapped Ella and handed her to Jane "and I only saw her last week"

"Well she's had a lot of growing to do" Lisbon shrugged "she was quite small when she was born"

"Come on, little one" Jane muttered to his daughter as he kissed her on the head "come and meet the place where all the magic happens – my beautiful couch"

Lisbon couldn't help but smile as Jane wandered away with Ella, explaining to her in great detail exactly what he loved so much about this particular couch.

"What's new on the cases then?"

"Not a lot. Jane came up with a couple of things once he'd caught up on stuff, but I get the feeling that his focus isn't completely on CBI work any more"

Both of them looked over at where Jane was now seated on the couch, still chatting away and pointing at the Elvis stain on the ceiling.

"I can imagine" Lisbon agreed.

"Te…Lisbon" Jane called over to her; halfway through an overview of the latest case they had been assigned "do you have a bottle?"

"Oh, yeah" Lisbon dug through her bag, finding a bottle of pre-pumped milk buried under blankets and nappies "do you want me to warm it?"

"I'll do it. My tea cup is next on the list of things to meet anyway"

"What were you saying?" Lisbon turned back to Van Pelt, who had a bemused smile on her face at the domesticity of her boss and colleague.

"The coroner's report" she said, shaking her head a little to get back on topic "so they've been looking really carefully at the blunt force trauma, and…"

When she left the CBI, Lisbon was feeling a whole lot more like Agent Lisbon than she had for weeks. She had become so caught up in being Ella's mother she had almost forgotten what it was like to be in the bullpen, looking at crime scene photos and background checks. She had managed to persuade Cho to give her copies of some case files to look over at home, and Van Pelt had brought her up to date on everything that had happened the past weeks – both regarding the cases and office gossip.

Jane walked her back to the parking lot, still carrying Ella. It took them a surprisingly long time to make their way there as they passed fellow agents who stopped to coo at Ella and congratulate both parents.

"I wish I could go home with you" Jane admitted to Lisbon in the privacy of the elevator "I miss you both all day"

"We're surviving just fine" Lisbon reassured him "anyway I'll be back here too in a couple of weeks"

"I've been thinking about going part time" Jane said suddenly.

"What?"

They'd discussed what would happen with regards to returning to work, and had already picked a day-care for Ella.

"I like my job but it's not like you need me there all the time" he explained "I mean you've said it yourself so many times; I spend half the time lazing around on a couch, which I could easily do in our living room, whilst still working on a case"

"You don't have to do this" Lisbon countered "we've found an amazing nursery, and we've know that she'll be perfectly safe there"

As soon as they had started looking into day-cares, Lisbon had jokingly suggested checking out all of the staff on the CBI database. Jane had decided that that was in fact a brilliant idea, and before she could stop him had called Van Pelt and got her started on it.

"Don't pretend you're not worried about being away from her all the time"

"I'm not exactly looking forward to leaving her" Lisbon admitted "but I don't want you to think that you have to, we both know that she'll be fine"

"I _want_ to, Teresa. I've missed her so much the past two days, and that's with knowing that she's perfectly safe with you. I can't imagine leaving her alone all day in some day-care centre"

"I…why don't we talk about this later?"

"Sure" Jane nodded.

He insisted on walking Lisbon all the way to the car, and kissing Ella goodbye before he secured her in her car seat.

"I'll be back in a couple of hours" he promised her "be good for Mommy"

"She's been an Angel all morning" Lisbon reassured him "well, except for one little incident with my favourite shirt"

"Meh, it's just a shirt" he dismissed it "although that's not your green one is it?"

"White" Lisbon shook her head "what's with the green one anyway?"

"It brings out your eyes"

"And…?"

"It's a beautiful, slightly translucent fabric" he admitted.

"You are such a man at heart" she snorted.

"Am I not man enough on the outside?"

"You're just very…Jane on the outside"

"Just you wait, Agent Lisbon" he muttered, leaning in to kiss her on the cheek "sometime soon I'll be able to show you quite how manly I can really be"

"I can't wait" she murmured back, winking at him and shooting him a grin.

"Your mother is a bad, bad woman" he told Ella, who was dozing in her car seat next to them "now go, before I'm forced to come back with you"


	16. Chapter 16

**Wow, sorry for the wait! I've been so busy trying to send off my college applications before the deadline (I don't know what's happened to me; I'm normally someone who has everything sorted months in advance instead of putting it all together on the day) and writing my Christmas oneshot (if anyone wants to check it out).**

 **Not a huge amount happens in this chapter, but I'm just trying to tie everything together as we come towards the end of this story :'( but it is most definitely M rated at the end ;)**

"I'm back" Jane called out as he entered their apartment. He'd long since learnt not to enter unannounced when he lived with a cop.

"We're in here" Lisbon called from the kitchen.

Jane hung his coat up and took his shoes off, before heading through to find her and his daughter. Ella was in her basket on the work surface. Her eyes were open and she seemed perfectly content to stare around the room and occasionally wave her arms at nothing in particular. Jane waved and blew a kiss to her, and then turned his attention to the other person in the room. Lisbon had her back to him as she leant over the side beside Ella, reading what seemed to be a case file. Jane watched the pair of them for a few minutes, before he crossed the room and slid his arms around Lisbon's waist and pressed a kiss on her neck.

"Hello" he murmured into her skin.

"Hello you" she said softly back, twisting round in his arms to face him.

Jane pressed a kiss to her lips and then held her in his arms.

"How was the doctor's?"

"Fine" Lisbon shrugged "Ella's gaining enough weight, and I'm finally allowed to exercise again"

Lisbon had been going crazy about not being allowed to start running again the past few weeks. She decided not to mention the _other_ thing that the doctor had now cleared her for, though.

"That's good"

"It is, I can't wait to get rid of this baby fat"

"Lisbon, I see no baby fat" Jane rolled his eyes at her "not that it would matter anyway, you did just have a baby"

"It's definitely there" Lisbon insisted.

Jane pushed a strand of hair behind her ear and then kissed her again. There was little point fighting with Lisbon when she was so convinced of something.

"Are you free on Friday night?"

"You know I am, why?"

The tiny line that appeared between her eyebrows whenever she was confused about something was there, and Jane grinned involuntarily.

"Well…would you like to go for dinner with me?"

"Like a date?"

"Exactly like a date" he grinned again.

"But aren't we a little…I don't know, past that?"

"Lisbon, I want to take you out. Do you want to go or not?"

"I'd love to" she admitted "but…what about Ella?"

Jane let go of Lisbon and took his daughter out of her basket.

"Ella" he said, stroking her dark hair "can spend the evening with her Auntie Grace and Uncle Rigsby. Grace offered" he added.

"Did she? That's sweet" Lisbon said "but I…"

"Teresa, Ella will be perfectly fine for a few hours"

"I know" Lisbon murmured.

"Brilliant" he grinned "so I'll pick you up at 7?"

"Alright then" she smiled at him.

As if she knew that she would be missing out on her parents company in a few days time, Ella fussed a little. This quickly turned into full on crying.

"What's up, little one?" Jane cooed, rocking her gently.

"I fed her half an hour ago" Lisbon frowned "she can't be hungry again"

"No" Jane muttered, holding up his crying daughter to inspect her "I think…yup, someone needs a new diaper"

"Your turn" Lisbon said quickly.

"I know, I know" he rolled his eyes at her "come on Ella, let's go and sort you out"

oooooooooooooooooooo

As Friday rolled round, Lisbon was both excited and apprehensive for a plethora of reasons. Friday meant a date with Jane; something she'd secretly dreamt of for so long. It meant an evening of relaxation, with no listening out for crying or feeding or diaper changing. It could even mean finally sleeping together again. On the other hand, it meant leaving her daughter with someone else for hours. She trusted Rigsby and Van Pelt with her life (literally, on many occasions), and she knew that they were more than capable of looking after a child for an evening, but she was still dreading being away from her for so long. Logically, she knew that in a weeks time she was due to be back at work and would have to be away from Ella for most of the week (another reason why Friday approaching scared her) but she knew that the first time without her would be the hardest.

And then there was the possibility of sex. She hadn't mentioned to Jane that there was no longer anything stopping them from sleeping together. She wanted to – probably more than she'd ever wanted to sleep with someone – but she was scared. On a practical level, she was worried it about the fact that it was barely six weeks since she had given birth. Just because some doctor told her she was all healed, it didn't mean that sex would immediately be pain-free and pleasurable. The main reason, however, was simply that she was nervous. The last – and only – time they had slept together they had both been drunk. Although she remembered most of what had happened, it was a hazy, inebriated memory. This time she wouldn't be drunk, and even though they kissed every day and slept in the same bed she was still very aware that Jane was, well, Jane. She was also very aware that her body wasn't in exactly the same shape it had been before. Lisbon wasn't normally a self-conscious woman, but after years of being toned and flat she wasn't comfortable with being slightly…softer. Jane had told her repeatedly that she was just the same, and that it didn't matter anyway, but she would rather have waited until she was back to her normal self before letting anyone see her _like that_. Still, she was determined not to let silly insecurities hold her back if that opportunity did arise (if you pardon the pun).

A wail roused her from her thoughts. She'd put Ella down for a nap in her cot whilst she tried to focus on a case file, but apparently Ella wasn't in the mood for a nap. After half an hour of attempted feeding, changing and rocking, Lisbon still had no idea exactly what she wanted. Every now and then she calmed down a bit, only to start crying as soon as Lisbon tried to put her down to sleep. In the end she placed her screaming child in the baby wrap and attached it to her chest, then took her for a walk.

When she returned home, Ella was fast asleep. Afraid that she would start fussing again if left alone, Lisbon kept her attached to herself as she settled down to try and focus on the case file.

"Hi" Jane called as he entered the apartment.

"How are my two favourite girls?" he asked as he came into the living room, coming to kiss Ella's head.

"Shhhh" Lisbon warned him "She's-"

As if on cue, Ella's eyes fluttered open and she stared around her for a little while, before her face scrunched up as she began crying again.

"Sleeping" Lisbon finished "she cried for ages, I'd just got her down"

"Did you feed her? Or change her?" Jane asked.

"Of course I did" Lisbon snapped "I did everything I've been told and she still wouldn't stop, and now you've started her again"

"I was just asking" Jane said, holding his hands up in surrender "she'll settle down again, I'm sure. Why don't I go and sort her out?"

"I can look after my own daughter, Jane"

"I know that, but she's my daughter as well and you need to stop stressing about leaving her tonight"

"I'm not stressing"

"High voice, Lisbon, high voice"

"Maybe I am stressing a little" she admitted, as Ella's cries subsided a little "but I feel bad enough that she has to sleep in her own room, and now we're abandoning her for the night. What if she thinks we're not coming back?"

"Firstly, you know that all three of us sleep better with this arrangement" Jane pointed out "and secondly, she won't even notice that Grace and Rigsby aren't us"

"And that makes me feel so much better" Lisbon said dryly.

"I'm going to make some tea" Jane said suddenly "do you want some?"

"Alright" Lisbon shrugged, slipping her arms out of the baby wrap to rock Ella.

It didn't take to long for Ella to calm down this time, and once she was back to sleep Lisbon decided to put her down in her cot for an hour or so.

"Here"

Jane was back, holding out a cup of tea.

"Thanks" Lisbon muttered as she took it from him "sorry for snapping at you"

"It's alright" he shrugged, sitting down beside her.

They drank their tea together in a comfortable silence until Lisbon spoke again, any trace of her previous irritation gone.

"So where are we going tonight?"

"It's a secret" he grinned at her.

"Do I get to know anything?"

"Wear something nice, but comfortable" he said nonchalantly "and a coat"

"That's helpful"

"Are Grace and Rigsby coming here?"

"No, we'll drop her off on the way. It's nearer to where we're going" he leant forward to read her watch "and we're leaving in an hour"

"How's the case going?"

"The latest? Nearly closed"

"How can it be 'nearly closed'?" Lisbon asked.

"Cho is making us get some of that flamboyant 'proof' before he'll arrest the killer"

"Oh yeah, proof does tend to get in the way" she snorted.

"I did consider putting my own plan into action this afternoon, but I decided I'd rather come back and see you"

"I'm flattered" she rolled her eyes "I'm so glad that you left a dangerous criminal on the loose to come back and spend time with me"

"Meh" he shrugged "she's not dangerous unless you've cheated on her with her sister"

"Just to check, you haven't done that?"

"Not so far" he joked.

"That's a relief"

oooooooooooooooooooo

It took Lisbon about twenty minutes to get ready for her date with Jane. She took 'nice but comfortable' to be jeans, a blouse and a leather jacket, and as she stood in front of her mirror she decided that it was a good decision. She looked casual, but nice enough for a date. She felt comfortable in her clothing choice, and that was the most important thing. She chose to apply her makeup in a fairly natural way, seeing as Jane knew exactly what she looked like and there was no point hiding beneath a layer of cosmetics. Just as she stood back to check the final touches, there was a knock at the apartment door.

"Jane" she called "can you get the door?"

There was no response and the knock sounded again. Lisbon sighed and left her room.

She opened the door to reveal Jane, wearing a suit without a vest for a change and holding a large bunch of flowers. Lisbon couldn't help the surprised laugh that escaped her.

"I said I would pick you at 7" he grinned, holding out the flowers for her "you look lovely"

"Thanks, am I ok? I'm not too casual am I?"

"You're perfect" he grinned, leaning down to kiss her cheek "you ready? I have a feeling your babysitter is expecting you in 15 minutes"

"I just need to get Ella's stuff together, and then we can go"

"Done it" he said, following her back into their apartment "she's all ready in the living room"

The drive to Van Pelt and Rigsby's was short, and Lisbon felt the familiar bubble of dread growing in her stomach at the thought of leaving her child. When they arrived and Van Pelt started to coo over Ella however, Lisbon calmed a little. Jane was right; Ella would be absolutely fine with her friends.

Jane had told them that this was a practise for leaving Ella at day-care the following week so Rigsby looked a little surprised when his boss walked in made up and wearing a slightly different outfit than one she would wear to the office, but he said nothing.

"Thanks for this, Rigs" Lisbon told him, her eyes still glued to Ella in Jane's arms "I've got spare diapers, a couple of bottles, a new-"

"Boss, it's fine" he reassured her.

"I know" she nodded "can you send me a couple of texts though? Just so I can make sure"

"We will" Van Pelt told her "just have a nice evening"

"Thanks" Lisbon nodded "I uh, guess we should go"

Jane kissed his daughter goodbye and then handed her to Lisbon, who suddenly found herself blinking rapidly to battle the tears which had suddenly appeared.

"Be good Ella" she muttered "we'll be back – I promise – and Rigsby and Grace will look after you"

Jane put his hand comfortingly on her shoulder and she realised that she needed to end her goodbye. Lisbon handed her child reluctantly to Van Pelt, and then allowed Jane to lead her away.

"She'll be fine" Jane reassured her.

"I know" Lisbon nodded "I didn't realise how hard this would be"

"I felt the same way, the first time we left Charlotte" he admitted.

"Was it ok?"

"I faked illness and came home halfway through dinner" he explained, and Lisbon smiled "she hadn't even woken up; she had no idea we'd left"

They sat in silence for the rest of the ride, and Jane eventually parked in an area of Sacramento Lisbon didn't know particularly well. He got out and then opened her door, bowing theatrically and making a big thing of taking her hand and kissing it. She laughed and then let him direct her into the building in front of them with his hand on the small of her back. It looked more like an office than a restaurant, and Lisbon started to wonder what she'd got herself into. They were greeted by a man in who showed them the way to the elevator, and told them which floor to select.

"What is this?" Lisbon asked, once the elevator doors were safely shut.

"You'll see" he grinned at her.

Lisbon narrowed her eyes at him, and then looked around the elevator for any clues. When it reached their floor the sounds of chatter reached their ears, and Jane simply grinned at her again before giving her a little nudge to move. They turned the corner, only to be greeted by the sight of peoples sat around at little tables, with waiters rushing about and a cheerful atmosphere.

"Ohh" Lisbon muttered in realisation.

It was a restaurant on the top floor, which overlooked the river and much of Sacramento. Most of the guests were seated outside, under some sort of canopy with red heat lamps around to keep them comfortably warm. Jane said something unintelligible to a waiter, who led them out the doors to a table right at the edge.

"You can see the CBI from here" Jane told her "just…there"

"Jane" she murmured "this is lovely"

"The food's meant to be good" he shrugged.

She looked at him for a moment and noticed a hint of something that hadn't been there earlier. He looked almost…nervous. Before she could mention it, the waiter arrived to take their drinks orders.

"I'll have a Grenache Rosé" Lisbon decided after looking over the menu and trying to hide her shock at the prices.

"And a Chardonnay" Jane said "and change hers to a Provence, please"

"Jane" she hissed as the waiter exchanged their wine lists for food menus and left.

"Oh come on Teresa, I don't care how expensive it is"

"I didn't-"

"Yes you did" he cut in "I know you prefer that type but you thought it was too expensive. You can hide nothing from me, woman"

Lisbon glared at him and then picked up the menu.

"So, tell me about yourself" Jane said as their drinks arrived.

"What?" her eyes flicked up from the menu.

"This is a first date, isn't that what people talk about?"

"Jane, this is _us_ " she reminded him "I've known you for nearly 10 years!"

"Just humour me, Lisbon"

"Fine, what do you want to know?" she relented.

"What do you do?"

"I'm a cop; A CBI Agent" she clarified.

"Ah, that's interesting" he nodded, managing to look completely natural "tell me more about that"

"I lead a Serious Crimes Unit" she explained "we solve crimes; normally murders"

"Wow" he raised his eyebrows and she rolled her eyes at him "do you enjoy it?"

"Mostly" she shrugged "it's just that I have this one colleague – my consultant – who must be the most annoying man alive. He manages to piss someone off nearly every day, and he makes my life hell"

"Come on, just play along Lisbon" he implored.

"Fine" she said again "tell me about your job"

"Well" he began, back in character "I actually do something very similar to you, but I'm a consultant as opposed to an actual cop"

"Oh really? Do you like it as well?"

"It's great" he replied "although the best part by far is getting to spend so much time with my beautiful colleague, who chooses to wear these amazingly tight jeans on occasion and I can't help but-"

"Seriously Jane?"

"You started it" he pointed out.

oooooooooooooooooooo

Their dinner turned out to be delicious, and Jane refused to let Lisbon even look at the bill when it came to paying. She had only checked her phone a handful of times for updates on Ella, after which point Jane threatened to confiscate it and she relented and returned it to her bag after making sure it was on loud. Despite having had a lovely evening, Lisbon couldn't help but feel very relieved as the car pulled up outside Van Pelt and Rigsby's apartment block.

"Hi" Lisbon said when Van Pelt answered the door, trying not to make it obvious that she was peering over her shoulder for a glimpse of her daughter "how was she?"

"She was great" Van Pelt answered "come in"

They followed her through to the living room where they finally saw Ella, fast asleep in her basket beside Rigsby.

"Hi" he greeted them "you've got the perfect baby; she only cried once the whole evening"

"Oh good" Lisbon nodded, her eyes glued to her daughter.

"How was dinner?"

"Lovely" Jane answered "good practise for next week"

"Of course, Boss coming back to work" Rigsby nodded.

"Well thanks so much for having her" Lisbon told them.

"It was a pleasure" Van Pelt replied "really, ask us anytime"

"Thanks" Lisbon repeated "we should get going"

Lisbon was relieved to be finally reunited with her daughter when Rigsby handed the basket over, although she was only able to stroke her head without fear of waking her. She let Jane drive them home, mostly so that she could turn round every few minutes to look at her sleeping daughter again.

Lisbon fed Ella and put her to bed when they returned to their apartment, before heading into the kitchen to find Jane nursing a cup of tea.

"She's fast asleep again" Lisbon told him.

"Oh good" he nodded, putting down his tea cup "do you feel better about next week now?"

"Sort of" she shrugged "at least I know that she'll be with you for the first day, and that's no problem. It's Tuesday when she goes to day-care that I'm worried about"

"It's only one day, I'll be back with her for Wednesday"

"I know" Lisbon sighed "if only I could just take her to work with me on the other days"

"I wouldn't complain" he smiled "but day-care will be good for her, it helps build up social skills"

"Yeah" Lisbon nodded sadly, before stepping forward and nestling against Jane's chest.

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her head. They stayed like that for a few minutes, and then Lisbon raised her head to look at him and Jane took the opportunity to press his lips against hers. They kissed softly for a few minutes, and then Jane pulled his mouth away to start trailing kisses down the side of her neck and sucking gently on her earlobe. Lisbon sighed and found his mouth again, sliding her hands into his jacket and running them up and down his back. There was something different about this kiss and both of them knew it; there was a sort of purpose that hadn't been there before.

Jane placed his hands on her waist and pulled her flush to him. She could feel his erection pressed against her stomach, and she let out a tiny mew of appreciation before pulling away from the kiss. He looked questioningly at her for a few seconds, before she smiled coyly and then took hold of his hand. She led him out of the kitchen and down the hallway to their bedroom, where she pushed the door shut behind them and then pulled him to her by his jacket. Jane had a fairly good idea where this was going now, but he decided to let her lead. Maybe it was because he had fallen in love with his team leader, but there was something immensely attractive about her being the one calling the shots.

"Teresa" he murmured as she pulled away from his mouth for a second, only to grin at him and undo his first shirt button.

He captured her mouth again as she worked her way down his shirt, and then let her hands play across his bare chest. As one hand brushed ever slightly too low on his stomach (he had a feeling it was entirely intentional) he had had enough, and he responded by pushing her jacket onto the floor and working on her own shirt buttons. Her hand slid down his stomach again and this time there was no way its contact with his crotch could have been accidental. He let out a slight groan, which only encouraged her to tug his shirt and jacket off and drop them on the floor.

They undressed each other slowly, caressing and kissing all the way until they stood in nothing but underwear. When Jane slid his hands up her back and undid her bra, Lisbon suddenly realised how silly her previous self-consciousness had been. Jane was staring at her in utter wonder, his eyes dark and his mouth ever so slightly open as he took in the sight. They came together again and Lisbon finally pushed Jane's boxers down for him to step out of. She did the same with her own before pulling him with both hands towards her bed.

On the occasions the past few weeks where Jane had imagined making love to Lisbon for the first proper time, he had always pictured it to be slow and gentle. In reality, it did at least begin like that.

After rolling around and kissing a bit, he finally slid into her slowly with his eyes on hers the whole way to look for any discomfort or pain. Thankfully there was none, and he allowed himself to start thrusting into her gently, and then a little faster. Then she let out a moan and her eyes fluttered slightly in pleasure, and he lost all control.

Their lovemaking was hungry and passionate. She pulled his head down and kissed him with fervour as he plunged into her, letting out the occasional moan that almost pushed him over the edge. He could have let go at any moment by this point, but he was determined that this was as good as possible for Lisbon first. Apparently she had the same idea and pushed him off her, only to straddle him. He raised his eyebrows in surprise before grabbing her hips and encouraging her to move. When he reached down and touched her gently she came. She flopped down onto his chest, moaning in satisfaction as the waves of pleasure ran over her body. He let her recover for a few minutes, and the flipped them back over.

He collapsed on top of her as soon as he came. Neither of them knew how long they remained like that, panting slightly and intermittently running their hands over the other's body. With regret, Jane eventually rolled off her and then pulled her into his arms and tugged the comforter over them.

"That was…" Lisbon began.

"Amazing?" Jane finished.

"I was going to say incredible" she shrugged "but yeah"

"I try" he replied modestly.

"You try?" she repeated, rolling onto her side to look at him "I take credit for at least 40%"

"I'll give you 34%"

She rolled her eyes and then snuggled into him again.

"Even now you manage to annoy me" she said, her voice muffled by his chest.

"I don't annoy you" he murmured back "in fact, I do something quite different to you"

"Oh do you?" one eye peered up at him.

"Oh yes" he nodded, running a hand slowly down her back "I can show you again if you'd like"

"You can't seriously be ready to-" she started, as he pushed her onto her back and climbed on top of her.


	17. Chapter 17

**So, here we are at the end! I'm both excited to have finally finished a fic and sad because I'm really going to miss this story! I hope you've enjoyed reading it as much as I have writing. I'm already thinking of doing a follow up (maybe some drabbles and a sequel when they're older?) so keep a look out for that if you're interested.**

 **Thanks for all the support and reviews!**

Lisbon found her first day back at work to be much easier than she had anticipated. Cho had obviously led her team well the past few weeks, and she slotted back into her role as Agent Lisbon with little trouble. Similarly, the fact that Jane was at home with Ella meant that she worried minimally about her daughter's wellbeing. That didn't stop her from leaving the CBI the moment the clock hit 5 though, but it did mean that she wasn't so distracted that she couldn't focus on her work throughout the day.

A tiny part of Lisbon was relieved to be greeted by her daughter's wails and Jane's fruitless attempts to calm her as she walked into their apartment. He always seemed to be so good with Ella, and it made Lisbon feel a little inadequate when she spent ages trying to get her daughter to sleep or stop crying whilst Jane seemed to be able to do it effortlessly.

She found the pair of them in the nursery. Jane was bouncing Ella on his lap, and Lisbon could see a half empty bottle of milk and unused diaper on the changing table. His face lit up when she walked in.

"Hey" he smiled wearily at her "look Ella, your mommy's here. Will that cheer you up?"

Lisbon reached out her arms and Jane placed the crying child in them gratefully.

"Shush little one" she murmured "I've missed you today"

"I told you it would be fine" Jane said.

"Did I say it was?"

"You didn't need to"

Ella's cries had lessened a little now, from full on screaming to sporadic wails. Her face was tinged with red and scrunched up, and she looked as if she was just about to doze off after all of the effort.

"Why don't I have that effect on her?" Jane asked "babies love me normally"

"But she loves me more" Lisbon joked "don't you Ella?"

"Just wait until I get her into that bear romper" Jane muttered.

"She's a child, not a doll" Lisbon reminded him "speaking of which, Grace gave me the dress she got Ella for the wedding. It's in my bag"

Jane picked her bag up from the floor and dug through it, whilst Lisbon glared at him and said something about secrets and privacy.

"This is dangerously…white" Jane commented, holding up the tiny garment.

"She'll look lovely though, won't you Ella?"

"Is she asleep?" Jane asked, standing up and laying the dress on the chair.

"Just about. I'll put her in her cot"

"I could do with a nap too" Jane yawned.

"I only brought home a few case files to catch up on. We could order food? Then I'll look over them whilst-"

"I've already made dinner" Jane cut her off, taking advantage of the fact that Ella was now safely in her cot to lean in and peck Lisbon on the lips "I'll get it ready to eat whilst you do your work"

oooooooooooooooooooo

After dropping Ella off at day-care the following morning, Lisbon checked her phone every few minutes for the rest of the day. She even considered ringing up just to check, but as soon as she started typing in the number on her cell she realised that it was completely unnecessary. The people looking after her daughter were trained and experienced; she had no reason to worry.

"Boss?"

Cho appeared at the door, forcing Lisbon to look away from the framed photo of Ella on her desk.

"I was going over the background check on the father, and I came across this"

He placed a piece of paper on her desk for her to look over.

"Did he mention anything when you went to speak to him?" Lisbon asked.

"No"

"Go and talk to him again" Lisbon told him "take Rigsby"

Just as Cho left, Jane appeared at the door.

"I'm going with Cho" he said "I have a hunch"

"Care to share it with anyone? Say, your boss?" she asked, eyebrows raised.

"Oh come on Lisbon, you only get to be the boss of me _sometimes_ "

She glared at him for a second, and then waved her hand.

"Just go. Try not to get yourself into too much trouble"

He blew her a kiss and left, as Lisbon promised herself to make it a whole half hour before looking at her phone again. She still had 3 cases to look over, and the longer she took the later she would have to leave and collect Ella.

When Cho and Rigsby returned to the bullpen 2 hours later without Jane, Lisbon knew something was up.

"What did he do?" she asked as they walked in.

"Jane? Nothing yet"

"He did go with you didn't he?"

"Yeah, he says that the father is definitely not our man" Rigsby explained, collapsing into his chair "he'll be back any minute"

"But why did he-"

"He drove separately" Rigsby added "said he wanted to stop for a snack"

"Of course he did" Lisbon muttered.

She decided to wait 20 minutes before calling him. Unsurprisingly, he didn't pick up.

"Jane" she began her answer-phone message "I don't know what you're up to but you need to call me back"

15 minutes later, she was starting to worry.

"Just call me back, Jane" she said more softly into her phone "please"

Just as she left her office to ask Van Pelt to trace his phone, the man in question walked into the bullpen with his daughter in his arms.

"Hi Lisbon" he grinned at her "look who I found"

"Found where?" she narrowed her eyes at him, but approached anyway.

"At her day-care" he shrugged "are you gonna say hello to mommy, Ella?"

"You didn't have to collect her early did you? There wasn't a problem?" Lisbon asked worriedly as she took Ella out of his arms and held her close. She had missed her a lot more than she was willing to admit the past few hours.

"They said she was a star" Jane reassured her.

"Hi Ella" Van Pelt cooed, as the rest of the team gathered round to greet her.

"You could have just told us where you were going, man" Rigsby shook his head at Jane, smiling.

"What would be the fun in that?" Jane grinned.

"Did you try her dress on?" Van Pelt asked.

"It was a little tight around the chest, and I think you could see a little too much of my legs – not that Lisbon minded – but it should-"

"I meant on Ella" Van Pelt rolled her eyes, as Lisbon hit Jane's arm.

"Oh right. Perfect fit"

"She's going to look so cute" Van Pelt sighed "I'm so excited"

"You should be; it's our wedding" Rigsby muttered.

"Oh shush" she glared at him "you know what I mean"

"Ok guys, back to work" Lisbon decided eventually "Patrick, why don't you take Ella home? I'll only be another hour or so"

Lisbon didn't notice her address of Jane but the smirks and raised eyebrows from her team said that they hadn't missed it.

"It's nearly 5" Jane pointed out as the rest of the team left "come back with us. She'll need a feed and a long nap I suspect, so we can have some time to ourselves"

Lisbon knew perfectly well what the 'time to [themselves]' would consist of, but she had work which needed doing.

"I can't" she shook her head "I've got forms which need to be in Gable's office by tonight. I'll be an hour at most"

"Come on Teresa" Jane said softly.

"Lisbon, Jane"

She turned round to see her boss marching towards her.

"And mini-Lisbon" he added, sending Ella a small wave.

"I'm sorry boss" Lisbon said quickly "Jane was just about to take her home"

"I never knew someone that was part-Jane could look so…innocent" Gable commented "what's she called again?"

"Ella" Jane supplied "Lisbon and I were just about to go home with her" he added.

"You do that" Gable nodded "give me those case forms tomorrow Lisbon. Nothing is as important as family time" he said absentmindedly.

"But sir, I really should-"

"Nonsense" Gable waved his hand at her protests "go home and spend time with your daughter. They don't stay small that long"

"But I really-" Lisbon protested.

"That's an order, Agent" Gable added, his eyes twinkling.

Jane smirked at her and then reached to take Ella.

"Well…thanks boss" Lisbon said eventually "I'll go uh…get ready"

She walked away to find her bag, leaving Jane and Gable standing together at the side of the bullpen.

"I remember when my son was this size" Gable said, his eyes glued to Ella "you'll be surprised at quite how quickly they grow up"

Jane said nothing, but nodded slowly.

"Of course, you already know that" Gable said suddenly, realising his mistake "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-"

"Don't worry about it"

"Ok, first thing tomorrow we'll go over the whole case again. Maybe something new will jump out" Lisbon instructed her team as she locked her office door "shall we go?"

"Let's"

"Oh actually, I just need to…" Lisbon tailed off, rushing back to her office.

"I'll set off" Jane shrugged to himself "come on Ella, let's get you home"

oooooooooooooooooooo

Van Pelt and Rigsby's wedding was on the following Saturday. It was a fairly small event with just family and close friends, but it was beautifully put together. Cho surprised them all by arriving with a date; a tall, slim woman with waist length brown hair who looked like she had just stepped out of a fashion magazine, but who seemed utterly enamoured by their stoic colleague.

Jane shot Lisbon little smiles and the occasional wink throughout the service, from where he sat in the front row with Ella fast asleep in his lap. Normally Lisbon would berate him for being so obvious about their relationship in front of their colleagues (who they had yet to actually tell), but she was fairly sure that everyone's attention was on the couple at the alter. Ella started fussing just as the ceremony ended, at which point Jane snuck down the aisle and calmed her down outside the chapel, where Lisbon found him after.

"They look so happy" Lisbon murmured to him, as they watched the newly married couple drive away to the reception.

"Is that a tear I see?"

"Where?" Lisbon blinked quickly "you must be seeing things"

Jane smiled knowingly but didn't push it.

"Come on, let's get going" he nudged her "I have a feeling that someone will need changing very shortly"

oooooooooooooooooooo

"I have a sneaky suspicion that our good friend Cho may be in love" Jane whispered in Lisbon's ear.

They were sat on a table at the side of the dance floor, Jane commenting every now and then on a different guest.

"Cho? No way"

"Yes way" Jane insisted "he just smiled. That never happens"

Lisbon watched the couple more closely. They did look very intimate, the way that Alice (as Cho had introduced her) had her arms round his neck and the little looks he kept giving her.

"See?" Jane asked, smirking at her.

"No" Lisbon shook her head "not happening. Cho doesn't do emotions"

"He's a very passionate and emotional man beneath all that stoicism" Jane insisted.

"I don't see it" Lisbon shrugged, as the song finished and Cho and Alice walked off the dance floor towards them.

"I'll go get us drinks" Alice told Cho as he sat down opposite Lisbon.

"How are you Cho? It's a lovely reception isn't it?"

"It's great" Cho nodded.

"Brilliant music" Jane said, more to himself than anyone else "Lisbon, you want to dance?"

"Alright" Lisbon shrugged "but what about Ella?"

"Cho, you wouldn't mind watching Ella for a few minutes?" Jane said, standing up and picking up her basket from the seat beside him "thanks. Shall we?"

Lisbon stood up and smoothed her dress down, before following Jane onto the floor.

"Hey"

Alice was back, holding out a glass of wine for Cho.

"Thanks" Cho took it "I'm babysitting apparently"

"She's very cute" Alice smiled into the basket "your boss's child, right?"

"Yup" Cho nodded.

"They make a sweet couple" Alice titled her head towards the pair of them.

"I know. They think we don't know yet"

"That they're together?" Alice frowned at him "it's very obvious, even without the child"

"It's been obvious for a while" Cho agreed "I don't know what took them so long"

They both looked for a second at Jane and Lisbon swaying together to the music. Lisbon was resting her head on Jane's chest, and he had his arms loosely around her. They looked to all the world exactly what they were: a couple in love.

"Cho's talking about us" Jane whispered into Lisbon's hair "he's wondering why we don't just admit we're together"

"Huh?" Lisbon twisted her head a little to look at her colleague, who was talking to his date again "they can't know for sure though, can they?"

"They're detectives" Jane reminded her "and we do have a daughter together"

"Oh" Lisbon didn't seem particularly bothered "I guess they were gonna find out eventually"

She settled back into Jane's embrace and let him rock her gently round the dance floor.

"I haven't mentioned yet, but you do look stunning" Jane murmured, out of anyone else's earshot.

"You're don't scrub up too badly, I guess" she smiled into his chest "I like the vest"

"I know you do. But you look really beautiful"

They fell silent again, listening to the gentle jazz that played and enjoying their closeness. When the band paused to set up for their next song, they parted and headed back to Cho and Alice.

They didn't stay too much longer. Jane made Lisbon laugh by dancing with Ella (who seemed completely oblivious to it all), and Rigsby and Van Pelt sat down and chatted with them for a bit. Then Ella started to fuss a bit more and they decided to call it a night and get home.

"That was such a lovely wedding" Lisbon told Jane as they lay down in bed that night "just the kind I always imagined having – fairly simple, low key"

"You can have that" Jane replied, rolling onto his side to face her "I know we've never really talked about it before but…well…you are my future. My only future. And I know I don't have that much to offer and I-"

"Oh shut up" Lisbon said quietly "you already got the girl, stop making up reasons"

"I know"

She could hear the smile in his voice. He shuffled a little nearer and ran his hand over her stomach.

"One day" he said softly "we'll get a proper house and a dog and you can have that beautiful traditional wedding you always dreamed of"

"Is this a proposal?" Lisbon asked "I always imagined more fireworks and extravagance"

"I knew you'd imagined it before" he murmured, moving his head to nuzzle her neck softly "but no. Trust me; you'll know when it is"

"Good" she said firmly, shuffling into his side "but try not to embarrass me too much"

"When have I ever embarrassed you?"

"Are you sure you really want to talk about this right now?" she said softly, sliding her hand under his pyjama shirt "when there are so many other things we could be doing?"

"That depends on what the other things are"

"You're the mentalist here. You tell me"

"Well" he said slowly "I have a couple of ideas"

"Go on"

"It might be easier if I show you"

"If you must" Lisbon sighed, just as Jane began raining kisses down her neck.

oooooooooooooooooooo

Three weeks later, Jane insisted on taking Lisbon for a picnic on a Sunday afternoon. On Sunday morning, an urgent lead arose in a case and Lisbon was forced to spend the day at the office trying as her team worked to try and track down the killer.

"Patrick, I'm really sorry" she said into her phone "I don't think I'll be away before 5"

"Don't worry, you have to work"

"I know you'd planned this and everything" she sighed "why can't the bad guys just give us a day off?"

"Don't worry about it" he reassured her "we'll do it another time"

"Are you sure you don't mind?"

"Completely. Do you want me to come in and give you a hand?"

"No, you stay with Ella. We know who it is; we just need to track him"

"Ah, computer work" he said knowingly "not quite my forte"

"No" she agreed "Look I've got to go. I'll text you when I leave"

"Go get 'em"

"I'll try" she smiled for a second "love you"

"Love you too"

She put her phone down and sighed. As much as she loved her job, it was a lot more difficult to be dragged into work in the middle of the night or at the weekend when she had to leave an amazing and boyfriend and daughter at home.

She forced herself to stop focussing on what she was missing out on, and left her office.

"Anything?"

"I might just have something" Van Pelt said, typing quickly on her laptop.

"I've been tracking his credit card movements and I noticed a few cash transfers to another account. I didn't look into them before, but now…"

They did manage to track their killer down and get him safely in cuffs, but it was nearly 7 by the time that Lisbon could leave the CBI. She sent Jane a quick text telling him she was on her way, and then climbed into her car and tried not to break any speed limits on her way back.

"Hi" Lisbon called as she walked into their apartment "I'm sorry, I-"

She broke off when she saw the flickering light coming from the sitting room.

"Jane?" she asked, pulling her gun out of its holster and approaching the door.

"Jesus woman" Jane exclaimed as the door was pushed open and a gun pointed at him.

"Oh god I'm sorry" she sighed, putting the gun away "I've had a long day. What is this?"

The flickering light, it appeared, came from the candles placed on every surface possible in the room. There was a picnic blanket laid out on the floor with a few pillows on, and a wicker basket and cool box sat beside Jane.

"I brought the picnic to our living room" he explained "sort your stuff out and I'll pour you a drink"

"Jane" she said softly "you didn't need to"

"I _wanted_ to" he insisted "go take your boots off"

Lisbon stared around the room for a few seconds, overwhelmed at the sweetness of his gesture before he shooed her out of the room. She threw her bag and boots in the cupboard, and then said hello to her daughter who was currently having her evening nap in her room. When she returned Jane had a glass of champagne in his hand and had already laid out plates for both of them.

"Champagne" she muttered "this is special"

"You are" he countered "so, we've got a salmon dish to start"

He dug around in the basket and procured a foil wrapped parcel and a covered salad bowl.

"Why all the candles?" 

"Ambience" he explained "here"

"Thanks" she took her plate "this looks amazing"

The food tasted as good as it looked. They had made it halfway through the main course when Ella woke up and decided she wanted to join in as well. Having missed being close to her all day, Lisbon held her on one arm as she ate the chocolate mousse dessert with her other.

"God, that was so nice after the day I've had" Lisbon said as she put down her empty mousse bowl. She settled back against the couch and lay Ella down on her lap.

"Another drink?" Jane asked.

"I can't" Lisbon shook her head "I've already had 2"

"I have sparkling elderflower" Jane grinned at her.

"Sparkling elderflower hey Ella? Your daddy is a smart man" Lisbon said, playing with Ella's flailing arms "no, don't kick mommy"

Jane passed Lisbon a refilled glass and then moved to sit beside her.

"You know" he began "it was nearly 10 years ago that I thought my whole life was over"

Lisbon turned to look at him, very aware that their conversation was taking a more serious turn.

"I never imagined being able to actually live again" he continued "let alone love someone. I don't think there are enough words to describe how grateful I am to you"

"You don't have to thank me"

"I know, I know" he nodded "But you have to understand that without you, I wouldn't still be alive now"

He let the weight of his words sink in, and then spoke again.

"I love you more than I ever realised possible. You're so strong and beautiful, and you brought me back to reality and gave me more than I could ever try to repay"

Lisbon sniffed, and then shot him a watery smile.

"I wake up every morning and thank whatever deity it is that you believe in for giving me this second chance" he admitted "I don't know what I did in a past life to deserve someone so giving and kind, and utterly perfect.

"Teresa" he paused and she turned to look at him "I never want to be apart from you again"

He reached his hand down into his pocket and Lisbon took a sharp breath as he pulled out a small box.

"Will you marry me, Teresa Lisbon?"

Lisbon stared at the box in his hands. The ring sparkled in the candlelight, and she couldn't pull her gaze away from it. Then she looked at his face. His eyes were a little red, and she could suddenly see the tension in his expression. He didn't actually know what she was going to say, she realised suddenly.

"I…yes. Of course" she blurted out "of course I'll marry you"

Jane broke out into a smile and placed his hand over hers, Ella's tiny fist inside her own.

"I thought for a second there you were going to refuse" he admitted, kissing her cheek "And I love you too" Jane told his daughter, who was kicking energetically on Lisbon's lap.

"Did you really think I would say no?" Lisbon asked, letting her head rest on his shoulder "after years of telling me you could read me like a book?"

"I couldn't really read you like a book" he confessed "and it became a lot more difficult recently"

"Why?" she looked up and frowned slightly.

"It's a bit too easy to look for what you want to see sometimes" he shrugged.

Jane reached down and picked Ella up from Lisbon's lap, resting her against his chest as Lisbon turned towards him to kiss his cheek.

"Did you hear that little one? You get to dress up for another wedding"

"I'm sure she can't wait" Lisbon said dryly "so do I actually get to try the ring on?"

Jane balanced Ella on one arm whilst he took the ring out, and then slid it onto Lisbon's finger.

"It's beautiful" Lisbon decided "they're not…real diamonds are they?"

"100%" Jane grinned "stop worrying, I'm not changing it. Unless you don't like it"

"I love it" Lisbon said quickly.

"Good" Jane punctuated the word with a kiss on her head "now let's get this one fed and bathed, and then we can celebrate our engagement"

"Let's do that"


	18. Chapter 18

Just a quick note to say that I've now uploaded the first chapter of 'A Life Worth Living' which is a series of oneshots following on from 'Mistake'.

Thanks again for all the follows and reviews!


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